Title: You’ll Never Believe…

Author: Carrie

Pairing/Classification: Harm/Mac Romance

Rating: GS

Summary: This is sequel to ‘Someone I Once Knew’. It’s from Mac’s POV and takes up later that night. I couldn’t help but wonder after I wrote ‘Someone I Once Knew’, how would she tell Harm?

Disclaimer: Not mine, but any mistakes are and I’m sorry.

“Come on big guy. Time for bed,” I say, lifting my healthy little boy off the changing table. Well he better be healthy after those shots today. I did not pace with a screaming baby for almost three hours to have him get diphtheria, polio, or measles, mumps, and rubella.

He crinkles his eyes. Poor thing is so tired. After I rub his belly for almost an hour, he drifts off into a restless sleep. He’ll be up all night.

Best go get myself prepared.

I also have to prepare myself to inform Harm of who I saw today. I actually wasn’t going to tell him, and then I realized he should probably know. Clay was an ex-boyfriend and he was one of Harm’s friends. I’m sure he’d be curious to know what the spook is up to.

“Hey.”

“Hey yourself,” I respond in our usual greeting, sinking onto the bed. Smiling, I rest my head on his shoulder while he does paperwork. “You’ll never believe what happened today.”

He turns to look at me, his expression a mixture of concern and curiousness. For a moment, I’m sidetracked as I stare into his eyes. How could I have been so crazy to ignore this man for almost ten years?

“What happened?”

Shaking my head slightly, I crawl into his lap, snuggling into his chest. He grabs my legs and wraps his arm around them, his other going around my shoulders so he can stroke my hair.

Taking a deep breath, I decide to simply start with the obvious. “I saw Clay.”

“Clay? Clayton Webb?” he demands, his voice hard and almost…mean. “What did the bastard say to you? Did he hurt you? I’m going to…”

“You’re going to what Harm?” I challenge, looking into his eyes. “You’re going to call the Director of the CIA and ask to know where their Deputy Director of Counterintelligence is? And why? Because you’re going to kick his ass?”

He looks sheepish. “No…”

I smile and stroke his cheek with my finger. “I love you. You Harm. Anyway, I was walking by Jacques, that adorable French café where I get my coffee all of the time? He was standing there. He saw me first and I guess it shocked him because I had to order him to sit. We talked for a few minutes before I had to leave to go meet you and Mattie.”

“What did he say?”

I shrug and listen to his heart beating. “He said how he missed me and he wondered if I hated him. I said I didn’t because I don’t really have an opinion of him anymore. I said I didn’t miss him and that I was married to you. Well actually he guessed I was married to you. We spoke briefly about how he said he tried to be you because I couldn’t be happy unless I was with you. I said he never tried, he simply used me. That was about it. Matt didn’t seem keen on him. He bit his finger and then he pushed him away when I hugged him bye.”

“Matt is a good judge of character.”

Smiling, I lift my head and press my forehead against his, our noses brushing. “Matt is six months old and protective of his mother.”

He nuzzles my nose, smiling against my lips. “That year was hell for me,” he whispers, looking into my eyes. “Not only to see the woman I love with another man, but to see her hurting so bad. You tried not to show it, but I could tell. Even when you’d purposely bring him up…I could tell you were unhappy.”

How must that have been for him? He’d lost two jobs in six months, lost a friend in Sturgis, lost Bud and Harriet’s connection. The whole Singer thing was still sort of fresh. His boss was giving him grunt work and the woman he loved was pouring salt on the wound by parading her relationship just to hurt him. Like at Christmas.

Why did I do that? Why did I do anything? Because I was sad. I was miserable and wanted others to be miserable too. I thought Clay was the right man for me, but it turns out he was far from it. He wasn’t Harm.

Tears rise in my eyes as I think of that horrible time. The time when I thought I’d never be with the man I love. “I love you,” I whisper. “And I’m sorry for hurting you with him. But you hurt me too Harm. You didn’t let me in with the Singer-Sergei thing or with Mattie. Not until you wanted to.”

He nods and brushes the tears away. “I know and I’m sorry. We both were just…so messed up. I think in our own warped ways we were scared of each other and the only way to fix that was to hurt.”

“I think you’re right,” I whisper. Gosh, I wasn’t prepared for an emotional talking night. Damn Webb for ever walking back into my life again.

Oh well, it was good to get these emotions out. Maybe now we can finally move on past that part in our lives. We’re together, in love, and have a beautiful baby together.

Harm lifts his head, staring into my eyes. “Did you really love Webb?”

I shrug and give a half smile. “I think I did. But it was like with Brumby and Dalton. Even Chris and Farrow. I forced myself to love the thought of being in love. There’s only one man in my life that I’ve loved. Truly loved. And he’s sitting right in front of me.”

With a small smile, Harm pulls me in for a long kiss. God this man can kiss. He can put any emotion he’s feeling into one and then make me feel that same emotion too. I pull away to catch my breath before he’s pushing me back on the bed, sliding up my t-shirt.

“I love you,” he whispers.

“I love you too,” I reply, pulling him to me again. Oh man…

We both groan as the soft sobs come through the baby monitor. “Someone is pissed,” Harm says, raising an eyebrow.

I climb out from under him and get the baby, rubbing his back as I enter our room again. “I think he should sleep with us tonight.”

Harm nods in agreement and tosses his work onto the floor, climbing under the sheets. I hand Matt off to him while I change into my pajamas.

Once we’re all situated, Matt sleeping between us, I look back over at him. “I don’t think we’re going to see Clay again.”

“I agree,” he says, stroking Matt’s chunky little arm. God that baby looks so much like his father.

I look back at Harm, smiling softly. “I love you Harm.”

“I love you too Mac,” he responds, kissing me gently.

With one more smile, I snuggle into the bed, my baby flyboy and my big flyboy sandwiched next to me.

All things happen for a reason. Maybe the emotional wreck of a year with Clay was what I needed to finally see the light. It finally brought me to what I had truly wanted. Harm.

THE END