Nothing Left Unsaid
Wanda Glasshoff
Disclaimer:
The characters aren't mine. I'm just respectfully using them for some fun, not for profit.
Spoilers:
Anything through mid season seven.
Story starts on the next page:
NOTHING LEFT UNSAID
2230 Friday local time Persian Gulf
Commander Harmon Rabb Jr. stepped onto the metal decking of Vulture's Row. A stiff breeze, the combination of the wind the ship headed into and its forward speed, carried the smell of jet fuel and the roar of powerful jet engines to the pilot starved for the excitement of life on a carrier. The thump of the catapult preceded another screaming jet as it hurled across the deck and climbed steeply away from the ship into the starry sky. God, how I miss being part of the action, he thought.
Being a naval aviator like his father was all he'd ever dreamt of and he'd
made those dreams come true until the ramp strike that ended his flying career.
He'd been cleared of any blame by a board of inquiry when he was diagnosed with
night blindness, but he'd felt like it was the end of his world. After spending
his time convalescing with his grandmother, he decided to stay in the Navy, and
he'd made a good career at JAG. But the move to law had been forced upon him by
circumstances beyond his control. Almost three years ago another doctor
discovered that he'd been misdiagnosed and his problem was treatable. Even
though it was a risky surgery, Harm decided to try it. The operation was
successful and he was cleared to fly at night. Against everyone's advice, he
changed his designator and went back to active flight status. That was when he
realized how much he'd grown to love the law and investigation. It had still
been hard to walk away from life as a fighter pilot, but he knew his future was
at JAG and he'd returned with
renewed commitment to the job he'd grown to
love as much as flying.
In his six months with the air command, he'd proven to himself that he was a
worthy successor to his father, even earning another DFC. He'd never give up
flying all together, and everyone in the Navy understood his desire to maintain
his flight qualification. As he watched the jets take flight, he couldn't help
but wish that he could fly their mission with them. A part of him would always
be up there. The words to a poem that he'd
memorized years earlier in junior
high school ran through his mind:
Oh, I have slipped the surly bonds of earth
And danced the skies on laughter-silvered wings;
Sunward I've climbed, and joined the tumbling mirth
Of sun-split clouds . . .and done a hundred things
You have not dreamed of. . .wheeled and soared and swung
High in the sunlit silence. Hov'ring there,
I've chased the shouting wind along, and flung
My eager craft through footless halls of air.
Up, up the long, delirious, burning blue
I've topped the windswept heights with easy grace
Where never lark, or even eagle flew.
And, while with silent, lifting mind I've trod
The high untrespassed sanctity of space
Put out my hand, and touched the face of God.
(John Gilespie Magee, Jr. - Royal Canadian Air Force)
How could anyone be a fighter pilot and not miss it? There is nothing
like
flying F-14 Tomcats!
While he knew that Mac now understood how he felt about flying, that wasn't always true. He remembered the look in her eyes back forever ago, (Was it really only four years?) on the Coral Sea when she'd discovered his skill as a pilot. She'd silently stepped onto the bridge and observed him as he listened to a pilot in trouble during an encounter with a MiG. He'd stood there listening and verbally calling the shots perfectly. He could picture the amazement and pride in the look she gave him.
"You were really good, weren't you," she'd stated, not asked.
"I still am, Mac," he'd answered.
Mac had tried to warn him hat he couldn't go back, that the law was his life, but he hadn't listened. Hell! He needed to go back - - to find himself. To fill the void that had threatened to swallow him after he'd reached the end of his nearly twenty year quest for his father.
He'd been back at JAG for over two years now and his brush with death in the Atlantic Ocean last spring had made him reevaluate his priorities. All he'd thought about while fighting the wind and waves was Mac. He'd been overwhelmed with grief that she'd never know how much he loved her. That he'd blown it back in Sydney, driven her into Brumby's arms. I was such a fool, he chided himself. And he'd been terrified, not of death, but of what Mac and his mother would both go through if his body wasn't found. He didn't want them to have to suffer the same way he had over his father's fate.
But Mac's mysterious visions had narrowed the search from 1,800 square miles to a few hundred feet, leading the search right to him. If not for Mac, he would have died. It had been close the way it was. By the time they got him to the carrier he was already slipping away. Without Skates coming to sick bay and calling him back, he probably would not have had the will to fight.
"Penny for your thoughts, Commander."
He hadn't heard Admiral Boone approach and wondered how long he'd been standing there.
"Just wishing I hadn't lost so much time. I really wanted all this for my career," Harm answered wistfully, gazing at the bustle of the flight deck.
"Do you remember that first time we met in the line of duty?" Admiral Boone asked.
"Yeah, you thought I didn't belong on a carrier. I even heard you said it was a pity I couldn't fly like my dad," Harm answered ruefully.
"And you proved how wrong I was when you saved my six. I've always been grateful that I let you take that ride."
Harm laughed.
"Harm, you're one of the best pilots I've ever seen. At least as good as your Dad. No, don't interrupt. . ." he stated firmly as Harm started to protest. "I've no doubt that your father is incredibly proud of you. I'm sure he's been with you every step of the way, protecting you in all the life and death situations you manage to get into."
Harm chuckled, "He's probably getting a little weary then."
"You said it!" Admiral Boone joined in his laughter then turned serious. "Harm, Clayton Webb is one of your friends isn't he?"
"Yes, he is. Clay's been a pain in the neck at times, gotten Mac and me into more scrapes than I can count, but also saved our sixes more than once too. I never know what he's going to get me into, but we respect each other."
"Harm, I hate to tell you this, Clay has been captured by Al Queda terrorists. They are going to execute him in 24 hours." Admiral Boone stared out over the rolling ocean.
"No, we have to do something. We need men like Clay in this war!" Harm protested.
"The President has given permission for a rescue attempt, but we need to use
all volunteers. We'll be flying into Iran, a country that has refused us
permission for military operations, even this rescue mission, saying there is no
proof that terrorist camps exist within their borders. Since Clay was there
covertly, there is no record of his entering the
country."
"Do you have a plan?" Harm asked.
"According to the CIA operatives in Iran, Clay was captured in a highly fortified area in the southwestern mountains. Intel said Clay's injuries are severe. We have a group of SEALS who will be airlifted in to rescue Clay. We'll use Sea Hawks, but we'll need fighters to take out the terrorist camp once Clay is secured and protect the choppers from enemy fighters and missiles on their way back out."
"Admiral, I'd like to volunteer to fly this mission. Clay's my friend. He managed to get my brother out of Chechnya and into the United States. I owe him." Harm looked Tom Boone in the eyes, "You once told me how you felt about not being able to stay with my Dad. Please let me go after my friend."
"Harm, you haven't flown combat for a while and this mission could get dangerous. Are you up for it?"
"You know better than to ask a Navy pilot a question like that! I was born ready!" he chuckled. "Seriously, you just said I was a good pilot."
"I'm going in with the Sea Hawks. There's no one I'd rather have covering my six! I'd be glad to have you. Are you willing to fly solo? We don't have many available people with the missions we're already flying. Keeter would be your wing man."
"I'd love the chance to fly with Jack again. Ready whenever you are Admiral!" Harm couldn't keep the smile out of his voice. "Thank you for giving me this opportunity for one more combat mission, sir!"
"Better go get some rest, son. We go in a few hours."
"Yes, sir." Harm saluted and headed below deck. He wanted to write a few letters and record a couple of letter tapes, just in case. He didn't want to leave anything unsaid. Harm thought of the diamond ring sitting in his desk at home. He'd purchased it months ago. We've been through so much over the past six years. I don't want to waste any more time. When I get home Mac . . . when I get home!
The previous day, Thursday 1610 Local time JAG Headquarters, DC
(0010
Local Time Friday Persian Gulf)
Mac swung by Harm's office on her way back from court. Still no sign of him. She hadn't seen him all day. In fact, she hadn't seen or heard from him since they'd had breakfast early Wednesday, before she'd left for Norfolk to take depositions in the case she was prosecuting. What is he up to? she wondered.
Mac changed directions and approached Tiner. "Is the Admiral free?"
"I'll check, Colonel." Tiner dialed and spoke briefly. "You can go right in."
"Thank you, Tiner," Mac smiled at him as she opened the door and stepped into the office, saluting her commanding officer.
"At ease, Colonel. What can I do for you?" Admiral Chegwidden asked, knowing full well what was coming.
"Sir, I haven't seen Commander Rabb all day. Is he out of town on an assignment?" Mac asked tentatively.
Damn you, Rabb! The least you could have done was leave her a message, A.J. thought. "By now, Commander Rabb is on a carrier in the Persian Gulf. Admiral Boone is on board observing how our forces are holding up in the war on terrorism, and there was a minor accident to investigate, so Harm begged for the assignment and a chance to get out to the carrier, see the Admiral, and observe the action. He was between cases, so I decided to humor him. He should be back in a few days."
"Thank you, Admiral. I'm sorry to bother you. I just had a case I wanted to discuss with him."
Her hesitation told him more than words could have about her real reasons for the inquiry. "Mac, sit down," A.J. spoke softly. "We need to talk."
Sarah Mackenzie sat down slowly, wondering what he wanted. "Admiral?" she asked hesitantly.
"Colonel, may I speak freely. . .as your friend?"
"Yes, sir," she replied softly.
"Mac, I saw how Harm's accident last spring affected you. I know you feel strongly for him. . . Do you love him?" he asked gently.
Mac's eyes flew to his; she started to deny it, but stopped. "Yes, sir," her voice was a mere whisper.
"Mac, I don't know what has happened between the two of you during the past year, but I know how worried Harm was during the embassy siege, and I've seen the way he's always looked at you, ever since that first day in The Rose Garden. I'm pretty sure he feels the same way you do." He shook his head. "Mac, work it out when he gets back. It's time."
"Aye, sir," she said with a watery smile which A. J. returned. "Thank you, sir." She stood at attention.
"Dismissed, Colonel."
Mac saluted and returned to her own office wondering, What prompted the Admiral to get so personal? She worked for several more hours beforereturning home.
Thursday, 1945 Mac's apartment Georgetown
Mac picked up her mail and unlocked her apartment door. She sank onto the couch and flipped through the envelopes, her mind not really registering what she was looking at until her eyes fixed on familiar handwriting. She tore open the envelope, postmarked the previous day.
Mac,
I'm sorry I left before you got back from Norfolk, but I had a chance to handle a quick accident investigation on a carrier. You know how much I enjoy getting on a flight deck. Beside, Tom Boone is out there right now and maybe I can hook a ride on one of the missions.
Mac, there is so much we still need to talk about. I think it's time, don't you? When I get home, we're going to have that conversation we've been putting off. No excuses. This should only take a few days, but I hate leaving Sergei. He's still getting acquainted with the city. Check on him for me. See you soon.
Semper Fi, Mac
Harm
Mac smiled as she read Harm's letter. She could almost hear the boyish wonder that always crept into his voice when he spoke about flying. She could imagine how his eyes lit up when he got permission to fly out to the carrier.
She was both thrilled and terrified about having their long overdue talk. What if he doesn't feel the same way I do? she wondered.
Mac heard the phone and grabbed it on the first ring, "Hello."
"Mac, it's Sergei. How about joining me for a large 'meat lovers' pizza?" He sounded hopeful and, except for wanting meat pizza, so like Harm.
"Sounds great. I'll be over in about an hour." Mac hung up the phone and headed for the bedroom to change out of her uniform. I wonder if Harm asked him to look after me? she mused.
Pizza and an evening at Harm's apartment with his brother were just what the doctor ordered. Sergei had pumped her for stories about Harm and she'd willingly obliged, sharing their encounters with poachers, drug dealers, and Russian MiGs. Sarah enjoyed visiting with Sergei. He'd been good for Harm, who seemed happier than ever with his brother safe in America. Finally, it was time to head home.
"Take care, Sarah. Harm will be home soon," Sergei told her.
Sarah gave into her curiosity and asked, "Did Harm give you orders to take care of me?" she asked.
"Yes, but if you tell him I told you, I'll deny it," Sergei laughed as Sarah shook her head in exasperation at Harm's protectiveness.
Friday, 1430 JAG Headquarters
"Colonel, Admiral Chegwidden would like to see you in his office." Mac looked up at Lt. Simms who was filling in for Tiner.
Mac stood, wondering what was up this late on a Friday.
"Colonel Mackenzie reporting, sir," she stood at attention before her CO.
"At ease. Sit down, Mac." A.J. stood behind his desk looking a million miles away.
Sarah sat down, her eyes never leaving the Admiral. She could tell he was forcing himself to remain detached, giving her an uneasy feeling. "I just received some information that needs to stay between the two of us."
The stormy look in the Admiral's eyes scared her, "Yes, sir. Sir, nothing has happened to Commander Rabb?" she couldn't keep the concern out of her voice.
"No, it's Clayton Webb. A terrorist cell has captured him and they have informed the President that he will be executed in approximately 24 hours if we don't release the prisoners we're holding at Guantanamo Bay. I know that you've had your differences with Clay, but you and the Commander seem to be among the few friends that Clay has. We both know that the media will eventually get the story; I thought you should know before it breaks."
"Thank you, sir. Do you think Harm knows?" Sarah knew that Harm would be devastated if Clay were killed. They had become closer over the years, especially in the past few months since Clay had rescued Sergei from Chechnya.
"I assume so, Colonel. We're weighing our options and if a rescue effort is attempted, it will be conducted from the carrier that Harm is onboard." The Admiral saw the emotion that flickered in Mac's eyes. Only someone who knew her well would have caught it. The tough Marine was terrified that something would happen to the Commander. "Mac, he'll be okay."
Sarah tried to maintain her Marine facade, but the gentle tone of his voice and her fear for Harm were making it darn hard.
"Mac, Harm isn't assigned to the fleet. He might even be on his way home already."
"You don't believe that, Admiral. You know Harm! If there is a rescue mission, he'll find some way to be a part of it."
"Colonel, Harm is an exceptionally good pilot. He can handle himself on the ground or in the air with the best the Navy and Marines have to offer. Hell, he's even taken part in black ops with Seals! Even if he goes in, Harm will come back. Don't let yourself think anything else."
"Thank you, sir," she smiled weakly as she stood. She needed to be alone. She didn't know how much longer she could hold her composure.
"Dismissed, Colonel."
Mac saluted and turned to leave, but the Admiral's voice stopped her. "Mac, if Harm calls you, let me know. I care about him too."
"Yes, sir." Sarah Mackenzie walked slowly through the Admiral's door, across the bullpen to her own office, and shut her door behind her. By the time she reached her desk, tears flowed freely down her face. She slumped into her chair and stared at the recent photo of Harm and herself next to his corvette on Christmas Day.
"Oh God, Harm. Why didn't I just take the chance that you feel the same way I do and tell you how much I love you? Don't leave me, Flyboy. Come back to me, please!" Mac prayed.
Friday, 1800 DC Sarah's apartment Georgetown
Sarah Mackenzie unlocked the door to her apartment, walked in and tossed her briefcase on a chair. She dropped onto the couch and stared out the window deep in thought. I'm exhausted. I lost my case this morning, but it's insignificant compared to finding out that Clay is going to be executed. There is no way that Harm will sit by and do nothing, even if he has to steal a plane and go in alone. Harm, I need you. Even if all we're doing is arguing legal point in a case, just hearing your voice lifts my spirits. Your smile brightens my cloudiest days.
Sarah's head throbbed with tension. She decided to take a shower and lie down
for a few minutes, then make something light for dinner. Once out of the shower,
she lay on the bed and gazed at the picture of Harm on her nightstand. He was
seated in Sarah, his baseball cap on backwards and that huge flyboy grin
lighting up his face. She loved the picture because Harm looked especially
handsome and sexy, and that particular smile had been
directed at her. Warm
memories of happy times with Harm relaxed her, and she drifted off to sleep.
Friday, 2000 local time DC; Sarah's Apartment, Georgetown
"Sarah!"
Sarah jerked awake with a scream. In her dark bedroom, she could still
envision the ball of flame from her dream - the ball of flame where seconds
before there'd been an F-14. "No! It's not possible! It's just a horrible
dream!" she told herself, but she couldn't make the vision go away. Sarah raced
to the bathroom and sank down next to the commode as waves of nausea engulfed
her. She lost track of how long she sat there. Finally, so
weak that she had
to pull herself up, Sarah splashed her face with water and stumbled back to the
bedroom. She checked her bedside table for her address book and dialed the
Admiral who answered after the first ring.
"Sir, I'm sorry to bother you," she stammered through the catch in her throat.
"What is it, Colonel?" A.J. Chegwidden asked, concern for her evident in his voice.
"Sir, do you have any way of reaching Harm? I need to know he's safe." Mac knew she was being unprofessional, but right now, she didn't care. The image of the exploding plane and Harm's scream wouldn't go away.
"Mac, the carrier is running a lot of missions, I don't know if I can get through."
"Oh God!" Mac barely breathed, but A.J. heard her.
"Mac, why the sudden concern?" he asked softly, afraid to hear her answer.
"I was taking a nap and had a nightmare, Admiral," she said shakily. "It has to be just a nightmare!" she mumbled softly to herself.
"Mac?" That single word echoed his anxiety.
"I saw an F-14 explode. Admiral, I heard Harm scream my name." Colonel Sarah Mackenzie broke down in sobs on her end of the line.
"Sarah, I'll be right over. Try to stay calm," A.J. told her. After hanging
up, he called Harriet and asked her to meet him at Mac's apartment. Then he
called the Secnav to find out if a rescue mission was under way. The Secnav
confirmed that there was and that Commander Rabb was a part of the team. "Sir,
please patch a message through to Harm that I need him to call me as soon as he
is able. I want to know immediately if you receive word that anything has
happened to Commander Rabb." After receiving the Secnav's
assurance that he
would be contacted, AJ drove to Mac's apartment. He and Lt. Simms pulled up at
the same time.
"Thank you for coming, Harriet. Sarah needs our support. She had a nightmare about Harm. Unfortunately, when Sarah has a nightmare, you can't be sure it isn't her second sight. I've never heard her so upset, even when Commander Rabb was lost at sea last year."
"Admiral, you know I'll do whatever I can for the Colonel." She shook her head, "Life would be a lot easier for the rest of us if those two worked out their relationship." The Admiral nodded his agreement. "I'm afraid loosing Harm would destroy Sarah," Harriet continued sadly. They reached Sarah's apartment and Harriet knocked softly. "Colonel, it's Harriet and Admiral Chegwidden," she called.
Mac, dressed in one of Harm's Navy tee shirts and blue boxers, opened the
door to let them enter. Her hair was tousled from sleep, but still attractive in
her simple cut. It was her tear stained face that raised concern in her friends.
Mac had been through enough grief for several lifetimes in the few years they'd
known her, but neither of them had ever
seen her this emotionally ravaged.
"Mac, I've talked to the Secnav. He'll try to get a message to Harm to contact us ASAP."
"Admiral, I can't get the vision of that jet exploding out of my mind," Sarah's words broke as tears erupted again.
"Colonel, you have to pull yourself together. Where is the tough Marine we all know and love?" A.J. Chegwidden was worried. He'd never seen Sarah Mackenzie like this. She was usually so calm, even in a crisis.
"Sarah, we don't know that anything is wrong. This could just be a nightmare. This is Harm we're talking about. He's resourceful. Even if there was an accident, he's a survivor." Harriet Simms tried to reassure her.
"I want to believe that," Mac answered softly.
A ringing phone startled all of them. A.J. reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone. "Chegwidden, here," he answered, walking to the window and staring into the darkness. The silence in the room was deafening as the Admiral listened to the person on the other end of the line. "Yes, sir. I understand. Thank you." A.J. clicked off the phone and returned to Sarah who sat on the couch with Harriet.
One look at his face, and Sarah knew the worst. "Oh God, No!" she sobbed.
A.J. sat down on the other side of Mac and took her in his arms. "Sarah, I'm
sorry. It isn't good." He looked into her eyes, but had to turn away, they
contained so much pain. "A SEAL assault team was sent in to rescue Clay after
all diplomatic efforts with the Iranian government to intervene failed. They
were dropped a few miles from the terrorist camp
where Webb was being held.
