Having A baby

Harm and Mac have finally got it right.(just because in my shipper mind it wouldn’t be RIGHT if they didn’t)(if we’d wait fro DB to fix it…well. he’d just not do it to prove that he kept us watching despite the lack of relationship, to spite the shippers.)

Now, since this was inspired by a Canadian Lamaze/pre birth class I saw on TV and it had to be typed ASAP, this wasn’t beta’d. But I just had to put something positive out there…

Having A baby

“Okay you guys, today we are going to create some sympathy and understanding for the moms. I need a volunteer…..” Lucy addressed the group of expecting parents.

None of the men stepped forward.

“Okay, dad over here, you look like a good candidate..” Lucy motioned for Harm to get up.

“Uh, I’d rather not..” Harm stammered. He had only been to this class twice because the Admiral kept sending him on out of town assignments, he was hoping to lay low and enjoy sharing this thing with Mac.

“OOOOHHHH.” The rest of the group shook their heads, realizing that was not the required response.

“Well,…..” Lucy said disdainful, though the group recognized it as a touch of humor, “Harm isn’t it? If Sarah had said that, you wouldn’t be here at all now would you?!”

“I guess,” Harm shuffled on his feet. Mac tried not to laugh at his antics, and hid her smile behind her hand.

“Well, Harm,” She drawled his name, “Guess what?”

‘Oh oh’ He thought, ‘here it comes.’

“Tonight, YOU get to be the mommy!” Lucy made it sound like a good thing, but Harm wasn’t too sure. “Stand over here.” He did as he was told. Lucy turned to Mac who was the quiet one in the group right now. “You trained him well, Sarah. This one can take orders.”

Harm was starting to get annoyed with her till she winked at him. ‘it was all in good fun.’

Lucy took out a white elastic band and tightened it with Velcro across Harms chest and ribs.

“How does that feel, mom?”

“Tight.” Harm tried to keep calm but this thing made breathing rather difficult.

“That’s right. When baby presses against mom, breathing will get difficult. “Now next…”

Lucy turned to get another attribute and when she turned towards Harm his eyebrows shot up to his hairline. ‘You’ve got to be kidding me.’ He thought. ‘Mac will never let me hear the end of this.’

“Okay Harm let’s get this thing on you.” She helped him get in a pregnancy suit not unlike the one Mac wore on her mission to Paraguay 18 months ago.

“Woh, this thing is heavy.”

Harm heard Mac snickering behind him. He turned towards her and smiled all be it with clenched teeth. “The things I do for you.” He joked while pointing his finger at her.

She couldn’t stop smiling. He was so cute standing there in that pregnancy suit while still trying to maintain his flyboy charm. Of course she would never let him know that now!

“You know, next time Webb needs someone to play his wife, I’ll tell him you’re his girl!”

The group laughed despite getting only half the meaning of their banter. And Harm’s suffering wasn’t half way over.

“Okay, Sarah, I need your help.” She helped Mac to her feet and then handed her a heavy pouch in the same colour as Harm’s suit. “Watch out, this is heavy.”

Harm glared at Mac, but the little twitch at the corners of his mouth gave him away. He was okay with this. Mac softly patted his extended belly and their eyes locked, Lucy and the rest of the group forgotten. Lucy raised one eyebrow at the group. She would swear the temperature had gone up several degrees. She cleared her throat none to subtly and some of the group let out appreciative murmurs.

“If you guys are still with us…..Sarah, If you could find his bladder and place the pouch against it.”

Giggling emerged from the others as Mac reached under his belly with the pouch.

“Uhm Mac, that’s not my bladder…” Harm croaked.

“Oops, sorry, how about here?” Mac said taking the experience completely serious.

“Yeah,” Harm gasped, “That would be it.” * Gulp * “Where’s the head?” he asked Lucy.

“Now, a lovely maternity blouse, here you go.”

“Mac? Does this make me look fat?” Harm mimicked her from previous conversations, overdoing it a tad.

“You are SO sleeping on the couch tonight.”

The women laughed and the men brought up similar ‘there ain’t no right answer to that questions’.

“Why don’t you walk around a bit?” Lucy asked after subduing the crowd.

“That’s not that bad, if you ignore being totally uncomfortable.” Harm commented as Mac looked on with pride.

“Okay you lazy boy. You’ve been home all day, why don’t you pick up after yourself?” Lucy scolded him as she dropped some peaces of clothing on the floor for Harm to pick up.

“How the hell am I supposed to do that?”

Harm tried bending, but discovered quickly that that was not the way to go. Bending his knees seemed like a better option. After all.. he exercised, had lifted heavy stuff. Unfortunately he didn’t take in account that his ballast was unevenly distributed and almost tipped over.

Mac began to feel sorry for him. “Why don’t you use something to hold on to?” She offered a solution.

Lucy smiled.

“Thanks honey.” Harm breathed. “And Mac? If you want to stop at one, I’d totally understand.”

More laughter emerged from the group and Mac reached up to bring his lips to hers.

“So, who’s next?” Lucy challenged. “I think Dave had quite a lot to say, come on up buddy, this is your lucky night.”

the end