They achieved surprise and secured Clayton. Then Commanders Rabb and Keeter
attacked and destroyed the camp. Once that was accomplished, the Sea Hawk
helicopters went back in to extract Clay and the SEALS. Harm and Keeter flew
cover for the Sea Hawks. Keeter's plane was hit by fire from another terrorist
base before Harm swooped in and destroyed it. Since Keeter's plane was loosing
fuel badly, Harm ordered him out of hostile territory, then stayed alone to
cover the Sea Hawks. Before they were out of Iranian air space, three MiGs
attacked them. We're not sure whose planes they were or where they were
launched. Harm used his counter measures and remaining missiles to successfully
avoid two of the MiGs and shoot them down. Out of both countermeasures and
missiles, he ordered the helicopters to stay on coarse for the carrier and he
went after the final MiG. He reported hitting the MiG with cannon fire seconds
after the MiG locked on and fired a missile at him. Harm's fighter was on radar
one second, gone the next. We know that the MiG went down too. No one else was
left in the area to see if Harm ejected. There was no distress signal or
communication from Harm after the explosion. More planes arrived within ten
minutes It was still dark; they didn't see any sign of the Commander."
The Admiral, who'd stared straight ahead during his narrative, glanced at Mac. Tears streamed down her face, but she was otherwise perfectly still, no other sign of the emotional turmoil she was under. That worried the Admiral more than hysterics.
"Mac, Harm's listed as MIA. They're sending photo recon in to take another look at the wreckage, but the chances of finding him alive appear slim."
"Harm's mother?" Mac choked out. "A Navy chaplain was sent right away. and
Tom Boone called her when he reached the carrier. I can't even imagine how hard
this will be for Mrs. Burnett. Tom feels responsible since he arranged for Harm
to join the
mission."
"What about Clay?" Mac asked softly.
"He's beat up, but he'll survive," A.J. told her.
"Good, Harm would hate it if his dea. . . if this was all for nothing." Mac wiped tears from her eyes. Her detached control scared A.J.
"Harriet, can you stay with Sarah? I want to go to my office and monitor the situation," A.J. requested..
"Of course, Admiral," Lt. Simms answered.
"Admiral, I'll be fine. I don't need anyone to watch over me. Has anyone told Sergei?" Sarah asked suddenly.
"I don't believe so. I can stop by Harm's apartment to do it." A.J. answered softly.
"No, I'll do it. You can both go on home," Sarah's voice was emotionless.
"Colonel. Are you sure you're up to that?" A.J. inquired.
"Admiral, I need to do this. Harm would want me to tell him," Sarah insisted.
"Okay, Mac. Contact me if you need anything."
"Yes, sir." Sarah showed them both out, then sank down against the door, pulled her legs up to her chest and hugged them tightly. Her head dropped to her knees, and she gave in to her grief.
"Harm, why did we waste all this time? You did love me, didn't you?" Mac mourned what might have been, the children they might have had, that she'd never know what it felt like to make love to her soul mate.
2300 local time Friday DC - Harm's Apartment
Sarah knocked softly on the door of Harm's apartment. How am I going to tell Sergei his brother is gone?
Sergei opened the door, surprised to see Sarah. "Hi, why are you out so late?" he started cheerfully, then stopped at the look of pain on her face. "Sarah, come in. What is wrong?"
Sarah broke into tears when he put his arms around her. He led her to the couch, sat down and pulled her against him. His own heart raced, realizing that something devastating had happened. Not Harm, he worried.
Sergei murmured softly in Russian and stroked Sarah's hair while cradling her head against his shoulder. Gradually, Sarah's tears subsided, but she stayed in the comforting embrace of Harm's little brother.
"Sergei, Harm took part in a mission to rescue Clayton Webb who was being held by a terrorist cell. Harm's plane was shot down a few hours ago." She felt his arms tighten around her. "They don't know for sure, but they think he was still aboard when it exploded." Her voice broke and the tears started again. Sergei laid his head against hers and held her tightly, his own escaping tears dampened her dark hair. Gradually, Sarah told him everything she knew.
"Sarah, have hope. One thing I have learned about my brother; he's a survivor." Sergei brushed tears from Sarah's cheek.
"I hope you're right. Neither of us has had enough time with him," she answered sadly.
Sergei studied her for a moment, "You're in love with him, aren't you," he stated rather than asked.
Sarah nodded, the lump in her throat preventing her from speaking.
"Why aren't you together then?" He kicked himself for the insensitivity of voicing the question that had plagued him since their first meeting several years earlier in Russia.
"I don't know if he feels the same way," she murmured.
"Oh, Sarah, I don't know my brother as well as I hope to, but I can see how he looks at you!" Sergei said with conviction.
Sarah smiled at him sadly. "I hope I get the chance to tell him how I feel."
"Sarah, you need to rest. You're emotionally exhausted and there's nothing we can do until we hear more from the Navy. Come on, you're going to get some sleep." Sergei helped her up and led her to Harm's bed. She sat down on its edge and ran her hand over his pillow while Sergei pulled one of Harm's shirts out of the closet. "Here, Sarah. Put this on and then try to get some rest."
"Thank you, Sergei. You know, you're a lot like Harm."
Sergei smiled and nodded, then walked back down to the hide-a-bed in the living room.
Sarah changed in the bathroom and checked the vanity for a spare toothbrush. She knew Harm always kept a few new ones around. She'd had occasion to use them more than once over the years when they were working long hours on a case. She brushed her teeth and washed her face.
Sarah pulled back the covers on Harm's bed and crawled in. She scanned the
room, her gaze froze on the photographs sitting on the bookcase across the room.
Three of them were familiar, she's seen them on other visits to Harm's
apartment: Trish and Frank; Harm's grandmother, Sarah; and his father's military
portrait from the Naval Academy. Two new pictures had joined them: Harm and
Sergei by Sarah's Christmas tree, and a picture of her. She crawled out of bed,
crossed the room, and picked up the photograph.
She recognized the occasion
instantly, but she'd been unaware that Harm had taken the picture. She smiled,
remembering the glorious autumn day. Harm had suggested the outing. He'd offered
to baby-sit little A.J so Bud and Harriet could get away for a weekend. He'd
called her to see if she wanted to go to the park with them. The day had been
unseasonably warm and the leaves unbelievably beautiful: gold, orange, red, and
even some that were almost mauve. They gathered up piles of leaves, then A.J
would jump in them and throw them into the air. She and Harm had each done their
share of romping in the leaves with their godson. The close-up of herself that
she held in her hands was happy and carefree. Leaves floated down all around
her. Her smile was radiant and her eyes sparkling and full of joy. Harm had
enlarged it to an 8X10 and displayed it with his family photos, across from his
bed. Tears filled Sarah's eyes. "Harm," she sighed, "Why didn't you tell me?"
Sarah returned the picture to the shelf and crawled back into Harm's bed. She lay down on the pillow and pulled the covers up around her. Harm's scent filled her nostrils and gentle tears coursed down her cheeks as she reached over and shut off the light.
1000 Saturday Persian Gulf (0200 DC time)
Tom Boone watched the recon planes land. He already knew the results of the mission: There had been no sign of life in the mountainous terrain where Harm's plane had gone down. Debris had been scattered over a large area. No distress call or homing beacon had been detected, and they had not found any wreckage large enough to hold a body. All evidence seemed to indicate that Harm was killed when the plane exploded.
"Admiral," Commander Keeter made his presence known. "I feel responsible. If I had reacted quicker, been able to avoid that hit from ground fire, I'd have been there to help Harm."
"Son, no one's at fault. We're at war. We were all just doing our jobs. Harm would never blame you and would kick your six for even thinking that way! - - - But that doesn't mean we won't all live with the 'what if's' for the rest of our lives." He shook his head. "I've lived with my own about Harm's dad back in 'Nam."
"Yes, sir," Jack Keeter answered. "Sir, will he at least be recognized for what he did?"
Admiral Boone nodded sadly. A Navy Cross at the least, Congressional Medal if I have anything to say about it. He could have made it out of there, could have ejected when the MiG fired the final missile, but he stayed on that MiG putting himself in harm's way to make sure that it didn't come after the Sea Hawks."
"That's who he was, always laying it on the line for others," Keeter stated matter of factly. "Thank you, Sir," Keeter saluted and left the Admiral alone to his thoughts.
Tom Boone looked up at the clear blue sky and whispered, "God's speed son. I hope you and your dad finally get to know each other." He shook his head. A.J and Trish will never forgive me, and Colonel Mackenzie will have one more reason to hate me, he thought sadly as he headed to his stateroom to get a few hours sleep and then at a more appropriate hour stateside, make more phone calls.
1100 Saturday Mountains, somewhere in Iran (0300 DC)
"Mac! Mac!" The sound of his own voice brought Commander Harmon Rabb, Jr. around. He was sure his eyes were open, but he couldn't see anything. Panic gripped him as he reached out into the blackness. His hands touched cold, hard rock. The movement caused him to wince in pain, but he quickly reached in other directions - - -more rock! Where am I? he wondered, then he remembered the MiGs. He knew the final MiG had fired a missile. What happened? His head hurt like hell, but he forced himself to think back . . .
It had felt so good to be back in action, his adrenaline pumping, and his
heart racing. The rescue team took off first, and was dropped a few miles from
the terrorist camp. A CIA operative met them and led them directly to the
building where Clay was being held. Along with Keeter, Harm launched on schedule
to be over the area forty-five minutes later. The plan worked perfectly. The
SEAL team secured and painted the target for the
Tomcat's attack. Two
laser-guided bombs had destroyed the complex. The Sea
Hawks quickly moved in
to pick up the American team and they headed back out
of Iran toward
International territory.
As Harm and Keeter circled the area, fire from another site struck Keeter's Tomcat causing him control problems and his plane to loose fuel. Harm remembered ordering Jack back to the carrier, "Get out of here! I don't want to worry about another friend in trouble down there. The Navy wouldn't appreciate them getting their hands on your aircraft either. I can baby-sit the helicopters till we get back over international waters."
"Commander, a couple more Tomcats are heading your way. ETA about fifteen minutes," Air Operations reported.
"Roger," Harm responded.
"See you on the deck," Keeter told him as he peeled off and headed back to the carrier.
Now forewarned, Harm took a pass through the hostile valley and when the terrorists opened fire, he hit them with one of his missiles. "Smoked the guns," he reported.
Harm headed after the helicopters and suddenly spotted three MiGs on his radar. They were headed directly for the Sea Hawks. He wasn't sure if they'd detected him yet.
"Sea Hawks, we're getting company. Three MiGs inbound at four o'clock. Stay on your heading for the ship. I'll intercept and keep them busy. God's speed."
"Hammer, you've only got one missile left and you're outnumbered three to one," Admiral Boone responded.
"Aye, sir. We don't have any choice. You can't outrun them and the other birds won't be here fast enough. I'll just have to take a couple of them out with cannon fire. I know someone else who used to do that even though he had available missiles."
"On the deck, Commander," Admiral Boone signed off.
One of the MiGs locked on a Sea Hawk and fired just as Harm loosed a missile
on him. Harm raced in at an angle and flew between the inbound missile and the
helicopter, drawing the heat-seeking missile away from the bird. By using
flares, a quick roll to the right, and a steep climb, he managed to avoid the
missile. He'd seen the first MiG explode in a direct hit, and came up firing his
cannon at the second MiG, scoring another hit.
The bird went down spewing
smoke and flame, its crew ejecting to safety.
Harm knew the instant the final MiG locked on him and fired. He deployed his counter measures and pulled up in a steep climb, then rolled quickly away from the path of the incoming missile. It was close, but he avoided it.
The MiG still had a least one missile, and Harm knew the other planes
wouldn't be there in time to either help him or keep it off of the Sea Hawks. He
circled back for the last MiG. Just as Harm was maneuvering into position to
fire his cannons, he heard the warning signaling that the MiG had missile lock
on him. He stayed on course despite the missile now headed his way. Harm didn't
have any defensive measures left and the
missile was closing in, but he
didn't have any choice. He coolly made the necessary moves and fired his cannon.
He saw the canopy of the MiG explode and the plane spiral out of control.
Harm flinched, he didn't remember triggering his ejection, only the thrust as he hurled through the air, and the heat of his aircraft exploding beneath him. He remembered screaming Sarah's name when he thought the fireball that had been his Tomcat might engulf him. Miraculously it hadn't.
But where am I now? he wondered. His head throbbed. He touched it and felt a bandage, sticky with blood. A bandage. . .Where did that come from? Is the Navy looking for me?
Suddenly, Harm heard the muffled sound of footsteps and froze. They sounded only inches away. He reached for his service revolver and realized it was gone.
"Commander, Rabb" he heard a voice call softly. "I'm a friend."
He's speaking English! Harm thought, then heard a grating sound and light leaked in around the edge of a large slab of rock that was gradually moving. Harm tried to lever his body to defend himself, but a sharp pain in his side almost caused him to cry out. The rock was lowered, and an individual in traditional Muslim attire was peering in at him.
"Commander, I'm glad to see that you've regained consciousness. I was worried about you. He extended a hand and helped Harm out of the cleft in the rock.
Harm grimaced in pain and sat down. He looked around. They were on a ledge under an outcropping. They wouldn't be visible from any distance away. "How did I end up in that little 'rabbit hole'?" Harm asked, still wary of the stranger.
"I hid you there. I did not want any of the fundamentalist soldiers in the area to get their hands on you. It would not have been pleasant, and my good friend, Clayton Webb, would have been most unhappy."
"Clay!" Harm smiled, "You work for Webb. Well . . .how are we going to keep me from ending up at the end of a rope or in front of a firing squad?" Harm knew his situation was serious, quite aware that he was deep in hostile territory. He was in danger not only from Al Queda terrorists, but also from a government with less than friendly relations with his own. They had flown into Iran's airspace despite being denied permission.
"First, I'll wrap your chest to make it easier for you to move. I'm pretty sure you have some broken ribs." He continued to talk as he worked, quickly applying a binding to protect the injured area, "Do you remember what happened after you ejected?"
"No, not really. Only a fireball."
"I'm part of a network that Clay has put together in Iran to gather information about fundamentalist activities. I knew of his capture, but wasn't part of the rescue mission. I was heading into the mountains on my normal business, when I saw your aerial battle. I observed your parachute in the glow of the explosion and knew that if I'd seen it, so might others. The debris from your plane must have damaged your chute because your descent was erratic. You hit a rock ledge and must have blacked out. I found you unconscious and carried you up here. I quickly wrapped your head wound to staunch the flow of blood and hid you behind that rock. I knew I needed to make it look like you'd been killed, or the enemy might have started a thorough enough search to find you or stuck around long enough that you'd find your way out of there and stumble into them."
The man finished binding Harm's ribs and started to unwrap the bandage around his head. "I'll change the dressing on that cut. It's still bleeding and could use some stitches, but a butterfly bandage will have to suffice for now." Once again he worked quickly and efficiently. Harm, still woozy from the crash, sat quietly and let him take care of the injury.
"We need to get you out of Iran before you're discovered. I destroyed your
radio and homing beacon, which would have led the opposition to you before your
people could have arrived. Then I erased the evidence that you'd survived the
crash. I'll need to make contact with others in our network in order to let your
people know that you're alive. There are safer ways to get you out of the
country than trying another military exercise."
He finished administering
first aid and pulled a white robe, similar to his own, from his backpack. "Put
this on over your flight suit. You won't be so obvious from a distance." He
helped Harm slide into the clothing.
"We'll need to get off this mountain and a little further from the crash site immediately, but it will be safer if we wait until nightfall before traveling any real distance. By the way, my name is Sam."
"Harm. Where did you learn such good English?' he asked, curious about his companion.
"Boston," the man in his early thirties responded. "I was born here and my grandparents still live here, but I grew up in the States. My father is a professor of mathematics at MIT and I have a degree from Harvard."
"You being here to cover my six must mean that my time's not up today, but I'd rather not tempt fate. Let's get moving," Harm suggested.
Sam helped Harm to his feet and handed him his service revolver. "I didn't want you shooting me when I came back for you," he explained.
"You were pretty good at patching me up," Harm commented as they started along the path off the mountain.
"I'm a doctor. I came back to Iran to help the country people. I've seen the
poverty on my visits to my grandparents. Then I met Clay and he convinced me
that I could help both the peace-loving Iranian people and the United States by
working for him against the terrorists and government extremists who call the
shots here and elsewhere. I'm a U.S. citizen, but that is hidden so that I can
continue to use my Iranian passport and move
about freely."
"You're in a pretty dangerous business," Harm commented.
"I'm not the one that just had a plane blow up around me!" Sam laughed.
"You have a point," Harm smiled at him. He liked this young idealist and patriot.
The two men grew silent as they scanned the rough terrain around them for signs of life, then moved on along the path through the rocky terrain.
0600 Saturday local time DC Harm's apartment (1400 Iran)
Sergei quietly let himself in from an early morning run. He hadn't been able to sleep and had used the long brisk run to relieve his stress. He couldn't bring himself to believe that his brother was dead. It had to be a mistake.
Sergei crept towards Harm's bedroom to check on Sarah. She looked like an angel lying in the bed, her arms embracing the pillow on which her cheek rested. Sarah sighed contentedly and a hint of a smile touched her lips. Sergei backed out of the room quietly. "Sweet dreams," he whispered.
Sarah lay her cheek against Harm's shoulder and rested her hand on his chest. His spicy male scent and the arm around her shoulder brought a sense of peace and safety she'd never experienced before. "Thank you for giving me such a handsome son and adorable daughter," he whispered before kissing her.
The ringing phone intruded on her dream and Sarah's eyes flew open. The events of the previous night washed over her, leaving her cold and scared. She sat up, the pillow clutched to her breast.
Sergei answered the phone, "Rabb residence." He glanced toward the bedroom and met Sarah's terrified gaze. "Yes, Admiral. Sarah told me. . . . Sarah is here, sir. I didn't want her to be alone last night. . . .Yes, we'll both wait for you here." Sergei hung up the phone. "Admiral Chegwidden is on his way over. He wants to talk to both of us. I'll make some coffee while you dress."
Sarah nodded wordlessly and laid her head against Harm's pillow, inhaling his familiar scent. "God, please don't take Harm away from me," she whispered. Then she buried her face in the pillow and let the tears come.
Sergei could hear Sarah's muffled sobs. He let her cry, knowing she needed that release. When the coffee was made, he went to her. "Sarah?"
She looked up and met his compassionate gaze. She saw the same dread reflected in his eyes that was squeezing her heart.
"Sarah, the Admiral will be here soon," he reminded her.
"I'll be ready." She put down the pillow, climbed from the bed, and grabbed her clothes.
Sergei silently returned to the kitchen.
Twenty minutes later, Sarah had showered and dressed in her jeans and sweater from the previous night. Sergei thought her damp hair looked fresh and attractive. Sarah heard a light knock on the door as she descended the few steps from the bedroom and opened it. "Admiral, come in."
"Coffee, Admiral?" Sergei asked from the kitchen counter.
"No, thank you." A.J. Chegwidden sank down on one of the chairs in the living room.
He's aged ten years over night, Sarah thought sadly.
Sergei moved to join him, taking Sarah's hand and leading her to the couch across from A.J. They sat and he continued to hold her hand as they waited for the Admiral to tell them why he'd come.
"Sarah, Sergei. I'm sorry! Aerial reconnaissance photographs of the crash
site show that the explosion scattered debris from Harm's plane all over the
mountainside. They found no sign that he survived the crash. He has not made
contact. There was no automatic homing signal, which would support the theory
that the seat and Harm were still in the aircraft when it exploded." A.J.'s
voice broke. . . "Sarah, Tom Boone called to tell me that
they're now
considering classifying Harm as killed in action."
Sarah stared at the Admiral. "I don't believe it. That's not possible. I'm going there to search for him. I speak the language." She scrambled to her feet.
"Colonel," A.J. stood and faced her down, "You will stay here and serve your country. That's an order."
"Sir, he was like a son to you," Sarah sobbed.
"Mac, if I thought there was any chance Harm was alive, I'd be the first one in there, you know that! And because he was like a son, I'd never let you go, no matter how well you speak the language. You've seen the tapes from Afghanistan, how the fundamentalists treat women! Harm would haunt me if I let you do anything so stupid."
"Yes, sir," she answered meekly. "I won't give up hope though. I have to believe that Harm's alive!"
"Mac, you were the one who always pointed out to Harm that he was obsessed with the search for his father. Don't start your own obsession. It will only bring you grief."
"More than this, Admiral? I don't think so," she sank back down on the couch and sobbed. Sergei put his arm around her and held her as she cried on his shoulder.
"Tom Boone is flying back with Clay. He wants to meet with all of us Monday morning. Sarah, you'll have as much leave time as you need to deal with this," A.J. said gently.
"I'll be in as usual on Monday. What else is there to do?" She looked the Admiral in the eyes and read his agreement.
"Mac. Sergei. I'll call you later," A.J. rose to leave.
Sarah stood and escorted him to the door. "Thank you, sir."
A.J. reached out and touched her cheek; "I'll see you Monday." He walked out the door, closing it behind himself, then slumped against the wall, weak with grief thinking, Sarah was right, Harm was like the son I never had.
Sarah leaned her head against the closed door, the pain tearing her apart.
"Sergei, I have to be alone for a while. I'll be back later." Sarah grabbed her
car keys and her leather jacket and hurried out the door before he could stop
her. She raced past the Admiral without even seeing him. At first she just drove
in her red corvette, remembering the look on Harm's face when she'd bought it
after giving him such a hard time about the need
he had for his.
Later, she stopped at Arlington National Cemetery. She parked and walked for hours through rows and rows of neat white markers. Harm, like his father, will never even have this. The thought brought such pain; she sank to the ground and sobbed against the closest marker.
Without even being aware of where she was going, she ended up at The Wall.
1530 local time Iran (730 local time DC)
Harm didn't know how far they'd walked, but it felt like a million miles. His head throbbed and every step jarred his injured ribs.
"We're going to rest here for a few hours. We'll move on to my grandparent's village after midnight." Sam led Harm into an abandoned house. Once inside, Sam approached an empty cupboard and moved it away from the wall. In an alcove behind it was a box of medical supplies. "I have little caches scattered throughout the hills. I can't carry everything I might need with me at all times over this terrain."
"You're a very resourceful guy. You must be a great help to the people of this region." As he spoke, Harm rubbed his hand over his eyes.
"There's a crude bed in the next room. Lie down while I get some water and find the materials I need. I want to clean your head wound and stitch it, then I'll check you over for other injuries.
"Thank you," Harm sighed as he headed for the bed. The events of the past few days had taken their toll.
1400 local time DC The Vietnam Veteran's Memorial
Sarah had no trouble locating the correct panel. She'd accompanied Harm to The Wall when they returned from Russia. She found Harmon Rabb's name and traced it with one finger. "Take good care of him. Tell him I love him." Sarah leaned her head against the cold black marble and wept.
Sergei approached the memorial. He knew Harm made trips there to visit their father. It was where he and Webb had waited for Harm on Christmas Eve. He saw Sarah trace his father's name, Harm's name, and dissolve in tears. He stayed back to give her privacy, and only when he saw her stand back, did he approach her.
"What are you doing here?" she asked when she saw him.
"The same thing you are, asking my father for help and comfort," he responded.
"I'll go and give you some privacy," she offered.
"No, Sarah. Would you take a walk with me?"
"I'd like that," she answered softly. They fell into step and headed toward the Lincoln Memorial, then past the Korean War Memorial, and along the Potomac, past the ball diamonds and polo grounds, quiet during the cold months. Daffodils were just starting to bloom along the grassy banks of the river. Neither said a word, but each was grateful for the company and support of the other.
Finally, Sergei broke the silence, "I just can't believe Harm is dead."
"I know what I saw in my nightmare, and what they're telling me happened, but my heart just won't accept it." Sarah looked at Sergei, a plea in her eyes, "but is it because he's alive, or because I'm in denial."
"I don't know, Sarah. I feel the same way." Sergei walked Sarah back to her car. "Sarah, pack a bag and stay with me. You shouldn't be alone at a time like this."
"I shouldn't," Sarah started, and then thought about the night she'd spent in Harm's bed and how close she felt to him there. "But, you're right. I really don't want to be alone."
"Stop by your apartment and get what you need. I'll pick up some groceries on the way home and start dinner."
2300 local time Iran (1500 DC)
Sam had cleaned the wound on Harm's head and taken four stitches, all without the benefit of anesthetic. He'd rewrapped Harm's ribs; sure that at least three were broken, but he hadn't found any other wound more serious than scratches and the bruises that seemed to cover most of Harm's body.
"Commander, wake up. Can you travel now?"
"I'm a naval aviator, ready for anything," Harm said with bravado, then grimaced when he tried to sit, "but I could use a hand." He chuckled at the irony and then groaned from the pain it causes as it jarred his injured ribs. Harm stood and moved about the room, his whole body aching.
They set off from the old house. Sam knew the path well and set a brisk pace, but made sure that Harm was staying with him. They only talked if necessary since sound traveled further at night. Both men were alert for any signs of danger, and they made it to the small village without incident just before sunrise.
Sam's grandmother fed Harm and gave him a clean, comfortable bed. His eyes were drifting shut before he'd even settled in the bed. "I'm coming home, Sarah," he sighed as he drifted off to sleep.
Saturday 2215 DC Harm's apartment (0615 Sunday Iran)
Sarah had showered, dressed in another of Harm's shirts, crawled in his bed, and was looking at the picture she'd brought from her apartment when she heard his voice as clearly as if he were next to her in bed.
"I'm coming home, Sarah."
"Oh, my God! Harm!" Sarah gasped as tears trickled down her cheek. "Harm!" He must be alive, she thought hopefully.
"Sarah, are you all right?" Sergei sprinted across the apartment to her side and switched on the light.
"Sergei, I heard him call to me," she blurted. "He said he was coming home. He's not dead. I just know it!" Sarah smiled weakly at Harm's little brother.
Sergei was worried about her. He wanted to believe it, but was she setting herself up for more pain and suffering? "Good, Sarah. I'm happy, but are you sure?"
"I just feel it, Sergei." Sarah picked up Harm's pillow and hugged it. "Harm, come home to me," she whispered as Sergei turned out the light and left the room. Sarah lay down with the pillow clutched to her breast, hope flowing through her body with each beat of her heart.
0600 Sunday local time DC Harm's apartment
Sarah woke, refreshed from a good night's sleep. She slipped out of bed, put on Marine sweat pants, Harm's Navy tee shirt, and found his hooded sweatshirt. Harm, what would you say if you caught me wearing your clothes? she wondered.
Sergei was just waking as Sarah headed for the door. "Wait for me. Harm wouldn't want you to go jogging in this neighborhood alone."
"Hurry up!" she ordered.
Sergei quickly dressed and they ran for almost an hour. "I'll take you out for a real breakfast and then we can go to church to pray that God will speed Harm home," Sarah suggested as Sergei unlocked the door.
"Sounds good. You can have the bathroom first."
Sarah bounded up the stairs, and a few minutes later Sergei heard the shower. He poured himself some juice and sat deep in thought. He wanted to believe Sarah's psychic premonitions, but what would happen to her if she was wrong and Harm never returned?
"Your turn," Sarah told him as she headed to the refrigerator for her own glass of juice. She was dressed in a denim skirt and a yellow sweater. Her damp hair added to the youthful air she projected. Sergei envied his brother, having the love of a woman like Sarah. He rose and went to dress for church.
Sarah opened the paper they'd found by the front door and gasped. There on the front page was a picture of a man in Arab clothing holding a charred scrap of leather with an insignia from an American Naval flight jacket, dog tags, and a blood stained helmet with the call name "Hammer" painted on it. In the background, were small twisted and burned pieces of an aircraft. The headline read: Al Queda Downs US Plane. Sarah read the article, which listed both the terrorist assertions and the official Navy story outlining the rescue of an unnamed American State Department official. It included "the heroic actions" of Navy Commander Harmon Rabb Jr., even telling how his father was still listed as MIA from the Vietnam Conflict.
When Sergei found Sarah, she was staring at the picture. She handed him the paper. "How can they have his dog tags if he's still alive?" She walked to the bed, sat on its edge, and stared at Harm's picture. "What do I believe?" she sighed in anguish.
"Sarah, we can skip breakfast, I'm not hungry anymore, but let's go to church. That is still a good idea," Sergei urged.
"You're right." She rose and, united in their grief, they left the apartment.
1700 Sunday Local time Iran ( 0800 Sunday DC)
Harm woke, more clear-headed and refreshed than that morning. His body still ached, but wasn't as stiff. He carefully levered himself up with his uninjured side and swung his legs over the edge of the bed. He needed to talk to Sam, to find out what their next move would be. Harm didn't like a passive role. He wanted to at least be in on the plans. He needed to get home and have a serious conversation with a stubborn, beautiful Marine. No matter what, he wasn't wasting any more time that he could be spending with the woman he'd loved since the moment he'd met her. He would convince her of that!
1330 Sunday Local time DC (2130 Iran)
After lunch, Sara had driven to Bud and Harriet's to see little A.J. Being with her godson always cheered her up. They'd gone across the street to the park and played on the swings and slides. It was a beautiful, unseasonably warm day and A.J. was having a great time. "Where's Uncle Harm? He always plays catch with me," A.J. asked in his innocent little boy voice.
"He went away to fly his airplane, sweetheart," Sarah explained, a catch in her voice.
"Zoom!" A.J. yelled, holding out his arms and running around. Bud approached Sarah as, with tears running unheeded down her face, she watched A.J.
I'll never have a child of my own who wants to grow up in Harm's image, she silently grieved. I'll never have the baby he promised me three years ago.
"Sarah, are you okay?" he asked softly.
"No, Bud. Nothing will ever be right again!" Sarah brushed away the tears. "A.J., it's time to go in for your nap," she called. He ran to her and she gathered him up in her arms as they gave each other a big hug.
Bud took A.J. from Sarah when her cell phone began ringing. She pulled it out and answered, "Sarah Mackenzie."
"Mac, it's Clayton Webb." He paused and continued hesitantly, "I need to talk to you, Sarah. I'm at Bethesda. Would you come to see me? Please!" His voice was weak and full of pain.
"Clay, of course I'll come see you. I'll be there in about an hour." Sarah assured him.
"Thank you, Sarah," he said softly and hung up.
Sarah looked at Bud. "He blames himself. I can hear it in his voice."
"Yes, ma'am," Bud agreed.
"It's not his fault, Bud. If Harm had died when those MiGs shot us down in Russia, or on the Hornet when Clay didn't tell us the Russians were looking for that book of POW's, or on the freighter when Clay was playing dead, I'd have blamed him, but not for this!" Sarah sighed. "Not for this!"
"I'm going to see him. Tell Harriet, I'm feeling much better. A.J. was the best medicine in the world for me." Sarah smiled sadly at her friend.
"Take care, Sarah," Bud said sincerely.
Sarah knew how concerned he must be to use her given name. "I will. Bud, Thank you," she answered, walking to her car.
Sarah drove straight to Bethesda and quickly located Clay's room. She knocked softly and entered, but stopped short at the sight of Clayton Webb. She wouldn't have recognized him. His face was black, blue, and swollen, with numerous cuts. One leg was in a cast and one arm bandaged heavily. An IV tube ran from his other hand.
Clay was awake, waiting for her. "Sarah, I'm sorry," Clay's voice broke. There was a haunted look in the eyes that met hers.
Sarah Mackenzie crossed the room and grasped his hand. "Clay, don't! It's not your fault. I don't blame you, and Harm certainly wouldn't!"
A tear slipped down Clay's cheek, across a cut and Sarah caught it with her thumb as she caressed his face. Tears were so out of character for this man who usually was immune to emotional appeals and rarely showed any emotion of his own. Sarah knew how strongly Clay's friendship for Harm must have grown. "Clay, you're our friend. We'd do anything for you."
"Sarah, if there were any way to bring him back. . " his voice broke again.
"I know, Clay. I know!" she hugged him, careful not to hurt him.
"Thank you," he whispered.
"If you need anything, just ask," Sarah assured him. "Now, rest peacefully and get better. We need you, Clay. We need you and your talents, in this war, more than ever!" Sarah kissed him on the cheek and turned to go, only then seeing Clay's mother standing just inside the door.
Mrs. Webb stepped into the hall with Sarah. "Thank you, Colonel Mackenzie."
"Mac, please. I meant every word, Mrs. Webb. Clayton's a good friend. Harm would be
pleased that the rescue was successful."
"Mac, Clay's told me how close you and Commander Rabb were, I know how much this
cost you. I'm here for you if you need anything."
"Thank you, Mrs. Webb." Sarah hugged Clay's mother, then turned and left before she broke into tears. She didn't know how she'd survive the emotional roller coaster on which she seemed to be trapped.
0030 Monday local time Iran
Harm was hidden under the floor of a truck heading for the coast. Once they got to Kangan, Sam would reach his contacts who could get word to Clay and a pick up at sea would be arranged.
Harm couldn't help remembering hiding in the gypsy wagon, attempting to travel across Russia undetected. But that time, he'd had Mac beside him. He could see her, clear as day, dressed in gypsy attire. She'd been a knockout. Of course, Mac looks great in anything, he thought remembering her in evening attire at the numerous State occasions they'd attended together and in that sexy white nightgown she'd worn in Russia when they had to share the hotel room. Did she do that on purpose? he wondered. His mind
wandered as he tried to picture how she'd look next to him in bed, making
love, in
the shower. He shifted uncomfortably - - with his mind going there,
a cold shower was what he needed.
"Sarah, I'm coming home. Don't give up on me. I love you!" he whispered.
1800 Sunday Local time DC Harm's apartment
Sarah knocked and when there was no answer, used the spare key Harm had given her. She hung up her jacket and went to the refrigerator for a mineral water. She took several sips, then went up to lie down. She was exhausted from the tug of war between her heart, which screamed Harm had to be alive, and her brain, which told her he'd died, and she needed to accept that she'd lost him for good this time.
Sarah picked up the picture of Harm she'd brought from her own apartment, and remembered the times he'd taken her flying in Sarah. She'd been so upset with him that first time when he'd risked their lives by passing up what she considered a perfectly good clearing in hopes of finding one big enough for a take off. It didn't take very many trips in the biplane for her to get as hooked on her as Harm was. Generally, she'd just as soon leave planes alone, but flying in Sarah with Harm was special.
"Sarah, I'm coming home. Don't give up on me. I love you."
She glanced quickly around the room, so sure she'd heard him right beside her. It's not a memory, he's never told me he loves me, she thought. Sarah sighed and closed her eyes, then saw him. He was wrapped in white, and in a dark space, like a box. A casket? She screamed and opened her eyes.
The door burst open and Sergei ran to her side. "Are you okay?"
Sarah's voice shook, "I heard Harm again. He told me he was coming home, not to give up. He said he loved me. When I closed my eyes, I saw him wrapped in white, in a dark box. Maybe a casket." Tears ran down Sarah's face.
Sergei sat down and put his arms around her. "Tomorrow we'll see Admiral Boone. Maybe he'll be able to help us come to terms with what happened."
Mac nodded solemnly. She was afraid she was loosing her mind.
"I made some potato soup. Would you like some?" he asked.
"Sounds lovely," she said, but Sergei soon saw that Sarah was just humoring him. She had no appetite and by seven o'clock, Sarah had laid down on Harm's bed and was asleep on his pillow.
0600 Monday local time Iran (2200 Sunday DC)
Harm felt the truck jerk to a stop and heard Sam get out and slam the door. He tensed when he heard him talking to someone else. A few minutes later, Sam opened the hidden compartment and Harm scrambled out as fast as his broken ribs would allow.
"Thank God, fresh air!" he exclaimed.
"Harm, this is another friend of Clay's. He owns a boat that travels out of Kangan. He will signal our contact in the agency and drop a message for Clay. This is my clinic. You will need to stay hidden here until arrangements are made for your transfer to a US ship."
"How long will that take? My mother and friends will be frantic." Harm couldn't stand
the thought of what Trish and Mac were going through.
"Soon, my friend. Soon!" Sam assured him. "Right now, I'd like to check you over again and give you some antibiotics to prevent infection in your wounds."
"Lead on. If I could survive your stitches, surely I can live through an exam," Harm laughed. He was beginning to believe that he'd actually make it home.
0600 Monday Local time DC (1400 Monday Iran)
Sergei walked to Harm's bedroom to wake Sarah. He paused, gazing at her. The way she nestled her head on the right side of the pillow, with her left arm and leg draped across it, made him picture the way she would have snuggled up to his brother if they'd ever slept together.
"Sarah," he called softly. "Time to get up. I'm going for a run."
Sarah rolled over and smiled at him. "Thanks. I'll probably be dressed and gone before you get back. I'll see you at JAG later."
"Later," he agreed, then headed out for his run. This is going to be another difficult day, he predicted.
0720 Monday Local time DC JAG Headquarters (1520 Monday Iran)
Colonel Sarah Mackenzie braced herself as the elevator doors opened on their floor. She walked out, shoulders set in her best tough Marine facade, and strode purposefully across the bullpen toward her office. Only a few people were at work this early and no one spoke to her, but she could see sympathy in their eyes. Oh God, this is going to be even harder than I thought. She sat down at her desk, her gaze automatically straying to Harm's office out of habit. Silent tears streamed down her face. Why fight it? she thought as she stood.
Bud and Harriet, who'd just stepped off the elevator, saw Sarah enter Harm's office and shut the door. Bud squeezed his wife's hand, aware that her heart ached for Sarah's pain.
A.J. Chegwidden stood in his doorway, surveyed the solemn scene, and sadly shook his head. JAG would never be the same without the cocky pilot turned lawyer. Harm not only set a standard of legal excellence and loyalty, but a spirit of lighthearted fun as well. He would be sorely missed.
Sarah sank into Harm's chair and let her eyes roam around his office, loosing track of time as she remembered the good and not so good times they'd shared in that very room. They'd worked on cases together and vehemently argued those on which they presented opposing sides. She'd tried to convince Harm not to leave JAG, and had been heart broken when he did. They'd argued philosophical issues and helped each other through more personal problems than she could count. About the only thing they hadn't been able to share was the way they truly felt about each other.
Sarah remembered the night of her engagement party, the closest they'd ever come to sharing their feelings. He'd told her she had someone who would always love her, and when he'd looked into her eyes, she'd known deep down that marrying Mic wasn't right, but she'd been so stubborn. The kiss they shared that night had been even more wonderful than she'd always imagined, and it had scared her.
Sarah thought back to the quick breakfast they'd shared before she left for Norfolk on Wednesday. What was the last thing I said to Harm? It couldn't be as awful as the way we said goodbye last spring before he went down at sea. I didn't wish him luck then, and he almost died. What would I have said Wednesday, if I'd known he was going on a mission during wartime? Would I have told him that I love him and need him?
Sarah ran her hands over Harm's desk, picking up his letter opener and absently fingering it. She noticed a post-it-note stuck to his computer, Ask Sarah to go flying on Saturday!
"Oh, Harm!" she sighed as a fresh wave of tears coursed down her cheeks. She glanced up as the door opened. Trish and Frank Burnett stood in the doorway.
Sarah quickly stood. "I'm sorry, I'll. . ."
"Sarah, stay. You have every right to be here." Trish rounded Harm's desk and hugged Sarah. "I know how close the two of you have always been. I'd probably have lost Harm four years ago on his trip to Russia if you hadn't accompanied him on his quest for his father. You've always been there for my son."
"Mrs. Burnett, I love your son," Sarah stated simply.
"I know, dear, and he loved you." Trish smiled sadly and sighed, "You were both too proud, and too bound by your military codes." She shook her head at the absurdity of passing up love for any reason. Life was too unpredictable.
"I'll regret that the rest of my life," Sarah admitted.
Trish scanned the room, "I just wanted to see Harm's office, to try to get a feel for the last months of his life. I haven't seen him since he made a quick trip out to La Jolla last fall. That was when he told me how much he loved you, but was worried he'd blown his chance with you. He said you wouldn't even talk to him about it when he went to that ship in the Indian Ocean to see you. He was so upset. But when we talked at Christmas, he was optimistic that things might work out."
"I think they might have," Sarah said softly, "we just ran out of time."
Trish smiled weakly, tears glittering in her eyes.
"Mrs. Burnett. ."
"Please, Trish!"
"Trish, did Harm tell you about Sergei?" Sarah asked tentatively. She didn't want his presence later to come as a shock to Harm's mother.
"Yes, dear. He called me on Christmas Day to share his good news." Trish
turned toward the window and stared out, "When Harm flew to La Jolla just before
Christmas a year ago, I was so angry at the unfairness of life. And with Harm
for keeping Sergei a secret from me. Yet, how could I fault Harmon for loving
the woman that saved his life, especially after ten years of captivity? Besides,
I was married to Frank by then." Trish turned back to Mac, "Now, it's a blessing
for Sarah. Her son lives on in Sergei. Sarah and
Harm were so close; perhaps
meeting Sergei will help her get through this. She's a rock, but how can anyone
be expected to live through loosing a husband, a son, and now her grandson."
Trish broke down. "I guess I'm in the same position, I've lost any hope of a
grandson along with my son." Frank rounded the desk and pulled Trish into his
arms, cradling her against his body.
Sarah nodded to him in understanding and left the room, touching Harm's name on the door as she went out.
"Colonel, the Admiral would like to see you in his office," Tiner intercepted her as she approached her own office.
Sarah looked up at him blankly as her numbed mind processed what he'd just said. "Thank you, Tiner."
"Colonel, I'm so sorry about Commander Rabb."
"Thank you, Tiner." His understanding touched Sarah. She knocked and entered the Admiral's office.
"Colonel Mackenzie reporting as ordered, Sir." Mac stood at attention before the Admiral.'
"At ease, Colonel," he said gently. "Mac, how are you holding up?"
"Not very well, Sir," she answered truthfully.
"Mac, Admiral Boone will be here shortly. DNA tests on the blood that coated Harm's dog tags, helmet and the jacket fragment proved to be his. Tom notified us earlier that Harm has been declared dead." He saw her wince as if hit in the gut. "Tom specifically requested your presence along with Harm's family."
"I appreciate that, Admiral. I know how much Tom Boone meant to Harm and vice versa. I don't blame him and I will tell him so," Sarah assured A.J.
"Sarah, is there anything I can do for you?"
"No, Sir," she whispered.
A soft knock on the door ended their conversation. "Enter."
Tiner stepped into the room. "Sir, Admiral Boone, Harm's mother and stepfather, and Sergei are all in the conference room."
"We're on our way, Tiner." He dismissed his aide. "Colonel, we should join them."
"Yes, Sir," Sarah snapped off a salute and turned to go.
1900 Monday Local time Iran (1100 Monday DC)
Harm put down his plate. He'd just finished a meal of rice and yogurt, passing on the lamb. What I wouldn't give for some of Sarah's vegetarian lasagna and a salad. "Soon," he told himself.
Sam entered the small living quarters of his clinic. "You're looking better, my friend. The rest has helped?"
"I'm feeling much better," Harm assured him, "but I'm anxious to get home. Do we have any word on when that might happen?"
"Our contact has been informed that I have an asset who needs to be evacuated. He's a foreign aide worker. He's made arrangements to deliver medical supplies tomorrow at 0800 and when he leaves, he'll take you with him."
"Good. Will I be able to get a message out right away?" Harm wondered.
"Not before you get back to a US ship at the soonest. We can't risk it. Are you tired of our company?" Sam joked. "
I've got a Marine waiting for me in D.C. I need to get back there. I don't want her hurt. And my mother's been through this before with my father. I don't want her to suffer any longer than necessary."
Sam could hear the concern for the women in his life in Harm's voice. "We'll get you home, Commander," Sam promised. "Not that I want to be rid of you, but I'll feel a lot safer without your delightful company, too."
Harm laughed softly. His ribs just a dull ache now.
1030 Monday JAG Headquarters, Falls Church
Sarah and A.J. entered the conference room together. Sarah saluted Admiral Tom Boone.
"At ease, Colonel," he directed. "Sarah, I'm sorry about Harm. I know how close the two of you were."
"Thank you, Admiral. I know he meant a great deal to you too, and you feel his loss as well."
Sarah had noticed Trish hugging Sergei when she walked in. She smiled at both of them. Harm would be so pleased, she mused.
"Sit down, please." Admiral Boone waited until everyone complied. "I asked you all here so that I could tell you personally that Harm died as he lived, with honor, integrity, and an unselfish love for his fellow man. I know nothing I say can diminish your grief, but know that Harm was doing what he loved: flying and serving his country."
Tom Boone cleared his throat, "Trish, Sarah, Harm flew this mission because
of me. I told him about our attempt to rescue his friend, Clayton Webb, knowing
that he'd want to take part. When he asked to go, I cleared the way. I'm
responsible for Harm flying into danger. Harm was an amazing pilot. He'd already
helped take out a terrorist camp and had destroyed an artillery and missile site
that hit his wing man, when three MiGs attacked.
Harm had sent Keeter back to
the carrier and was outnumbered. He quickly shot down two of the MiGs with
incredible flying, but by then he'd used up all his missiles and counter
measures. They'd scrambled more planes from the ship, but they couldn't make it
in time to help. Harm engaged the final MiG with only a few rounds of ammunition
in his guns. He saved over twenty men and three aircraft by downing that last
plane before he was hit by its missle." Tom met Trish Burnett's eyes, "Trish, I
know this is little
consolation, but I've put in paperwork for a Silver Star
for Harm and even recommended him for the Congressional Medal. What he did was
brave and unselfish. He served in the highest possible tradition of the United
States Military."
"Tom, thank you, for contacting us personally," Trish smiled at her husband's best friend. "Harm looked up to you on so many levels and Harmon would have been grateful for all you've done for his son."
"Trish, Hammer was like my brother, and Harm was so like him. They shared the same sense of honor, duty, and humanity. I mourn with you once again."
"Friday evening, I found Harm up on deck watching a squadron launch and head
out for Afghanistan. He was thrilled to be flying another mission, determined to
help save a friend. But I could tell that he was having other thoughts too.
Later, just before the mission, he came to my cabin and we talked again. He
brought me these," the Admiral held up four envelopes. "He told me he loved
flying, but knew he loved JAG every bit as much! He said he was glad he'd had
the opportunity to help so many people. He was looking forward to completing the
mission and heading back to 'his world,' as he put
it." Tom Boone looked at
A.J. and Harm's family. "He loved all of you very much. He said the letters were
'just in case'. He didn't want to let anything go unsaid."
"Tom, thank you for arranging to hold the memorial service for Harm at the Naval Academy." Trish rose and went to the man who'd been one of the last people both her husband and son had been with in life. She hugged him and kissed his cheek.
Tom Boone returned her embrace. "I'll see you at your hotel later to finalize details." He handed her one of the envelopes.
"Sarah," Trish turned to Mac. "Please join us for dinner tonight."
Sarah nodded, lost for words.
"Sergei, please bring Sarah with you."
"Yes, Mrs. Burnett. Thank you," he answered shyly.
"Admiral Chegwidden, Harm thought so much of you. Thank you for
agreeing
to eulogize him."
"Mrs. Burnett, I deeply share your loss. I am honored to do so." A.J. could barely speak.
Trish took her husband's hand and they left to spend time alone with their son.
"Sergei, Harm was delighted to have a brother. One of the reasons he was so insistent about helping on this mission was gratitude for Clay's efforts to free you and bring you to America."
"Thank you, sir." Sergei took the envelope the Admiral handed him.
"I'll see you later, Sarah." She nodded and touched his hand as he left.
"Sarah," Tom Boone had no idea what to say to her, so he just handed her one of the envelopes. "Semper Fi, Colonel."
Sarah took the envelope, the lump of unshed tears in her throat prevented any response. She nodded and hurried from the room.
Tom Boone watched her go. "Will she be okay, A.J.?"
"Will any of us?" A.J. responded.
Tom Boone gave the last envelope to A.J. "I'll talk to you later," he said before leaving him alone in the huge conference room.
"Damn, Harm. I thought you were indestructible!" A.J. sank down into his chair and opened the envelope.
Admiral,
I know you're thinking he's done it again - run off to his first love! Flying was my first love Admiral, and I'll always love it; but the law has become my life. It's been a great life!
If you're reading this, something went terribly wrong and I didn't make it. Please know that I have always respected you and am grateful for everything you did for me. I know I wasn't the easiest person in your command, but you always had faith in me. I'm eternally grateful.
Admiral, I've left so many things undone, unspoken. Mac will be devastated. I'm one more man in her life who left her. Please take care of her. Help her to know I'd never willingly hurt her.
Sir, you have been very special to me. I'm sorry if I let you down by going on this mission.
Harm
A.J wiped the tears from his eyes. "You too, son. You were special too."
Sarah Mackenzie walked slowly from the conference room to her office, the envelope clasped to her chest. She was oblivious to the staff watching, the pity in their eyes. Sarah closed the door and sat down at her desk. She opened the envelope and removed a sheet of paper and a cassette tape. Slowly she unfolded the letter.
Sarah,
I leave for this mission firmly resolved to return to you and have the conversation we should have had months ago, but if you receive this letter, fate has denied me what I foolishly denied myself for way too long. Sarah, please give me the opportunity to tell you how I feel.
Harm
Tears streamed down Sarah's cheeks as she put the tape into the cassette player on the credenza behind her desk. Her hands trembled as she pushed the play button and heard his warm familiar voice.
Sarah, I'm sitting here on my bunk, the sounds of the carrier all around me. Once upon a time, this was all I wanted. But I've known for a long time now that what I need to make me truly happy, truly complete, is something very different.
As I prepare for this mission, I'm scared. Not of dying, I've always known that was possible. I'm scared of never having the chance to tell you how much I love you. To never have held you in my arms and made love to you. I've loved you since the first time I saw you in The Rose Garden. Of course, it took a little while to realize it, longer still to admit it, and I guess, too long to actually tell you in person.
Sarah, I was such a fool! You took me by surprise that night in Australia. If
only I had that day back to live over! I'd take you in my arms and never let you
go. If only I'd done that. We might even have a beautiful child or two. I don't
want to wait to the end of five years to have a baby with you, or to do it
because neither of us is with someone else. I want to have children with you
because I love you. You've always brought out the best in
me!
Sarah, I'll always love you. In you I found my soul mate and I'm so sorry I took you for granted. You are the best thing that ever happened to me. I hope that you know that I love you. I'm pretty sure you love me too.
More than anything else on earth, I wanted to ask you if you would do me the honor of marrying me, but, if you hear this tape, fate didn't cooperate. Sarah, I will love you through all eternity. I want you to be happy. I hope you find someone deserving of your love.
I'll be with you always, my darling Sarah.
I love you!
"Oh, Harm! I do love you." Sarah sobbed softly, rewinding the tape to hear the sound of his voice again. To hear the words she'd waited a lifetime to hear him profess. As she listened, she saw his sexy flyboy smile, and relived the kiss he'd given her on the porch the night of her engagement party.
1300 Local time DC (2100 Iran)
"Trish, honey, are you going to open Harm's letter?" Frank asked softly as he wrapped his arms around his wife.
"Frank, I don't know if I can. I went through this once with my husband, now Harm! How could this happen twice?" Trish turned in her husband's arms and rested her cheek against his shoulder.
Frank kissed her temple and stroked her hair. Sweetheart, whenever you're ready. We'll save it and someday it will be time."
"Honey, did you see how Harm addressed it?" Trish choked.
"No," he answered hesitantly.
Trish walked across the hotel suite and picked up the envelope from the fireplace mantel. She turned to face Frank who had followed her and handed it to him. Frank stared at the envelope: "Mom and Dad." He looked back to Trish and a single tear escaped and trickled down his cheek.
"You deserve to hear this one. We can listen to it now, if you promise to hold me," she smiled sadly.
"Honey, always!" he answered.
They sat down on the sofa by the fireplace and Frank opened the envelope. He removed the letter and a tape. "You read it," Trish requested.
Mom & Dad,
If you receive this letter something went wrong today. I only hope I've made a difference before that happened. I'm not afraid of dying if it's God's will - I just don't want to leave without saying good-bye.
Harm
Frank squeezed his wife's shoulders. "Can you handle the tape?" Trish nodded silently, so Frank slipped the tape in a boom box he'd borrowed earlier from the hotel. He pushed the play button and hugged Trish to his side.
Mom and Dad, I want you to know how sorry I am for causing you pain. I guess we all knew that someday I might not come back from a mission. It goes with the territory and I've given you a couple of scares already. Please know that I love flying - there are worse ways to die than doing what you love. I'm sorry for leaving so many things unsaid.
Frank, I do love you. You've been a wonderful father and I was a headstrong, selfish kid who'd put his birth father on a pedestal. I should have been a better son! Please know that I never resented you in Mom's life - I'm grateful that you love her and make her happy and found a place in your heart for me. Please take good care of mom.
Mom, I know I wasn't always easy and I must have hurt you by constantly searching for dad. It was something I needed. I loved my father and he shaped the course of my life. You helped me to become the person I was by making sure I knew him, by providing a second father with equally strong character and values, and with your unconditional love.
I'm so sorry that I never got my act together and started a family. This might be easier for you if I'd left behind some grandchildren for you to shower with love.
I want you to know that I did find love, I just wasn't smart enough and courageous enough to let Sarah know how I felt. But I knew her love through all the sacrifices she made for me. Mac will take my death hard - love her for me, like the daughter she'd have been if I'd made it back.
Mom, just as I know what you and Frank have was right, I know that for Dad to have been loved before he died was also right. I know he always wanted to come home to us and I believe eventually, he would have found a way. Mom, please love Sergei, help him to get his citizenship and start a new life here. For me!
I love you mom and dad. Good-bye.
Trish and Frank clung to each other, their tears intermingled.
1700 Local time DC Harm's apartment ( 0200 Tuesday Iran)
Sarah let herself into Harm's apartment. She hung up her coat and slipped off her shoes, then walked to the bedroom. Sitting on the edge of the bed, she closed her eyes and hugged Harm's pillow, inhaling the little bit of his scent it still contained. It was fading.
Sarah saw Harm standing by an open window gazing up at the stars. He was dressed in a white robe. "Sarah, soon. I'll be there soon."
Her eyes flew open and she looked around the room. She was alone.
2200 Monday Local time DC Harm's apartment (0700 Tuesday Iran)
Sergei opened the door and Sarah entered the apartment ahead of him. "I need to move back home. I can't stay here forever. You're moving into your new apartment tomorrow as scheduled. Trish and Frank will want to settle Harm's affairs before they fly back to La Jolla."
"Wait until after the memorial service," Sergei urged. "Trish didn't mind that you were staying here and I'm sure Harm would want it."
Sergei shook his head, "Trish is a wonderful woman. I'm overwhelmed that she and Frank have welcomed me into their family. Most women wouldn't show such warmth to the son her husband fathered with another woman."
"Harm's mother couldn't be anything less than amazing to raise a son with the compassion for others that has always made Harm stand out from other people," Sarah smiled remembering some of the many people Harm had taken under his wing. He'd made so many lives better. Including mine, she thought.
"I better turn in. I have a lot of work to do tomorrow. I have to sort through Harm's case load, see what needs to be done to close out the last cases on which he worked, and decide how to redistribute the pending ones."
"Are you sure you're up to it? Maybe it's too soon," he suggested gently.
"I'll be okay. I'll be helping him." she answered softly.
"Goodnight, Sarah. I'll see you tomorrow." Sergei kissed her softly on the cheek. It would have been great having you for a sister."
"You'll always have me for a friend," she smiled at him and retreated to the bedroom.
Sarah slipped into one of Harm's shirts, then put his tape in a portable player and laid down in bed. She closed her eyes and listened to his words of love.
0750 Tuesday Local time Iran (2350 Monday local time DC)
Harm paced restlessly. Patience wasn't exactly his strongest virtue. He was anxious to get underway. There was a beautiful Marine he wanted desperately to hold in his arms.
The medical supply truck pulled up to Sam's clinic at exactly 0800. Harm, the white robe hiding his uniform, watched from the back room as a middle aged man of European descent entered the outer room.
"Commander, you can come out," Sam called. "Harmon Rabb, this is Tom Spencer. He's been working for a European medical agency for the past ten years. He's known Clay for about five."
"Nice to meet you," Harm assured him. "I'm rather anxious to reach a US ship or base. My family will think I was killed when my plane exploded."
"You will return with me to my boat and we'll make our regularly scheduled supply run to Dhahran. A US Navy patrol will stop us for an inspection and you will go aboard. They will transfer you ASAP to a carrier or airbase that can arrange a flight back to the States." Tom Spencer informed him of their plans.
"Sounds great! When do we go?" Harm couldn't keep the enthusiasm out of his voice.
"Is now soon enough? " Tom Spencer asked with a laugh. "We need to finish unloading the supplies, and then we're on our way." He enjoyed the grin that lit up Harm's face.
1100 Tuesday Local time Persian Gulf (0300 Tuesday DC)
US naval personnel boarded the small boat and approached the wheelhouse. The Lieutenant in command saluted the aviator waiting for them, "Commander, we heard you needed a lift."
"I sure would appreciate it," Harm smiled grateful to everyone who'd helped to smuggle him out of Iran.
One of the seamen approached the Lieutenant, "Inspection complete, sir. No contraband on board."
"Prepare to return to the ship." He turned to Harm, "Shall we, Commander?"
"Aye, aye," Harm agreed enthusiastically. He extended his hand to Tom Spencer, "Thank you."
"My pleasure. Tell Clay he owes me."
"Will do - - God's speed!"
Harm returned to the naval vessel with the boarding party. "Permission to come aboard, Sir," he addressed the Captain.
"Welcome aboard, Commander. We have a Sea Hawk set to transport you back to the carrier, where they're holding a plane to fly you to Gibraltar and a hop back to Andrews. Seems you have friends in high places." The Captain started walking Harm to the helicopter pad.
"Thank you for your part in getting me home."
"Glad to help, Commander. We heard about how you and Keeter took out the Al Queda camps and then how you fought off three MiGs to protect the rescue force. We're just glad the rumors that you went down with your Tomcat were wrong."
They reached the helicopter, and moments later, Harm was on his way back to the carrier.
1230 Local time Persian Gulf (0430 DC)
Harm scanned the horizon as the Sea Hawk soared across the calm waters of the
Gulf. He spotted the carrier, a mere speck in the distance, growing larger every
second. Funny, he thought, the thrill of seeing a carrier never goes away.
Sometimes, like right now, I feel relief, sometimes anxiety, I've even felt out
and out terror, but always there is a
thrill!
When they were still a few miles, out, Harm watched as four Tomcats launched and grouped for a bombing run over Afghanistan. The fighter pilot part of him wanted to climb right back in the cockpit of an F-14 and join them, but right now, the sensitive, concerned son and friend part of him was anxious to climb on the first plane stateside. I have to get home to see mom and Sarah.
The instant the helicopter landed on board the carrier deck, Harm hopped out. Keeter ran over to him and they clasped hands, "Good to see you, Hammer!"
"You too! You too!" Harm smiled broadly. "I didn't think I'd make it."
"You had some guardian angel man!" Keeter shook his head in wonder. "Why no homing beacon or contact? We thought you'd gone down with the plane."
"I don't even remember ejecting, just the fireball below me as I shot out of
the cockpit. One of Webb's intelligence assets just happened to be in the right
place to see me come down. I hit a rock ledge and was unconscious. He went to
great lengths to make the opposition believe I was dead so they wouldn't come
looking for me. He knew another rescue force couldn't get in and out before I
was caught and executed or the terrorist
network had time to prepare to
ambush the helicopters."
"Thank goodness he was there." Jack Keeter smiled at his friend.
Harm looked around. "I need to get to the bridge and contact my family."
At that moment, Captain Carter joined them. Harm snapped to attention. "At ease, Commander. I'm sorry, I can't let you contact anyone at this time. Your rescue has to stay a secret for a while to protect those who helped you. We've been holding a COD for you. You need to hop on board. Try at Gibraltar. The blackout may be lifted by the time you get there."
Keeter handed Harm a fresh flight suit and some toiletries. "Somewhere along the line you might get a few minutes to clean up. Give your mom and Mac a kiss for me!" Jack slapped Harm on the back
"Thanks, Jack. Will do!"
They reached the plane and Harm saluted the captain. "You're welcome to fly with my crew anytime, Commander." Captain Carter returned the salute.
"Thank you, sir." Harm hopped on board and strapped in for the take
off.
1100 Tuesday Local time DC JAG Headquarters Falls Church, Virginia
Mac spent the morning sorting through the files in Harm's desk and now had three neat piles. One stack was closed cases, or cases that Harm had used for reference. She'd have Harriet file those. The pending cases would have to be reassigned. The last stack contained Harm's personal files. She set those aside and picked up three files she'd laid on his chair.
"Are you okay, Colonel?" She recognized the concerned voice of Lt. Simms and looked up.
"I'm holding up, Harriet. I have a stack of folders for you to file. I'll take the pendings to my office later and reassign them. I can't bring myself to pack Harm's personal belongings. It's just too soon."
"It can wait, Mac. Nobody needs the office immediately." Harriet as always was the voice of reason. "Would you like to go to lunch with me?" Harriet asked hopefully.
"I'm not hungry." Mac held up the files in her hand. "Harm had three cases that need to be closed out. I want to finish those this afternoon."
"You need to take care of yourself. You look like you've lost at least ten pounds in the past few days. Have you been eating and sleeping?" Harriet tried to reach her friend.
"I'll admit, I don't have much appetite, but I've been sleeping pretty well in Harm's bed. I feel his presence there. I dread going back to my apartment."
"Mac, you know I'll do anything I can for you. So will Bud."
"I know, Harriet. There's just not anything that anyone can do," Sarah replied softly, the pain of loss in her voice.
Harriet nodded sadly, and walked away to give Mac some privacy.
Mac carried the files to her office and set to work. Two hours later, she was just finishing up the last report when there was a soft knock on her door.
"Mac, can I come in?" Sturgis stood in the doorway, a look of utter fatigue and misery in his eyes.
"Sure. Have a seat. You look like you're going to collapse. I heard you won your case in Japan."
Commander Turner sank into the chair in front of Mac's desk. "Yeah, but I'm not so sure I should have." He shook is head, "I've been on a plane for most of the past twenty-four hours. I wanted to be here for the memorial service. Mac, I . ."
"I know!" His gentle voice triggered tears that ran down her face.
"Mac, I wish there was something I could do!" he said helplessly.
"Sturgis, Harm sent me a letter tape like the ones his father used to send to him and his mother from Vietnam. He told me that he loved me and wanted to marry me." She looked up into his sympathetic gaze. "For someone who always knows the exact time anywhere in the world, the timing in my life is terrible."
Sturgis stood and rounded the desk. He took the Marine Colonel in his arms and held her until her tears subsided. "Mac, why don't you go on home? You've just lost you best friend, the man you loved. You need to grieve, Mac. You can't go on like nothing happened."
"Okay, you're right. I've finished Harm's files anyway." She stood and looked around her office blankly.
"Come on, I'll walk you to your car." He escorted her out of the office, turned out her lights, and shut the door.
2200 Tuesday local time DC Harm's Apartment
Mac shut off the lights in the kitchen of Harm's apartment and approached the bedroom. Just as she reached it, she heard the phone. She screened the call by letting the machine pick it up.
"Mac, it's Clay. I need to talk to you. Please pick up."
Sarah grabbed the phone, "Clay, how'd you know I was here? Never mind, stupid question! How do you know anything?"
"Mac, I'm offended! You don't have a very good bedside manner. I'm laid up and you're insulting me."
"I'm sorry, Clay. Did you need something?" she asked resignedly.
"As a matter of fact, yes. I'm still being held captive in this hospital room, and I need someone to break me out. I have to meet a plane at Andrews in a few hours. Will you help me?"
"Clay, what's so important that you need to defy doctor's orders?" Sarah's exasperation came through loud and clear.
"Sarah, it's an important package from my Iranian contacts. It's critical that I am there and I need your help. Please!"
"Alright, Clay, but this better not get me court-martialed! I'll be right over." Sarah hung up the phone, grabbed her coat and keys, and headed out the door.
Clayton Webb smiled in delight. "Have I got a surprise for you, Colonel!"
2300 Local time Bethesda Naval Hospital
Sarah entered the hospital, showed her ID to the officials on duty and explained that she had to see Clayton Webb on official business. When she reached his room, he was dressed, in a wheel chair, and ready to go.
"I've signed myself out so you won't get court-martialed. Take me out the side entrance, there's a government car waiting for us."
"Us, Clay? If you have a car and driver, why do you need me?" Sarah knew she was being impatient, but she'd never had as much tolerance for Clayton Webb's intrigues as Harm had.
"For protection of course," he said seriously.
Sarah laughed out loud, she couldn't help it.
"Well you were pretty helpful on one other occasion . . .make that two . .three. . ."
"Enough! All right, Clay. I'll humor you. Let's go." Mac couldn't believe that she actually heard herself laughing. She grasped the handles of the wheelchair and they set off.
0230 Local time Andrews Air Force Base
They'd been at Andrews for over an hour when an Air Force Lieutenant approached Clay to tell him that the flight he was waiting for had just landed.
Mac stood to wheel Clay outside to meet the plane. She took the handles of the chair, but Clay reached up and laid his hand on hers. "Mac, thank you for bringing me here, but I changed my mind. I'm not going out. I don't want to intrude. You're the one who needs to go meet that plane." He grinned at her like the Cheshire Cat.
Mac stared at him, remembering his earlier words: It's an important package from my Iranian contacts. "Clay, is Harm . . ." She stopped, afraid to hope that what she was thinking could be true.
"Go to him, Mac!" he urged
She leaned down and kissed Clay on the cheek then ran out to the tarmac where the plane was just rolling to a stop. She watched as a ground crew secured the transport and the door opened.
A minute later, Commander Harmon Rabb Jr., in a fresh flight suit, stepped out and started to descend the stairs. His eyes were drawn to the figure waiting below. "Mac?" he called softly, not believing his eyes.
"Oh, Harm," the tears welling up in her eyes and trickling down her cheeks sparkled in the lights from the plane, as she slowly moved toward the ramp.
Harm raced down the remaining stairs and gathered her in his arms. "Oh God, Sarah! I didn't know if I'd ever see you again." He kissed her with all the passion that had been building for the past six years. "Sarah, I love you!" he choked out through his tears as he cradled her against his breast. He stroked her hair and kissed her temple.
"I love you too, Harm! I thought I'd lost you," she sobbed clinging to him.
"Oh, darling. I know. I'm so sorry you went through that." He wiped away her tears and gently hugged her to him again. They clung to each other, afraid to let go, lest it only be a dream.
Finally, Harm pulled back and looked into the big brown eyes he'd so longed to see. "How did you know I was on this plane?"
"I didn't until a minute ago, Clay conned me into breaking him out of the hospital, then when I got there he had a limo waiting and told me he wanted me along for protection."
Harm laughed, "I'll bet that went over well."
"You know me," Mac continued, "He was sorely testing my patience. He didn't tell me you were on the plane until it pulled up here."
"I owe him for bringing you to me!" Harm sighed contentedly and hugged her tighter.
"I heard that, Rabb," Clay called from just inside the waiting room door.
Harm took Mac's hand and they joined Clayton Webb.
"Commander, it's nice to see you alive and well," Clay said in his understated, matter of fact way. He couldn't hide his smile however.
"It's good to see you too." Harm reached out and shook Clayton Webb's hand. "Thank you for getting me out of Iran and home so quickly."
"My pleasure, Harm! You saved me back there, by making sure we got away from the MiGs. Returning the favor was the least I could do! But you had us all more than a little worried. I thought you'd gone through all nine of your lives."
"I can't thank you enough for bringing Mac here tonight." Harm hugged her to his side. "Does anyone else know I'm alive?"
"Not yet. I had to protect my assets and I really didn't want Mac or your mother to know until you were home safe. If anything had gone wrong, I didn't want the people who loved you to go through the pain of loosing you more than once." "
It's the middle of the night. I guess we can contact everyone else in the morning."
"Come on," Clay suggested. "Let's get you home."
Harm tucked Sarah's arm in his, then took the handles of the chair, and together they wheeled Clay to the limo.
0400 Wednesday DC
On the way into the city, Clay and Mac informed Harm about the memorial service planned for the next day.
"They have the Academy chapel booked for tomorrow afternoon? Who pulled that off?" Harm asked in astonishment.
"Admiral Boone and the Secnav," Mac responded.
"The Secnav was doing a favor for me? That's a miracle!" he laughed.
"I guess he didn't know how much he cared until he thought he'd lost you," Mac teased, then noticed Harm wasn't really listening, but was deep in thought. "Harm?"
His eyes refocused on her, "Do you think there's any chance we could get permission to make it a wedding instead of a funeral? Since the chapel's already spoken for and everything," he wondered aloud.
Mac looked at him in shock.
"I assumed that Tom Boone delivered my letters since everyone thought I was dead." He looked at her questioningly. She nodded. "Mac, I know this isn't the most romantic proposal, but I don't want to waste any more time." He took her hand in his. "Will you marry me, Sarah Mackenzie?" he asked softly.
"Oh, Harm. Yes!" she sighed, then kissed him to show him the depth of her love. Harm parted her lips and deepened the kiss, caressing her back and arms.
"Rabb, don't forget you're not alone," Clay reminded him dryly.
Harm broke the kiss and smiled at Webb. "Well, Clay, I'm assuming you were going to attend my funeral. Will you still show up at Annapolis tomorrow, for my wedding?"
"Wouldn't miss it," he grinned. "I've been waiting six years for this. Actually, I think I should take credit for this wedding. I'm the one that had Sarah assigned as your partner."
Harm smiled at him, a twinkle of mischief in his eyes.
The limousine pulled up outside Harm's apartment. Mac leaned over and kissed Clay. "Thank you for bringing this flyer back to me."
Clay blushed, "It's the least I could do for the two best friends I have."
Harm just nodded, words weren't necessary between them.
Harm and Mac watched the limousine pull away, then Harm put his arms around Mac and they went up to his apartment. As they neared the door, Harm suddenly stopped. "I just remembered, I don't have a key. Admiral Boone had already taken all my personal effects."
Mac pulled her key from her pocket. "I have one, remember." She unlocked the door; Harm opened it, turned on the light, and let her enter first. She took off her jacket, but dropped it on the floor as Harm closed the door and swept her into his embrace. His kiss made her forget everything else. When Harm finally broke the kiss, he asked her to wait right where shewas. . .
Harm crossed to his desk and, opening the center drawer, removed a key and unlocked the file drawer. He reached to the back and drew out a black velvet box. Returning to Sarah, he dropped to one knee. "I love you, Sarah Mackenzie. You are my soul mate, the only woman I'll ever love. Please tell me again that you'll marry me and be my love through all eternity."
"Yes, Harmon Rabb. Nothing in heaven or earth would make me happier." Her dazzling smile made his knees weak.
Harm opened the box and slipped a two caret, round diamond solitaire on her finger. Then he stood, gathered Sarah in his embrace, and kissed her the way he'd dreamed of for the last six years.
Tears of joy ran down both their faces. Sarah treasured the fact that Harm was so moved by the moment. "I've never been so happy," she whispered and kissed away his tears.
"Me either," Harm answered with a sense of contentment he'd never known before. He touched her cheek gently, reverently. "Sarah, do you think we can pull a wedding together before this afternoon?"
"I've waited my whole life for you. I'm not letting this opportunity slip by, " she smiled at him.
Harm knew he'd never seen Sarah happier, or more beautiful, but she'd been up almost all night. "You need some rest, and I feel an intense need to just hold you in my arms. Do you mind if we go to bed together for a few hours?" Harm wasn't sure how she'd feel about sharing his bed the morning of their wedding.
"Come on, Flyboy," she said, leading him to the bedroom, "I've been sleeping in your bed since your plane went down. It will be nice to hold onto you instead of your pillow." She laughed at his look of surprise.
"If I'd known I'd find you in my bed, I could've flown home without a plane." He gave her one of those devastating smiles that had driven her crazy for years.
"Sergei wouldn't let me go home and be alone after I came to tell him on Friday. Then I chose to stay here because I felt closer to you."
"Oh, Sweetheart. I'm sorry you were put through such emotional turmoil." Harm kissed her tenderly on the temple as he held her close.
Sarah gently touched Harms face, his bandages and bruises. "Are you really all right?"
"A few stitches, three broken ribs, and some bruises. Not bad for having a plane blow up under me." He saw her shudder, "Sarah, I'm sorry!" Harm pulled her against his chest. "All I could think of was the pain you and my mother would suffer."
"I know how much you love flying, but right now I'm glad you're a lawyer full time and only an aviator part time." She smiled weakly and gently caressed his cheek.
"Me too. I couldn't bear leaving you for months at a time." He pulled her tightly into his embrace.
"Really, Harm?" Sarah asked incredulously.
"Really!" he answered vehemently, kissing her on the tip of her nose. "Come on, you need some rest." Harm led her to his bed.
"Alright, Flyboy, let's get comfortable." Sarah faced him and unzipped his flight suit. With her help, he removed his shoes and shrugged out of his clothes. Sarah unzipped her jeans and Harm slid them down over her slender hips. He unbuttoned her shirt and laid his head against her breasts.
"Sarah, I've dreamed so often of how it would feel to touch you, hold you, make love to you!" he sighed. "I love you so much." Harm gently slipped her blouse off and cradled her in his arms. Together, they sank onto the bed.
Sarah laid against Harm's uninjured side, her head on his shoulder, her hands caressing his chest. "Harm, are you sure you don't need medical attention?" She worried about the bruises that covered a good share of his torso.
"A very nice doctor checked me over while I was hiding out in Iran. In fact, he's the one who hid me and made the Iranians believe I was dead." He stroked her cheek, "Then the Navy doctors at Gibraltar examined me before they let me fly home." He smiled at her and saw the fatigue in her beautiful face. "Honey, close your eyes and sleep for a few hours." Harm wrapped his arms around Sarah and hummed a lullaby. She kissed his cheek and snuggled her head against his. It only took moments before he felt her relax and her slow, even breathing told him she was asleep.
Harm lay awake, holding Sarah, just enjoying her warmth, the softness of her skin, the smell of her hair. She's so beautiful, and I'm thankful that I didn't loose her to Dalton or Mic. Why did I waste so much time that we could have had together? I'm the luckiest man on earth to get another chance and I'm not letting it get away. Harm gradually drifted off to sleep.
0700 DC Harm's Apartment
Sarah woke slowly, becoming aware of the light behind her eyelids and the warm body she was clinging to, her leg draped around Harm's long powerful one, her thigh brushing his manhood. Her head lay on his familiar shoulder. . .How many times have I cried on that shoulder? she wondered. Her arm rested across his chest and she tightened her hold on him slightly.
"Are you awake?" Harm seductively whispered in her ear as he kissed it.
"Only if you're real," she answered softly.
"Oh, I'm real all right," Harm nibbled her ear and pulled her a little more on top of himself."
Sarah opened her eyes and looked into Harm's blue ones. She saw such love; it took her breath away.
As their gazes met, Harm saw the pure love and devotion that Sarah had always demonstrated reflected in her eyes, and today they sparkled with a special radiance and happiness. Do I really have the power to make you that happy? he thought in wonder. It's all I'll ever want.
They moved together and met in a kiss of pure love and reverence for each other. Harm rolled over, taking Sarah with him. He ran his hands over her shoulders and rained kisses down her neck to one breast, then the other. Sarah caressed his face, shifting under him as her need built.
Suddenly Harm pulled back, his voice breathy with desire, "Sarah, if we do what I really want to do right now, we won't manage to arrange a wedding, so I really need to take a cold shower and enlist some help with the plans. We have less than six hours."
"I know," she answered, weak with her own need. "While you shower, do you want me to call your parents and ask them to come over?"
"That would be perfect. Call the Admiral, we'll need his help too. And Sergei." Harm kissed Sarah again and headed for the bathroom. She watched him appreciatively as he walked away. He really is gorgeous, she thought. "Harm." He glanced over his shoulder. She smiled seductively, "And I thought this view couldn't be any better than in a flight suit."
He gave her a sideways look that made her melt inside. "Just wait, Marine," he promised before he slipped around the shower wall.
Sarah climbed out of bed and grabbed one of Harm's shirts from the closet. She slipped into it and went to the kitchen to start coffee, then picked up the phone and dialed Frank and Trish.
Frank answered the phone on the second ring. "Frank, it's Sarah. Something has come up, I need you and Trish to come to Harm's apartment right away."
"Sarah, are you okay?" Frank asked in concern.
"I have something that you need to see and I'll need your help before the memorial service at Annapolis. It's really important, Frank!"
"We'll be right over, Sarah!" he assured her.
"Thank you, Frank." Sarah hung up the phone and smiled, knowing how happy
they'd be to see Harm. Frank had told her about their tape and she was thrilled
that he and Harm would have a chance for a real father-son relationship. She
walked to Harm's desk for the phone number Sergei had left, glad she'd insisted
he not stay here to baby-sit her last night. She was thankful for the few hours
alone with Harm before she had to share him
with the rest of the world.
Sergei answered on the first ring. "Hello."
"Sergei, it's Sarah. I need you to come right over. I found something I want to share with you before the memorial."
"Okay, Sarah. I just finished my run. I'll shower and then be right over."
Sarah checked Harm's address book and located the Admiral's number. When there was no answer at his house, she dialed JAG Headquarters.
"Admiral Chegwidden's Office."
"Tiner, is that you?" Sarah asked, surprised that he was in the office so early.
"Yes, Colonel. There was some work that needed to be done before the memorial."
"Is the Admiral in?"
"Yes, ma'am. I'll connect you."
"A.J. Chegwidden." His answer was business like but detached. He was deep in thought, trying to figure out what to say about Harm. He didn't know if he could get through the eulogy.
"Admiral, it's Colonel Mackenzie," she said hesitantly not sure how to proceed.
"Mac, what is it? Is anything wrong?" concern rang in his voice. Mac laughed weakly, it just slipped out. A.J. realized what he'd said. "Oh, Mac, I'm sorry. Of course everything is wrong."
"Admiral, are you sitting down?" she asked.
"Yes," he answered, expecting the worst.
"Admiral, everything is right! Harm's alive."
"Hoorah!" he exclaimed softly, but with a wealth of emotion.
"Until the CIA clears it, that's privileged information. Harm's here with me and we need your help. Can you come right over?" Sarah asked.
"On my way." he said happily, hesitated a second then continued, "Sarah, don't let anything go unsaid."
"We haven't, Admiral. We haven't." Sarah's voice rang with joy.
"Good!" he responded, a weight lifted from his heart.
"Admiral, you're the only one who knows beside Clay and the people involved in Harm's rescue. Would you bring Admiral Boone with you? I think he should be in on our secret too."
"I'll contact him, and we'll be right there," the Admiral promised. Sarah hung up the phone.
Harm walked up behind Sarah, wrapped his arms around her waist, and kissed her on the neck. "That shirt looks awfully good on you."
"I've been wearing a lot of your clothes the past few days," she admitted sheepishly. "I noticed that my closet looked a little emptier than when I left," he said with a chuckle, then turned her in his arms and kissed her lips. One taste wasn't enough for either of them. As they deepened the kiss, the tea kettle started whistling.
"Saved by a tea kettle," Harm laughed. "If you don't go get dressed, my mother is going to catch me in a compromising position."
Sarah laughed at the mischievous look in his eyes as he cocked his head in that oh, so familiar way of his.
"Okay, Flyboy! But, we need juice and fruit, maybe even some rolls, for all this company we're going to be getting in a few minutes."
"I'll run across the street while you shower. I don't think I could keep myself from joining you if I stayed here." He kissed the tip of her nose.
"Tonight!" she breathed, a hint of passion in her voice.
"I'll hold you to that," he smiled that sexy flyboy smile she couldn't resist. Then he grabbed his jacket and was out the door.
Sarah Mackenzie fairly walked on air as she headed for the bedroom and bath to dress for her wedding day. She saw Harm's academy ring laying on his dresser, picked it up and tried it on for size.
0800 DC Harm's Apartment
Sarah was just coming back down the stairs, dressed in a simple navy blue knit dress that hugged her slim figure, when the doorbell rang. She answered it to find Frank and Trish, identical looks of concern on their faces.
"Come in, please, and sit down," Sarah indicated the couch and chairs. Trish looked around her son's apartment as they sat and Frank put his arm around her when she began to cry softly.
"I'm sorry," she sobbed, "Being in this apartment, seeing Harm's things, I just can't imagine life without him."
Sarah knelt down in front of Trish and took her hands between her own. She looked Harm's mother in the eyes, "The reason I asked you here was to tell you that you don't have to. Trish, Harm isn't dead. He's alive."
Trish studied Sarah and saw the happiness in the face of the beautiful young woman in front of her. "You're serious."
Sarah nodded, the sparkle in her eyes erasing the last doubt Trish had in her heart. It was true. Just then, the bell rang. Sarah rushed to open the door.
"I forgot I didn't have a key." Harm kissed Sarah, then noticed his mother. He set down the bag of groceries and crossed the room in a few long strides to take her in his arms. Trish began to sob softly. "Mom, I'm so sorry to scare you again."
"Honey, I'm just so thankful you're alive!" She hugged him tightly. Harm kissed her cheek and met his stepfather's eyes over her shoulder. "Dad?"
Tears glistened in Frank's eyes. "Good to see you, son."
Sarah watched their reunion, tears streaming down her own face.
A light tap on the door preceded Sergei's entrance with his own key. He stopped in shock at the sight of his brother.
"Harm!" he gasped happily.
Harm smiled, walked to his brother and hugged him. "Little brother, it's good to see you again. Thank you for taking care of Sarah for me."
"I'm happy you are safe. I couldn't believe you were gone. There is still so much we have to learn about each other." Sergei's voice was choked with emotion.
"We have time, Sergei. We have time and we're not going to waste any of it." Harm turned to his parents. "Sarah and I have something important to share with you, and we need your help. We'll tell you all about it over breakfast."
Trish helped Sarah set out the food then turned to her, "I hope that 'something important' is what I've been wishing for ever since Harm started working with you. You're all he ever talked about when we were together or visiting on the phone." Sarah smiled, nodded, and held up her left hand. Trish hugged her. "You're so good for him. Maybe he'll settle down and stay out of danger," she said hopefully.
"I'm not sure that is entirely possible with Harm," Sarah laughed. "But he did tell me he was glad he was a lawyer, not a full time pilot."
Harm answered the knock at the door and admitted Admirals Boone and Chegwidden. They observed military protocol, but the faces of both men showed their elation that the younger man was still alive.
"You know, son," Admiral Boone told Harm, "I've put in paperwork for a Silver Star and recommended you for a Congressional Medal."
"Sir, I don't know what to say." Harm was overwhelmed.
"Mark this day on your calendars," A.J. joked. "Harmon Rabb Jr. is speechless!"
Harm laughed. "There's another reason to mark this day. That's why we called you all here. Sarah and I need your help with a little project."
Harm walked to Sarah and put his arm around her, drawing her to his side. "I've finally gotten around to doing what I should have done years ago. I've asked Sarah to marry me, and she has agreed."
They both beamed in the chorus of 'congratulations' and 'it's about time'.
"We need your help," Harm went on. "Clay and Sarah told me about the memorial service planned for this afternoon at the Academy chapel. Since you can't call it off under Clay's media blackout, I'd like to change it into a wedding."
"I don't know if you can get a marriage license that soon in Maryland." A.J. began.
"If we don't have a legal license, we'll have another civil ceremony at the
court house later to make it legal, but I want to commit to Sarah, today, in
front of all my friends. I'm alive, but only by the grace of God. I shouldn't
have survived that crash." He felt Mac shudder and tightened his embrace. "Only
one of Clay's assets being in the right place at the right
time saved me. I
don't want to waste another day!"
"We'll help any way we can, Harm," Frank assured him. Trish smiled at her husband and her son.
"What can two old admirals do to help?" Tom Boone asked.
"Admiral Boone, can you arrange the change in plans with the officials at the academy? They need to be sworn to secrecy until Clay breaks the story."
"I think I can handle that," he assured Harm.
"Admiral Chegwidden, would you check on the marriage license?"
"Sure, son," he agreed.
"Admiral," Sarah asked hesitantly, "I'd like you to give me away. Please."
"Of course, Sarah. My pleasure. That's a much easier task than eulogizing this guy." He smiled at both of them. "We better move, we've only got a few hours."
"Four hours, twenty-four minutes," Sarah supplied automatically.
"Now that we're getting married, will you tell me how you do that?" Harm asked.
Everyone laughed as she answered, "I have to keep some mysteries or you'll loose interest."
"Not likely!" Harm kissed her affectionately.
"Sir, could you help Sergei find a tux and take him out to Annapolis with you?" Harm asked A.J. He smiled at this brother. "I need a best man and you've got the job." he said as he went to Sergei and hugged him. "I love you, little brother."
"We'll see you at Annapolis," A.J. said with a smile as the three men left the apartment. Both admirals were smiling broadly as they gave each other a high five in the hallway. Sergei wasn't sure what to think of their behavior.
"Mom, would you help Sarah shop for a dress and anything else she might need for a wedding?"
"I'd be delighted, Harm." Trish hugged and kissed her son, then took Sarah by the hand. "Let's go gather up your cosmetics and other personal items. Then we're going to buy the prettiest wedding dress in town." They headed for the bedroom.
Harm turned to smile at his stepfather. Frank took him in his arms. "Son!" Tears trickled down his face.
"Thank you, sir for loving me, even when I must have been pretty unlovable. It wasn't until I was dating Annie, and saw the look in Josh's eyes when he caught me kissing his mom, that I realized how unreasonable I'd been. You were always there for me. You were everything a father should be and never treated me as anything less than your own son. I was blind. You've been my father is every way that counts. I love you, dad." Harm held his stepfather and tears escaped his eyes too.
Frank stepped back and looked at Harm, "How can I help?"
"Be my dad. Spend the day with me, and above all, get me to the church on time." Harm laughed. "I've never done this before. You can help me remember anything I don't think of on my own."
"Do you have a wedding ring to go with the solitaire on Sarah's finger?" Frank asked.
"Yes, sir." Harm smiled.
"I'm assuming you'd already made up your mind to propose before this mission." Frank observed.
"I bought the ring months ago. Right after Sarah and Mic broke up. But Sarah
and I needed time to regain what we'd had in the past. I had to earn back her
trust after rejecting her overture in Australia. I was such a fool. I drove her
into Brumby's arms and then was too hurt and stubborn to stop her. I might have
lost her altogether if I hadn't been lost at sea the night before their wedding.
That incident made Sarah realize she still loved
me."
"Harm, you've never made life easy for any of us," Frank laughed.
"I know sir, especially you. Can you forgive me for the past?"
"There is nothing to forgive, son." He clapped Harm on the back.
"I'm looking forward to giving you some grandchildren to spoil," Harm told him.
"I bet you are!" Frank laughed and Harm joined in as he realized what that meant. When Sarah and Trish returned to the living room with Sarah's bag, they found Harm red-faced and both their men laughing.
"Trish, you girls take the limo. When you're ready head out to the Academy. Harm and I will meet you at the chapel," Frank instructed.
Harm took Sarah in his arms and drew her into a tender embrace. "You find a lovely dress, I'll make all the other arrangements, including your bouquet. The Admiral. will call you about the marriage license. No matter what, we make vows to each other, right?"
"Right! I love you for all that you are, Harm, but especially for moments like this." Sarah kissed him on the cheek. "Later, Flyboy, when we're alone," she whispered.
"Trish, Harm and I will pick Sarah up at he airport before we head out to Annapolis. You better get going ladies!"
Frank smiled broadly as Harm closed the door behind the women in his life. "Your mother is in seventh heaven! She despaired of ever seeing you marry and have a family. You know, she always thought Sarah was the right girl for you."
"I guess mother really does know best!" Harm laughed.
"Do we have time to eat some of this breakfast that no one touched?"Frank asked eyeing the fruit and bagels.
"If we hurry," Harm told him handing him a glass of juice.
Harm ate a banana and downed a glass of orange juice, then hurried to put his dress uniform in his suit bag. Frank had stowed the food and cleaned the table by the time Harm was ready to leave.
1100 DC Georgetown Jewelry
Sarah and Trish looked over the wedding bands. "So many to choose from. It used to be much easier," Trish exclaimed.
"I think Harm would prefer something simple," Mac decided pointing out a plain gold band with a narrow rope-like edging on each side.
"Nice choice, ma'am," the clerk agreed. He found the band she wanted in the appropriate size and Sarah paid for it.
"Harm is going to love your dress," Trish told her as they settled in the limousine for the drive to Annapolis.
Sarah's eyes sparkled. "Thank you for helping me pick it out. You've made me feel loved." She looked Trish in the eyes, "My family was so dysfunctional, I've never experienced anything like this before."
"I do love you, Sarah. I must remember to thank Harm for giving me such a wonderful daughter. My son is a very lucky man to have found a mate like you." Trish hugged and kissed Sarah.
1105 DC Reagan Airport
Sarah Rabb's flight, which was twenty minutes late, was just deplaning. Harm
paced nervously, worried about being late for his wedding. Frank waited for
Sarah by the door to tell her the good news. Harm saw his grandmother exit the
jet way and greet Frank, then she looked across the waiting area to where he was
standing. Harm hurried to her, seeing both tears and a smile, he gathered her in
a huge hug. "Grandma, I love you!" he
whispered.
"Harmon Rabb, Jr., I'm getting too old for these scares," she scolded, her voice full of love and concern.
"I know," he whispered. "I'll be more careful. But Grandma, I have wonderful news. I'm going to marry Mac this afternoon."
"Well, maybe a jet crash isn't such a bad thing, if it knocks some sense into you," she chuckled. "Just don't need another one to decide to have a family. I'm too old to wait forever."
"No, ma'am. I've already made that decision too. I think Sarah will agree, we want to start a family as soon as possible."
Frank put his arm around both their shoulders, "If we don't get going, the bride will think she's being stood up."
1245 Chapel at Annapolis Naval Academy
Trish adjusted Sarah's veil and stood back to admire her soon to be daughter.
Sarah's dress was simple, but elegant: silk with beaded lace insets and a long
beautifully adorned train. The bodice was modestly cut, but the back plunged
nearly to her waist with a netting of pearl strands. Her veil was also long and
flowing. Sarah's dark coloring was accentuated by the white dress. Trish sighed,
"I've never seen a more lovely bride. You're
going to take Harm's breath
away!"
Sarah looked at her reflection in the full length mirror and smiled shyly. "I still have a hard time believing this is real. I've dreamt about it, even thought maybe we were getting close, then felt like my whole life had ended Friday when I heard Harm's plane had exploded. I felt so cheated!"
"I know, darling." Trish squeezed Sarah's hand. "After Harm's father was
lost, I felt such anger with him. It got worse as time went on. I was mad at him
for leaving me all alone, for leaving Harm without a father. I loved him, I
always will, but I was angry with him. Sometimes I still am. But I've been
lucky. I love Frank dearly. He loved us unselfishly, even though he knew a part
of both of us was wishing we were with Harmon. When
Harm finally proved that
his father was dead, I grieved all over again. But then I felt free at last to
love Frank like he deserved to be loved. It takes a great love to live in
someone else's shadow for that long. Now, at last, Harm can also love Frank for
who he is."
"I felt that kind of anger when Harm left JAG, and me, to go back to flying. I felt so betrayed." Sarah remembered those feelings and shuddered. "Harm is beyond that, he's happy with his role at JAG and he has a brilliant future. But, I've come to understand how much a part of him flying is. I love him for who he is and I'll support him in every way and on every mission he chooses to fly."
"We can both be thankful that his designator is JAG. Nothing will stop him from flying occasionally, he loves flying his Tomcats too much for that, but at least we don't have to live with the daily fear." Trish hugged Sarah, who couldn't agree more.
1245 Annapolis Naval Academy Chapel
A.J. paced nervously in the foyer. "Where are you Rabb?" he muttered impatiently.
"Worried Harm's going to be late for his own funeral?" Clayton Webb asked with a laugh.
The admiral turned to the man in the wheelchair, "I'm glad to see you, Webb. We couldn't afford to loose you." A.J. greeted him affectionately then chided him, "I assume you know what's going on; where Rabb is."
"Why does everyone assume I always know what's going on?" Clay smiled when
A.J. just tilted his head and stared at him, "Harm just arrived and stopped to
see Sarah. He'll meet Sergei in the vestibule and Sarah will join you in a few
minutes. I'm going to go in
and start the party as soon as the President is
seated. Secret Service has to give me the go."
"The President is here?" A.J. was astonished.
"Rabb's a hero, A.J." Clay said with a grin. "If you thought he had a big head before, beware!"
A.J. shook his head. Webb left, a grin on his face.
1250 Another room, Chapel at Annapolis
Frank knocked softly on the door. "Can the groom and his father come in?"
"Father only," Mac answered quickly. "The groom has to wait until I walk down the aisle."
"Can he tell you he loves you?" Harm called softly through the door.
"That he can do!" Mac laughed.
"Frank has a gift from me to you. I'll see you in a few minutes. Semper Fi, Mac!" Harm hurried away to meet Sergei.
Frank entered the room and smiled broadly at Sarah. "You're beautiful darling." He kissed her and handed her a flat velvet box. She opened it to reveal two stands of pearls, a necklace and a bracelet. She opened the card with them and read:
Not even these pearls can compare to your timeless beauty. Love, Harm.
"Oh, Harm!" she sighed.
Trish helped fasten the pearls around Sarah's throat and wrist. Tears prickled behind Trish's eyelids. What had looked to be one of the bleakest days in her life, had become one of the happiest.
Frank took Sarah in his arms and kissed her on the cheek. "Take good care of him."
"I promise!" Sarah whispered before returning his kiss.
Frank handed her a large white box. "Here's your bouquet. The florist thought a wedding bouquet should have lilies or orchids, but Harm insisted on roses."
Sarah smiled and explained as she removed the bouquet of white roses from the box, "We met for the first time in The Rose Garden when President Clinton awarded him his first DFC. I never realized Harm is such a romantic." She smelled the flowers and wiped a lone tear from her cheek.
1305 Annapolis Naval Academy Chapel
The President of the United States took his seat and the Secret Service indicated to Clayton Webb that the service could begin.
Frank and Trish Burnett escorted Sarah Rabb down the aisle to the front row. President Bush rose and greeted them softly. "I was just informed by Mr. Webb of the change in plans. I'm so glad. We're very proud of your son and grandson."
"Thank you, Mr. President." Trish smiled and they all took their seats.
An aide wheeled Clayton Webb to the microphone.
Harm looked out at the crowd of people gathered to celebrate his life and mourn his death, touched by the number of people who'd made the effort to attend: politicians, Naval officers and enlisted personnel he'd served with, Academy and law school classmates, and people he'd defended. He was humbled that the President of the United States would attend his funeral. Not many men got to see who would mourn their passing.
"Mr. President, Mr. & Mrs. Burnett, Mrs. Rabb, ladies and gentlemen, you are all gathered here today to celebrate the life of a son, grandson, friend, and fellow officer of the United States Navy, Commander Harmon Rabb, Jr. Four days ago, Harm was part of a force that staged a daring mission into Iran to rescue me from an Al Queda terrorist camp. During that mission Harm helped to destroy the camp and later shot down three MiGs who attacked our force. Harm's plane was hit by a missile as he shot down the final MiG. Commander Rabb put his life on the line to protect me and the other twenty-eight men on the mission."
Clay scanned the somber group, "The wreckage, the enemy's possession of
certain items belonging to Harm, and DNA tests on the blood soaked objects
returned to us, seemed to confirm his death. This service was organized to mourn
the loss of our friend, but at 0230 today, Commander Harmon Rabb, Jr. stepped
off a plane at Andrews Air Force Base." Clay paused at the collective gasp from
the crowd. "Harm was able to eject just before
the explosion that ripped his
plane apart. He alluded Iranian and Al Queda personnel and made his way out of
the mountains, to the coast and was eventually rescued at sea by our forces. He
was aided by several individuals who oppose terrorist activities in their
country. Harm's rescue was kept secret until now to protect those people."
"It is my pleasure to present to you, Commander Harmon Rabb, Jr." Harm, in his dress whites, stepped from the wings, walked to Clay, and shook his hand.
Harm's friends and family stood to recognize him for the hero that he was. Harm looked over the packed chapel overwhelmed with emotion. Unshed tears filled his eyes.
"Please, everyone. Sit down." His voice was raw with emotion. "Thank you. I have just a few words." He waited until the crowd was reseated and the chapel quiet. "I thank each of you for being here today. I'm incredibly fortunate to have so many friends. I've been informed that I'm considered a hero, but I'm no more or less than each of you, a man doing my job, serving my country."
"I didn't go to the Gulf to fight the war on terrorism like so many of my
brave colleagues. I went as a JAG officer to investigate an accident. I just
happened to be there when a good friend needed help." Harm met Clay's eyes and
smiled. "Most of you know that my lifelong goal was to be a fighter pilot like
my dad. I was lucky enough to attend the Academy and I obtained that goal. A
medical problem ended that career, but the Navy gave me another, I became a JAG
lawyer. When my vision was restored I considered
rejoining the fleet, but I
found that I'd grown to love the law too much to give it up. But again the Navy
was generous and allowed me to keep up my flight qualification. I thank Admiral
Boone and the other officers involved in commanding the rescue effort for
allowing me to fly the mission, and I thank God for bringing me home again. In
those final moment, with the missile bearing down on my Tomcat, I thought I was
going to die and I only had one regret about the way I'd lived my life."
Harm looked at his mother, "That regret was that I've loved an extraordinary woman since the day I met her, and I let duty and pride keep me from telling her and sharing my life with her. I'm asking you, my friends, to please help me today, to celebrate life, by being my witnesses as I pledge my eternal love and fidelity to Sarah Mackenzie."
Sarah, who'd stood at the back of the chapel with A.J. moved to the aisle and stood facing Harm. As Sarah stepped into Harm's line of sight, the rest of the world disappeared and there was only the two of them. Harm's heart raced and his eyes widened in wonder. His smile upon seeing her radiated so much love and happiness that everyone there felt it and turned to follow his gaze.
A few people were shocked by Harm's revelation, but most were excited that these two warm, loving people were finally going to have the happiness they deserved.
A.J. took Sarah's arm and smiled at her, his joy for his two loyal friends evident. Meanwhile, Sergei and Harriet stepped from the wings to join Harm at the altar. Admiral Boone had spoken to the musicians who were to play for the funeral, and they began the Trumpet Voluntary. The crowd stood as A.J. escorted Sarah down the aisle.
Lieutenant Commander Meg Austin, tears of joy flowing down her face, watched as the beautiful Marine Colonel on the arm of Admiral Chegwidden, made her way down the aisle to the side of the handsome Naval officer in dress whites. He always was a knockout in that uniform, she thought wistfully. "In all the time I worked with him, I never saw Harm look at anyone like that!" she whispered to Kate Pike who was seated beside her.
"I knew a year ago that she was the one who would capture Harm. Of course, he was still in denial back then and the Colonel was engaged to another man." Kate gazed at Harm and sighed, "Nothing has changed. Even with bruises and stitches, Harm still looks like a million bucks in dress whites."
Meg giggled as Kate echoed her thoughts.
Annie Pendry hugged her son Josh, tears of gratitude pooling in her eyes that
Harm had escaped the same fate as her husband Luke. Her fiancee, aware of her
emotions, tightened his embrace. Josh felt relieved that Harm, his idol second
only to his dead father, was alive and well. Harm's death would have only
reinforced his mother's determination to keep him out of Annapolis. His desire
to become a Navy pilot was one goal he had no
intention of giving up.
Sturgis smiled broadly, watching as the Admiral placed Mac's hand in Harm's. He'd kept her secret, but it hadn't been easy. He'd seen how tormented Harm was, but Harm hadn't been forthcoming on his own feelings. Those two were so thickheaded, mayber now the office will run smoother without all their sexual tension, he thought.
Congresswoman Bobbi Lathem smiled at him. She, like many other women had once fantasized about Harm, but the man beside her now commanded her attention.
Sturgis shifted in his seat. That Smile! He was feeling a little sexual tension of his own.
A.J. beamed proudly as he slipped Mac's hand into Harm's. "Take good care of her, son."
"The best, sir." Harm promised. He enfolded both Sarah's hands in his and stood facing her, his love for her visible to everyone assembled. Sarah's heart overflowed with love for him, and her eyes, filled with tears of joy, communicated those feelings to their source.
Harm squeezed her hands, winked, and whispered, "Will you truly have me?"
"You can't back out now, flyboy!" she whispered back. Her smile made his heart race. They turned together and, hand-in-hand, approached Chaplain Turner.
He smiled at them and began, "Dearly beloved, we gathered here today in
sorrow, but God was indeed with us, watching over his child, Harmon, and that
sorrow has turned to the most joyous of occasions. Harm and Sarah, we are here
to celebrate with you as you pledge your love, devotion, and fidelity to each
other." He smiled at them, then once again addressed the gathering, "The Lord
said. . . ."
Harm and Mac gazed into each others eyes and exchanged shy smiles. Oblivious to any of the hundreds in the chapel, they were lost in each other and memories of the six year journey that had brought them to this moment.
As Mac looked into Harm's eyes, her heart swelled at his sexy 'flyboy' grin.
How could it be so cocky and shy at the same time? She marveled at the
complexity of this man she loved more than life itself. He was equally at home
in the courtroom or in the cockpit, confidently navigating through any and all
adversity. He was ruthless in pursuit of the
truth, gentle and compassionate
with people in need, dedicated and loyal to friends and family, and committed to
ending injustice. Was there ever a time I didn't love you? she wondered. You
always treated me as an equal, with respect and loyalty. From that first
mission, you were there to help and protect me, while not holding me back. You
knew me less than twenty-four hours when you risked your career and life to help
me and Uncle
Matt. You saved my life when Detective Coster was stalking me,
and the only reason you backed off in Russia was to protect me. She remembered
his words like it was yesterday, ". . .or die trying, but you shouldn't. You've
come farther with me than anyone." You gave me a shoulder to cry on, and advice,
whenever I needed them. You pushed me to make peace with my father. I'll be
forever grateful for that one. I felt valued whenever you came to me. I was
happy to be your sounding board, even if you didn't always listen to
my
advice, I couldn't believe you resigned your commission to look for
Sergei. Luckily Webb found out he was safe and the Admiral ignored that request.
You have been such a huge part of my life. How could I have ever thought about
settling for anyone other than you? I saw how much my engagement to Mic bothered
you. I just wanted you to do something about it. I'm sorry I hurt you by rushing
into that. You were right the night of my engagement party, if I hadn't done
that, it might have been the two of us then. Mac looked into Harm's eyes with
understanding and love.
Harm met Mac's beautiful deep brown eyes, the window to her soul. I'm sorry
for hurting you in Australia - I didn't want to ruin what we had by moving
forward before I was ready for this. I've always wanted you, always known you
were the one! Mac, you've always been there for me, you've saved me more often
than I can count, the Minsk, Russia, Chechnya, Panama, and my accident in the
Atlantic, to name just a few. You even saved me from myself; I shudder to think
what might have happened if you hadn't shown up
in Norfolk when I went after
Diane's killer, Hobarth. You've always supported me, believed in me. With you
I'm a better man!
"Sarah, do you take Harmon to be your lawfully wedded husband, for better, for worse, in sickness and in health, till death you do part?" Chaplain Turner brought them back to the present.
Sarah's smile was radiant. Her voice, sure and confident, carried to everyone in the chapel, "I do."
"Harmon, do you take Sarah to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, for better, or worse, in sickness and in health, til death you do part?"
Harm gave Sarah that wonderful 'flyboy' grin she loved so much, "I do."
"You may make your vows to each other."
Sarah looked into Harm's eyes, "Harm, you've been my best friend for the past six years. You've supported and comforted me in my darkest moments and celebrated my successes. The connection I feel to you transcends time and space. I will love you and be faithful only to you always."
"Sarah, I've never known anyone else like you. You are loyal and caring and always know exactly what I need. You've gone to the ends of the Earth for me and shown me the most incredible, unselfish love. I promise to love and cherish you, to be faithful only to you, all the days of my life."
Sarah reached up and caught the single tear that trickled down Harm's cheek. He, in turn, gently caressed her face, using his thumb to wipe away her tears which flowed freely.
"The ring," Chaplain Turner prompted Sergei, who handed it to Harm. Harm took the ring and slipped it over the end of Sarah's finger. "With this ring, I thee wed." He slid it all the way on.
Sarah took Harm's ring from Harriet, kissed it, then turned back to him and slid it over the end of his finger. "With this ring, I thee wed," she seated the ring at the base of his finger. Harm grasped her hand and brought it to his lips. The radiance of Sarah's smile was dazzling.
"You have pledged your lives to each other before God and this assembly. I now pronounce you husband and wife. Commander, you may kiss your bride."
Harm smiled his infamous 'flyboy' grin and taking Sarah into his arms, kissed her slowly and sensually. Applause and light laughter finally caused him to pull back. The sheepish look on his face, made Mac giggle.
"I love you, Mrs. Rabb," he whispered as they turned and faced their friends and acquaintances.
Harm caught Webb's eyes and winked, mouthing "Thank you."
Webb couldn't hide his pleasure. He grinned broadly and gave Harm a thumbs-up.
Harm clasped Mac's hand and led her to his parents. Trish hugged Sarah, "You make him happier than I've ever seen him. Thank you." Frank took Sarah in his arms as Trish and Harm embraced.
Trish looked into Harm's eyes through tears of joy. "I'm so happy for you. I know Mac's the right woman for you!" she confided.
"I agree, mom." He kissed her on both cheeks, "I love you! Thank you for all you've done for us."
Frank shook Harm's hand, then they embraced. "Thank you, Dad," Harm whispered.
Frank choked with emotion, "My pleasure, son."
Sarah Rabb's smile contained the special pride and satisfaction that only
grandparents feel. She'd known from the first time Harm ever mentioned Sarah's
name, that she would be his mate, she'd heard the promise of love in his voice.
She hugged and kissed them both. "I'm glad you finally corralled this grandson
of mine," she whispered in Mac's ear. Mac gave her a conspiratorial smile and
kissed her back. As Mac looked at Harm, the
light of her love illuminated the
chapel.
President Bush approached the bride and groom. "Congratulations Commander, Colonel. Laura and I wish you every happiness." He kissed Sarah and shook Harm's hand. "Commander, we are so glad that you made it back from Iran. On behalf of a grateful nation, thank you for your service."
"Thank you, Mr. President. I'm honored to be a part of the United States Navy. My father was a Naval aviator, and this is all I've ever wanted."
"I was told about your family's history. I'm glad you escaped the fate of your father and grandfather. Your family has already sacrificed more than most. Good luck, Commander." Secret Service agents escorted the President from the chapel.
Harm and Mac acted as ushers to dismiss the crowd. A half hour later, they stood outside with close friends and family.
"Mac, you look beautiful." Josh Pendry approached them. "Harm, I'm glad you're home safe. Mom was pretty upset. I could see her reliving what happened with dad."
"Josh," Harm clapped him on the back, "you're growing so fast. You look more and more like your dad all the time."
"Harm, I want to be just like my dad in every way." He glanced around and saw his mother was still talking to Commander Sturgis. "Mom just doesn't understand. I want to be a pilot like Dad. I'm working really hard in school so I have a chance at an academy appointment. Will you help me, Harm?"
Harm smiled at him, "I do understand how you feel, Josh. I know nothing your mom says is going to change your mind. Nothing could have ever changed mine. You've got a few years yet, maybe when your mom gets remarried and is happier, and more secure, she'll come around. In the meantime, just keep the grades up, and don't throw it in her face. You know I'll help you all I can."
"Thanks, Harm. I knew I could count on you!" Josh grinned.
Sarah smiled at the rapport Harm had with Josh. They'd always been close. She knew Harm would be an excellent father someday.
Annie and her fiancé, Philip, a vice president of her bank approached them. "Harm, Mac, you both look so happy." She hugged Harm, "Glad you're still with us!"
"Sorry to give you another scare." He kissed her on the cheek. "Congratulations on your engagement, when is the wedding?"
"June 15th. Keep the date open." She squeezed her fiancee's hand and Harm could see how relaxed and content she was with her new love.
"We wouldn't miss it," he told her, as he pulled Mac to his side.
"Harm, Mac," Kate Pike approached them. "Congratulations, Mac," she smiled, "mind if I kiss the groom?
"Be my guest," Mac laughed. Kate leaned in to kiss Harm's cheek. "Told you
so," she whispered.
Harm just laughed in that sexy, self deprecating way of his that Kate found so enduring.
Meg Austin introduced herself to Mac while Kate and Harm visited. Mac liked the petite blonde immediately. She seemed cute and sassy, but Mac knew she was a computer and legal expert. She was sure Meg had held her own as Harm's partner. "I heard about your first mission with Harm. I can sympathize. I was stuck on a submarine with him under the polar ice cap."
Meg laughed remembering it, "I'm claustrophobic and Harm kept me mad at him to take my mind off of it. Did he use the same tactic with you?"
"He didn't have to, we were practically at each other's throats back then. Until we were both nearly killed by a psychopathic medic. Harm ended up saving my life."
"That sounds like Harm," Meg smiled remembering her months as his partner. Mac saw Harm nervously watching them, "We should get together and visit. Harm doesn't talk much about himself. I'd love to hear about some of your assignments together."
"I don't think so, ladies!" Harm slipped an arm around Mac's waist and gave her one of his patented 'Don't go there' looks. "Attorney- partner privilege, I'll have you both disbarred." Harm squeezed Mac then moved to hug his former partner, "Meg, you look great!"
"Harm, I'm so glad you're safe." She smiled at him, "and that you've found happiness with Sarah."
"What about you, Meg?" Harm wondered.
"I'm stationed at Miramar, and engaged to a flight instructor. Finally gave in to gold wings and dress whites," she teased.
Harm laughed and kissed her, "Congratulations! We better get a wedding invitation."
"Yes, sir!" she agreed. "It will give you a chance to spend time at home, too."
"Harm!"
He turned at the sound of the familiar voice of Elizabeth Hawks. "Skates!" He embraced his RIO and friend as she joined them.
"You had me worried there for a minute. Do you ever do anything the easy way?"
"You know me," he grinned sheepishly.
"I'm happy for you, Harm. I thought you'd make this decision after our little swim last summer!"
"There were a few complications, but back there in Iran, I swore that if I made it home, nothing was stopping me this time." Harm reached out to Mac and pulled her back into his arms.
Frank, Trish, and Grandma Sarah watched from a short distance away. Frank laughed softly, "Harm and his harem!"
"Frank!" Trish admonished her husband.
"He's right," Sarah Rabb chuckled. "I think they've all been in love with him. But look at Harm. He only has eyes for Sarah!"
"You're right about that," Trish said with a smile, as she watched her son hug his new bride to his side and kiss her temple.
A.J. Chegwidden and Tom Boone brought Clayton Webb to Harm and Mac.
Clay
was grinning broadly at the couple. "How about a kiss from the bride?"
he teased.
Mac leaned over and kissed his cheek. "Thank you, Clay, for introducing us and for bringing him home."
"My pleasure, Mac." With a twinkle in his eyes, he hinted, "You know, I'd really enjoy being a godfather."
Mac smiled shyly and blushed, "I'll see what I can do about it."
"Mac, Harm, my mother and I have arranged for a small reception at her house. There is a limousine waiting for you. Tom Boone will drive your car back. The admirals have issued invitations to your family and friends at JAG, so if you're ready?"
Harm looked at Clay in surprise, "Thank you, that's very thoughtful of you, Clay!" Harm was awed by all their friends had done for them.
"Didn't think I had it in me, did you?" Clay joked.
Harm just grinned back. "I think we're ready." He looked to his bride, "Mac?"
"Ready," she answered. Harm could see the fatigue in her beautiful brown eyes.
Clay signaled and a white stretch limo pulled up. A.J. opened the door and helped Mac inside. Harm followed. Harriet handed Mac her bouquet before A.J. closed the door.
Mac slid into Harm's open arms and met his lips in a long, slow, sensual kiss. She laid her head against his shoulder as he parted her lips and explored her mouth with his tongue. Harm ran his hands over her shoulders and caressed her long slender neck. Mac shifted in Harm's embrace, bringing their bodies closer. Harm leaned back to look at her, then trailed kisses down her throat. "Mac!" he sighed.
"Harm, I . . ."
"I know, I want you too," Harm caressed her cheek and kissed her forehead. "I've waited so long for you. Just a few hours more. You look exhausted, sweetheart. You didn't get much sleep last night or in the past few days. .."
"Two hours thirteen minutes in the past thirty-six hours," she supplied automatically.
He looked at her in amazement, "I don't know how you do that!" She just smiled coyly. "I want you to rest, please." Harm settled Mac against his chest, her head laying on his shoulder. He caressed her back and kissed her hair.
Sarah's eyes drifted shut as she relaxed to the rhythm of his steady heartbeat. "I love you," she whispered before sleep claimed her.
Harm watched Mac sleep, struck by her childlike innocence at rest. I'm so lucky to have you. I'm thankful God gave me another chance.
The limousine slowed as they reached the beltway around D.C. The change in motion awakened Sarah.
"Hi, sweetheart. I'm glad you're awake. I was wondering if you'd mind taking a little detour with me?" Harm asked shyly.
Mac knew the look in his eyes well. "Of course not, flyboy. I think visiting your dad on our wedding day is a wonderful idea."
Her smile made his heart pound. "How did you know I was going to ask you if we could go to The Wall?"
Sarah looked deeply into his eyes, "Harm, from the moment we decided to exchange vows at Annapolis today, I knew that we would share this occasion with your dad. Our wedding day wouldn't be complete any other way." She caressed Harm's face and gave him a slow kiss, filled with love and understanding.
"Thank you," he choked, then flipped the switch to speak to the driver, giving him directions for their side trip. Harm settled back in the seat and held Mac, savoring the feel of her in his arms. Sarah looked up into his eyes, seeing the love and devotion she'd longed for.
Forty minutes later, Harm helped Sarah from the limo in front of the Lincoln Memorial. He wrapped a white shawl around her shoulders and, hand in hand, they made their way down the walkway to The Wall. Tourists and other visitors stepped aside and watched as the handsome Naval Commander in dress whites and his beautiful bride walked directly to one of the many panels.
Harm and Sarah stood side by side and touched the name etched in the cold black marble.
"Dad, I wanted to let you know that I've married the woman of my dreams, my soulmate. I'm happier than I've ever been! I know you're always with me, but I want to give you a special thanks for flying back seat with me over Iran."
Sarah looked at their reflection, remembering her visit only days before, "Sir, thank you for watching over Harm. I promise to do my best to make your son happy. I love him with all my heart." Sarah kissed her fingers and once again, touched them to the name on the wall.
Harm pulled Sarah into his arms and held her as they stood in silence before the monument. No one intruded on their moment. Other visitors stood silently at a distance, many with tears in their eyes, realizing that they were watching a man too young to have known his father very well, sharing his wedding day with a fallen hero the only way he could.
Harm and Mac stood in silence for several minutes, then Harm kissed her on the temple. "Thank you!"
"When I thought you were dead, I came here to ask your father to take care of you," she softly told him.
Harm tightened his hold and kissed her again. marveling at the wonderful woman beside him: his wife. "I guess we better head to Mrs. Webb's. Everyone will be wondering where we are." Harm hugged Sarah to his side as they made their way back to the car for the ride to their wedding reception.
When the limousine pulled up in front of the Webb's home, Bud hurried out to greet Harm and Mac. "Webb was ready to call out the troops to look for you two."
"We stopped to share the good news with Harm's father," Mac informed him with a smile.
"Where is Harriet? I never really had a chance to thank her for standing up for me at the last minute."
"She's inside with little A.J. We picked him up on the way over."
"Oh, good. I'm glad our godson can be here." She turned to Harm, "A.J. was asking for you on Sunday when I took him to the park to play. He was pretending to fly a plane. I didn't think I could be anymore heartbroken, but the thought that we'd never share the baby we agreed on three years ago totally shattered it."
"We'll have that baby, Ninja girl. I promise." Harm hugged Mac and kissed her tenderly. "We better go inside. Everyone is waiting on the two of you." Bud opened the door and Harm escorted his bride inside.
They were greeted with a shower of rose petals whose scent brought back memories of their first meeting. After another round of hugs and kisses, everyone was seated in the large dining room for an elaborate meal. A pianist provided background music and everyone relaxed.
When the dishes were cleared away, the caterers brought in an elegant two-tiered wedding cake.
"Clay, how did you arrange all this on less than twenty-four hours notice?" Mac asked in astonishment.
"My mother can arrange anything!" be bragged.
"Thank you, Mrs. Webb," Mac's voice conveyed her gratitude.
"It is the very least I could do for a man that has saved my son's life more than once," she responded.
"He's helped me out a few times too," Harm reminded her. "It's what friends do!"
Harm and Mac cut the cake while everyone looked on. Harm carried a small piece to Mac's mouth. As she accepted it, her soft lips brushed his fingers, sending tremors through his body. She read the reaction in the widening of his eyes, and smiled seductively.
Just wait, he thought.
Mac took a small piece to feed to Harm. As she held it out to him, he took it entirely in his mouth and gently sucked on her fingers. Liquid fire shot through her body. Harm cocked his head and gave her a "come hither" look out of the corner of his eyes, and flashed her his sexiest grin. Mac swallowed hard to stifle a gasp. Harm chuckled softly and leaned in for a long, slow kiss.
Trish smiled at Frank, seeing the love that flowed between her son and new daughter-in-law warmed her heart and gave her hope for the future, and grandchildren. She also hoped that her son might quit living on the edge all the time, now that he'd have a family to consider.
A.J. Chegwidden watched his two best lawyers, his friends. How could he keep them both when regulations said they couldn't be in the same chain of command? I'll worry about that tomorrow, he thought, confident that he'd find a way.
A huge grin on his face, Bud watched their exchange, Harm had been first his hero, then his friend. He cared about both of them. They had encouraged him to follow his dreams. They'd given him the self confidence that his upbringing hadn't fostered.
Earlier that afternoon, as he and Harriet sat waiting for the memorial service, he'd wondered why Mac and the Admiral weren't there, then Sergei had come for Harriet, telling her Colonel Mackenzie needed her. He'd sat alone with his grief, watched Harm's family enter and speak briefly with the President. The world had seemed upside down. Then Webb had introduced Harm and he'd felt that grin start. He was thrilled beyond words, that his friends had found happiness.
Bud's thoughts were interrupted by Clayton Webb. "Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to propose a toast." At Webb's direction a waiter handed Harm and Mac champagne flutes, making sure Mac's contained sparkling cider. All the guests around the table raised their glasses of champagne.
Webb smiled at Harm and Mac, "You two make a great team, and a perfect
couple. I've been told that friendship is the firmest foundation for marriage.
The two of you have taught me about friendship, devotion, and loyalty to each
other as well as country. I've never met two people more suited for each other.
I wish you every happiness. To Mr. and Mrs. Harmon Rabb, Jr." Everyone raised
their glasses and drank. "Admiral," Webb
prompted.
A.J. Chegwidden stood, "Harm, Mac,. . . it's about time!" Laughter filled the room. "Commander, you're a bright man, but this is the smartest move I've seen you make!"
Harm smiled at Mac, "I couldn't agree more, Admiral!"
Frank Burnett squeezed Trish's hand and stood. He looked across the table at
his stepson. "Harm, I've watched you grow up into the man you are today. I have
always admired two very special qualities in your personality: your loyalty and
commitment. Loyalty, first and foremost to your father and friends. While I
wanted to wring your neck for the agony
you put your mother through, I
couldn't help but admire the loyalty, determination, initiative, and courage you
displayed by running away to Laos when you were sixteen years old to look for
your father." Frank smiled tenderly, "You never gave up hope, and while he
didn't survive long enough for you to find him alive, you learned his fate and
proved you were right for far longer than anyone else thought possible."
Frank looked around the table. "Your friends have shared interesting stories with us the past few days. They've told us how you've risked your life and career to help others. And, they've told us about the loyalty you have shown to them."
Frank smiled at Mac, "Sarah, Harm has shared your dedication, loyalty, and
courage with us ever since you became partners. The way he always talked about
you, his mother sensed this moment, she just couldn't believe it took him so
long." More laughter echoed around the table. "We know you will both apply that
same love, commitment, and loyalty to each other and have a long and wonderful
life together." Frank and Trish toasted
Harm and Mac and everyone else drank
to the couple.
"Thank you, dad . . .mom," Harm looked at them with love and respect, then kissed his bride longingly. When he wrapped his arms around her and looked into her eyes, she knew exactly what he was thinking.
They stood and looked around the table at their family and friends. Mac addressed them, "We both appreciate all you've done to make today a special occasion. We're truly blessed to have such a wonderful family, both by birth and by association. We love you all." As Mac scanned the room, the radiance of her smile touched everyone present.
Harm hugged Sarah to his side and kissed her temple, then glanced around the table, "Now I'd like my wife to myself, so if you will excuse us."
"We'll see you to the door," Frank and Trish stood. Harm glanced at Clay, still in a wheelchair, "Thanks again, for everything!"
"My pleasure." Clay's smile was genuine and warm, so different from the man they'd first met almost seven years earlier.
Harm and Mac stopped to hug Sarah Rabb. "I love you, Grandma," Harm told her. We'll fly up to see you when the weather gets warmer."
Mac hugged Harm's other Sarah, remembering the flash of jealousy she'd felt when she learned the name of his plane. "I'm glad you were here with us. I'll take good care of him for you." Sarah Rabb smiled at her new granddaughter, feeling a peace of mind about Harm that had never been there before.
Trish and Frank walked with Harm and Sarah to the door. "Harm, I'm so happy for you, so proud of you!" Trish hugged her son, the image of his father. "I love you."
"I know, mom. I love you too!" Harm kissed her on the cheek. Trish hugged Sarah, "It's not easy loving a Rabb man, but it's worth the worry," she whispered.
Sarah smiled, "I've learned that the hard way."
Frank hugged them both. "We have a wedding gift for you. Call us sometime tomorrow."
"We will," Harm assured him, then put Sarah's shawl around her shoulders and escorted her to the waiting limousine. He gave the driver the address then joined Sarah in the back seat.
Harm gazed into Sarah's eyes as the car pulled away from the Webb residence into the light evening traffic. Mrs. Rabb. . . I've waited a lifetime for tonight. I'm going to show you just how much I love you!" he murmured seductively, his breath tickling her ear.
"I'm counting on that," she responded as she gently pulled his head down until his lips met hers. Passion flared between them, and their hands caressed each other's arms, backs, throats. Harm parted Sarah's lips and their tongues mated.
"Oh, Harm! I never imagined. . ." Mac gasped before Harm's lips reclaimed hers. She was lost in the most incredible warmth and love she'd ever experienced.
Harm finally pulled back and looked into her passion filled eyes, "I've always found you desirable, but if I'd known, I could never have resisted this long!"
Sarah smiled, the twinkle in her eyes blinding. "Why ever did I run away after your crash!"
"Sweetheart, we just have to know there was some reason, and we'll appreciate each other that much more."
Mac slid her arms around Harm and drew him closer. Their passion for each other consumed them. She nibbled his ear, ran her hands through Harm's trim dark hair and then down across his shoulders.
Harm caressed Mac's back through the strands of pearls crisscrossing it. He felt her shiver with desire. "I love you more than anything on this earth." His voice was soft and choked with passion.
"I love you too, Harm. I can't believe we've finally admitted our feelings and are really together. It's so perfect, I'm afraid something terrible will happen to tear us apart."
"Never," Harm promised. "I'll never let you go, now that we've found our way to each other."
Harm cradled Mac in his arms for the duration of the ride home. They walked into his building, hand in hand, but when they reached his apartment, Harm unlocked the door and sweeping Mac into his arms, stepped across the threshold. "Here we are Mrs. Rabb, alone at last!"
Mac gently caressed Harm's face and slid her fingers through his hair, "I love the sound of that! Say it again."
"Mrs. Rabb," He kissed the tip of her nose, "I want you! I need you!" he breathed.
"No more than I need and desire you," Mac met his lips and proved her point.
Harm, cradling her close, walked to the bedroom, where he gently set her on her feet. Mac looked up at him, her eyes full of passion, trust, and most of all, love.
"What have I ever done to deserve you?" he asked, his voice full of wonder.
"You've loved me," she answered simply, brushing away tears of joy.
Harm caught her hands and holding them to his heart, leaned over and kissed away the remaining tears. "We still need to make this legal, since we couldn't get a license today, but. . ."
"Harm, we pledged our lives to each other, that's as legal as I need tonight."
Their lips met, sealing their vows one more time. Harm glanced at the bed, "Look, honey, a gift for you."
Mac looked down and saw the white box with her name on it. She opened it, revealing a beautiful white negligee. She picked up the card and read:
I'm not sure if this is for you, or for my son. I love you both. Mom
"Oh, Harm!" Mac looked at him with tears in her eyes. "It is so wonderful to be a part of a family. Your mother is the best."
"I couldn't agree more! Now, I'd love to see you in that. Mom did say it was for me too."
Mac grinned. "I'll need a little help with the back of my dress." She turned away from him, clutching the negligee.
Harm's hands shook as he worked the catches on the strands of pearls, exposing Mac's soft silky flesh. When he finished, he turned her around and kissed her on each temple, then the tip of her nose. "Sarah, hurry. Please!"
Mac laughed and caressed his cheek, "I'll be right out." She slipped into the bathroom and smiled at him.
Harm removed the box and turned down the bedding, then slipped out of his shoes and socks. He unbuttoned his dress whites and slipped out of the jacket, then the slacks. He'd just finished hanging them in the closet when Mac opened the door.
"Hey, flyboy!"
Harm turned to face her and froze in amazement. Sarah stood before him in a beautiful white lace gown and robe with billowy sleeves. The white color accentuated her olive complexion and black hair. He'd seen her in beautiful ball gowns and the white night gown in Russia that had disturbed his sleep for months, but she'd never looked more beautiful or desirable.
Sarah smiled at him as if she could read his mind and was enjoying herself, "Are you just going to stand there?"
"Not likely!" he answered as he gathered her in his arms and walked to the
bed. Harm gently laid her on the pillow and leaned over her, "You're so
beautiful!" He reverently cupped her cheek with the palm of his hand, then
stoked a finger down her throat, trailing kisses in its wake. Sarah ran her own
hands over his shoulders, and arched her body to meet his lips. Harm eased the
strap from her shoulder allowing him access to her breast.
He met her eyes
then teased her nipple with his lips and tongue. He could feel her react
instantly, but hadn't counted on how affected he'd be by her. White hot need
shot through his body. "Sarah!" he gasped, "I need you."
"I need you too, Harm. I've waited so long, I can't wait any longer either!" Sarah met Harm's lips and their tongues mated as she helped him remove his shorts and shirt. She caressed his lean muscular body as he ran his hand up her thigh. She arched to meet his probing fingers.
"Harm, please!" she begged. Sarah cradled his manhood and helped him to ease gently into her. They clung to each other, then Harm caressed her face and kissed her passionately as he began to move, slowly at first. Sarah matched his rhythm and ran her hands over his back, grasping his shoulders as her body trembled in release. Harm felt her climax and joined her, their bodies and souls one.
Mac relaxed in Harm's arms, her head resting on his chest over his heart, her arms wrapped around his waist. She felt his soft kisses on her hair and forehead, and his hands roaming possessively over her lower back, holding her to him.
"Harm, in my whole life, I've never felt this complete. I love you darling."
"Oh, Sarah, don't ever leave me. I love you more than I ever thought possible." He tightened his grip and kissed her to show her how much. "I always knew being with you would be wonderful!"
"Why did it take so long?" she whispered.
"It's always been complicated. Sarah, I've always seemed to lose people I loved; my father, Gym, Diane . . . It's hard to let yourself love when you know what it's like to lose love. I know you understand that part. Once I realized I'd fallen in love with you, I knew that if I let myself love you, I could never survive losing you. I wasn't sure you loved me like that. Back then, you didn't truly understand my need to fly and you turned to Mic overnight. I'm not sure you ever understood what that did to me."
"Harm, I. . ."
"No, Sarah, I'm not blaming you. It's okay. I understand now that I hurt you
very much that day, but back then, I was totally unaware of what I'd done. It
was my fault. When I went down at sea, I realized what was important. I would
have told you the night Mic left, but I couldn't turn Renee away when her father
had just died. I tried to tell you I'd give up
Renee on the carrier, but you
walked out on me. Then when she left me, it didn't mean anything anymore. By
then, we'd lost so much of what we had. I didn't know if we'd ever get it back."
"Harm, I'm so sorry. The last year is my fault." Sarah stroked his cheek.
"And the one before that was mine, but none of it matters now. We have each other and always will!" Harm kissed the tip of her nose. "How can I make our wedding day even more perfect?"
"Well, you could give me that baby we agreed on, even if we're a couple years early." Mac smiled shyly and slid her hand down over his belly.
"Really?" he asked, wonder in his voice and eyes.
"Really, flyboy! There's nothing I'd like better," she gave him one of the smiles he never could resist.
"Your wish is my command." Harm rolled over with her and began stroking her body as his mouth sent shivers of desire racing through every nerve. Mac met him every step of the way as they found paradise together.
Mac woke to the scent of fresh brewed coffee and sizzling bacon. She stretched languidly and remembered their lovemaking. I'm in heaven she thought rapturously.
"Oh! You are awake," Harm beamed at her as he approached the bed with a tray. "Breakfast?"
"Yes, I'm starving!" Mac sat up and pulled on the gown laying on the bed. Harm set the tray down and embraced her. "You do know the way to a girl's heart," she teased.
"I know my girl," he returned playfully, meeting her lips for a quick kiss.
"I like the sound of that!" she replied, hugging him and kissing his cheek. Her stomach rumbled.
"Eat your breakfast, 'Ninja Girl', then we play."
Mac smiled at him and took a bite of the bacon strip he held out to her. Harm
handed her the tray with bacon, toast, coffee, juice, and an omelet, and then
went back to the kitchen for his own tray with juice, coffee, and an omelet.
They sat on the bed eating and relishing each other's company. When they
finished, they carried their dishes to the
kitchen.
Mac placed her glass and plate in the sink and stood back watching Harm straighten up. How many times have I seen him in boxers? she wondered. Definitely a sight I'll never tire of.
"You know, I 've always rather enjoyed the sight of you in boxers," Mac teased remembering the night she stayed at his apartment to 'protect him' from Palmer, and other occassions in the line of duty.
"It's no different than jogging shorts," he argued.
"Oh, it's different. Much sexier," she laughed.
"Well, if we're going to talk about sexy, that white nightgown you wore in Russia . . ." he broke off at her giggle and looked long and hard at her. His eyebrows arched as he began to grasp what her grin meant. "That was on purpose, " he accused.
"Guilty as charged," she laughed out loud at the petulant look on his face.
"I knew it. That nightgown interfered with my sleep for months!"
"That was the idea!"
Harm picked her up in his arms and carried her back upstairs. "Time to pay," he teased holding her over the bed.
"Finally!" she sighed and they tumbled on the bed, both laughing. One kiss later, they were lost in each other.
One hour later:
"Hi, Dad," Harm felt a huge wave of release from his new relationship with Frank. "Mac and I are driving over to Annapolis to get a marriage license so we can make this arrangement of ours legal. We thought we'd have a late lunch at the harbor and were wondering if you and mom would like to go along."
His eyes darted to Mac walking across the room toward him. She was dressed in navy slacks and a red and white cotton sweater, and more beautiful than he'd ever seen her.
"Yeah, Dad. We're sure. We'd love to have you come with us," he was drawn back to his conversation. "Great! We'll be over to pick you up in a half hour."
Harm replaced the receiver and pulled Mac into his arms. "You're more beautiful today than ever. How is that possible?"
"The guy I love loves me!" she smiled radiantly and kissed him lightly on the cheek, "I've never been so happy."
"Me too!" he agreed, returning her kiss, lightly at first, then deepening it. Harm molded her to his body and stroked her back.
"If you keep that up, Flyboy, we're going to need an F-14 to keep that date you just made," she teased.
"Okay, later, Marine."
"Promises, promises," she laughed.
Harm helped her into her jacket as they walked out the door. A half hour later, on the dot, they picked up Frank and Trish at the hotel and headed for Annapolis.
Mac sat in back with Trish who was smiling broadly. "Mac, I haven't seen my son so happy and carefree since he was six years old. Thank you!"
"We're both thankful to have each other." Mac glanced at Harm who caught her eyes as he glanced back. The grin he flashed her melted her heart as it always had.
They stopped at the courthouse for the license, then they drove to the Academy and repeated their vows with the chaplain. Frank and Trish were happy to act as witnesses.
"You can't back out now!" Harm waved the license, teasing Sarah as they exited the chapel hand in hand. Mac just squeezed his hand and smiled indulgently.
He stopped and looked around, a twinkle lighting up his beautiful blue eyes.
"Penney for your thoughts, 'Flyboy'," Mac asked.
"I have so many wonderful memories here," he looked into her beautiful, loving brown eyes and pulled her into him arms, "especially yesterday and today!" He kissed her tenderly, "I love you, Sarah."
"I love you too, Harm," she caressed his cheek before slowly standing on tip toe to meet his lips once more.
"Are you hungry, Marine?" he asked when he finally released her.
"Silly question," she teased. "We did promise your parents lunch."
"I know a restaurant with great seafood. It's only a few blocks, just outside the Academy by the wharf."
"It's a beautiful day. Let's walk," Trish suggested. "It's been years since I've been to Annapolis. Not since you graduated," she told him. "I love the history of this area."
Harm led the way, and a half hour later, they settled in for lunch at the dockside restaurant that Harm remembered from his days as a midshipmen. "The soft-shelled crabs and the crab cakes are both excellent here," he informed them. "Luke Pendry could put away more crabs than you can even imagine." Harm smiled at the memory of his friend. Mac squeezed his hand and he caught hers and brought it to his lips.
After everyone had ordered, and they were sipping their drinks, Frank exchanged a knowing smile with Trish and turned to Harm and Mac. "Have the two of you talked about where you are going to live?"
Harm smiled at Sarah, "Not really, we've been a little preoccupied." When she blushed, Harm quickly hugged and kissed her before continuing, "Probably my apartment for the time being, but we'll need to find a bigger place since we'd like to start a family as soon as possible."
Frank didn't miss the smile that lit up his wife's face at that revelation. He knew how much she wanted grandchildren. The idea appealed to him too. "Have you thought about buying a house?" he asked.
Harm smiled at Mac and squeezed her hand. "We'd love that, but it will take us a little while. Navy salaries don't go too far and houses around D.C. are pretty expensive."
Frank took Trish's hand in his own and spoke to this proud young man, who had so recently become truly his son, "I think we can help you there."
"Frank, we. . . ." Harm started.
"Son, hear me out." Frank smiled at Trish. "When your mother and I first
married, I made it clear to her, that as her husband, I would provide for both
of you, and always treat you as my son. We took all of your father's survivor
benefits and insurance and invested them, in trust, for you. You've always been
so independent, and haven't needed the money
before, so we've never mentioned
it."
"Frank, Mom," Harm looked at them with love, "I don't know what to say."
"Honey, we love you and have always wanted the best for you. Your father would want that too. He'd be happy to know that you can use those benefits now to have a better life."
"Frank, I had no idea," Harm smiled at this man who had loved him from the first and truly considered him a son.
"The fund was administered well, for almost thirty years." Frank handed Harm a computer print out, "I contacted the administrators this morning to initiate the transfer to your control. That is the value as of this morning."
Harm unfolded the paper, his eyes opened wide, and his mouth gaped.
"Harm?" Mac stared at him. He showed her the printout. "Oh!" she whispered and met his startled eyes.
Frank kissed Trish lovingly on the temple as they looked on joyfully. "Harm, I've never known you to be speechless," Trish teased her son, "and this makes twice in two days."
"We could buy three or four houses with this!" The wonder hadn't left Harm's voice.
"Be sure to pick out a house with a large yard for the children," his mother advised him. "I want my grandchildren to have plenty of room to run and play." She smiled lovingly at her son and daughter-in-law.
Harm stood, walked around the table and hugged and kissed his mother, then turned to Frank. The two men looked deeply into each other's eyes and saw the love that had been so recently acknowledged, but which Harm now realized, had been a part of his life from the very beginning. Words weren't necessary, they just embraced.
Returning to Mac, Harm knelt down beside her and took her into his arms. "How do you feel about a little house hunting?" Harm could feel the grin that seemed a permanent part of his face, and saw the reaction he was getting from his bride.
Mac took his face in her hands and kissed him, then glanced at Trish, "I can't resist that 'flyboy' grin. However did you manage not to give in and spoil him?"
Trish laughed, "His smile was a lot more innocent when he was little, and then it almost disappeared when his father went down over Vietnam." Trish seemed lost in time for a moment, then focused on Harm. "That particular grin didn't appear until he'd been accepted to the Naval Academy, then suddenly, he had his father's smile. That was when it became hard to deny him anything. But, he's always asked for so little." She smiled at her son, "You were born to be a naval officer. I know your father is so proud of you," she squeezed Frank's hand, "and so are we!"
"Thanks, Mom," Harm took his seat when the waitress brought their salads. They all concentrated on their meals and a discussion of what features they should look for in a house.
Later that evening:
Harm relaxed on the couch in his apartment, candles illuminating the room in gentle, warm light, Rachmaninoff softly playing in the background, and the love of his life in his arms. "Could life be any better than this?"
He wasn't aware that he'd voiced the thought until Sarah whispered, "No," and tilted her face up to meet his lips. Her tongue, dancing with his, was creating the most amazing sensations which coarsed through his body.
"Harm, will it always be this wonderful?" Sarah asked breathlessly when she pulled back to gaze lovingly at him.
"Always!" he promised, "Even when we're having a disagreement, and especially when we're making up because we've had a fight." He hugged her closer, "You're all I thought of the past few days. All I wanted was to be with you."
"Harm, do you remember being shot down?" Mac asked tentatively. Her voice so soft he barely heard it.
"Only partially," he stroked her back absently as he thought about it, "I remember the missile closing in, the sudden jerk as my seat shot from the plane, and then the fireball." Mac felt the tremor that ran through his body. "I thought it was going to engulf me. I remember screaming your name, then nothing until Sam pulled me from the cleft in the rocks where he'd hidden me."
Sarah looked down, studying her hands, trying to decide whether to tell him all she'd sensed about his experience. "Harm, I saw the explosion and heard you call me," she glanced up to see his reaction.
He stared at her in amazement, "Like you found me in the Atlantic?"
She nodded, "Except that this just came to me, I wasn't trying to reach you like I was last May. You reached out mentally to me and I heard you."
"Oh, sweetheart!" he kissed her lovingly on the temple as he held her close.
"I was so scared! I never saw the parachute. . . I thought you were dead." Harm hugged her tighter when he felt her shudder. Sarah continued, "But later I heard you clearly say you were coming home. I thought I was losing my mind."
"Sarah, I'm so sorry! I can only imagine how I'd feel if I saw something like that happen to you. I'd be going crazy with worry." Harm couldn't bear the thought of anything happening to her.
"Actually, the later images were what kept me hopeful. . . especially after the pictures in the newspaper. I couldn't understand how they'd have a piece of your jacket and your dogtags if you were still alive."
"That was Sam; his attempt to make them believe that I'd been blown apart so they wouldn't come looking for me." He caressed her back as he held her, "I'm sorry it caused you and mother grief, but it seemed to work. I didn't have any trouble sneaking out of the country."
"Thank God!" Mac kissed him. "Having you back safely makes up for a few days of hell."
"I wish I could have seen you. . . wearing my clothes, sleeping in my bed. Too bad this isn't a two way channel." He leered at her playfully.
Sarah laughed softly, "I kept wondering what you would say if you caught me sleeping in your bed; wearing your clothes?"
Harm raised his brows and gave her that look she so associated with him, that
'I can't believe you're saying or doing that' look. "You have no idea how often
I dreamed about you in my bed," he revealed softly. He smiled at her. "I had to
spend hours in a hidden compartment of a truck while it bumped over, what I
swear were the roughest mountain roads in the world. That's probably where most
of these bruises came from. I just kept
picturing how you looked in that sexy
gypsy dress when we were trying to sneak across Russia."
Sarah smiled at the memory, Harm had been awfully dashing himself.
"Memories of Russia also brought back memories of that white nightgown, and they helped me get through a long night. Of course, I was in desperate need of a cold shower after that." He kissed her throat and ran his hands over her arms, mesmerized by her silky smooth skin.
Sarah shivered, "That explains why I thought you were in a coffin. I couldn't think of any other explanation for seeing you in a box. Harm, I heard you say you loved me." He kissed her temple and hugged her tighter. "I knew then that I wasn't having a memory because you'd never spoken those words to me."
"A mistake I'll never make again. I'll tell you and show you everyday for as long as I live, how much I love you!"
"I also saw you gazing out a window at a starry sky. . ." she spoke absently, almost to herself, then looked up into his clear blue eyes.
Harm responded to the question in her voice, "The night before I was going to be smuggled out of Iran, I couldn't sleep. I stood by the window and watched the same stars that would be shining over you a few hours later. It made me feel closer to you. . . made me feel safe," Harm lightly brushed Sarah's lips, "You are my home. . . . you ground me. . . wherever you are, is where I want to be."
Sarah cupped his cheek in the palm of her hand and lost herself in his incredible blue eyes. Harm slowly closed the distance between them and their lips met, a reaffirmation of their love and commitment to each other.
"Harm, I had another vision . . . a dream."
"Tell me about it," he whispered seductively then nibbled her ear and feathered kisses down her throat. He ran his hand over her flat stomach and gently caressed one breast.
Passion filled Sarah's voice, "You were holding me, and thanking me for giving you a 'handsome son and an adorable daughter'."
"Mmmm," he murmured, "I think we should go work on making that dream come true." Harm blew out the candle, gathered Mac into his arms, and carried her to his bed. . . . the place he'd always known she'd belong some day.
Just the beginning. . . .