A Lifeline for Eternity
Author: Hollyjp
Background: Story picks up early in season eight...and then rewrites JAG history...I guess it would be called Alternate Universe.
Author’s Note: The question was brought up at the Harmyboard, “what would happen if someone got a picture of Harm and Mac during their kiss on AJ’s porch during Lifeline and released it to the press”...and I got to thinking about it...and then someone hinted that the fanfic writer’s should go at this...and then there was the March HBX fanfic challenge and I caved....this is the results. Hope you like it.
Disclaimer: JAG is the property of Bellisario Productions, CBS, and Paramount. I have borrowed their characters for entertainment purposes only. No monetary gain will result from their appearance in my story.
Author’s Notes:
A Lifeline for Eternity
PART 1
Commander Harmon Rabb and Lt. Colonel Sarah Mackenzie listened to Admiral Chegwidden as he informed them they were headed out to the Seahawk each assigned to their own investigation. Harm needed to investigate the mishap on board that had severely injured several men, while Mac was to investigate the original investigator, Lt. Loren Singer, in order to try to determine if her current health problem was related to anyone on board ship. No one noticed Harm’s interest in the situation as anything more then idle curiosity.
AJ watched his two officers depart as he leaned back in his chair and sighed. Those two had given him more gray in what little hair he had, and caused him to pull out a few he didn’t really want to lose over the past seven years. He’s known Harm for a year longer and he had watched him mature from a over confident cocky pilot-investigator and lawyer to the confident officer he now was. AJ knew that flying was in his blood and he was good at it. It had about killed him to let Harm go back to flying for that six month period. He had been equally as thrilled when Harm had asked to return. AJ has willingly brought him back, yet there had been moments he had question that wisdom of that decision.
AJ shook his head to stop the memories of Australia, Bud’s broken jaw, Mac’s almost marriage to Mic, Harm being lost at sea, the tension between the two when Mac had returned from her TAD before the JAG-a-thon, and the way they had both refused to leave Bud’s side when he lost his leg. These two officers had helped him make this place a family, like his SEAL units had been - like he tried to make anyplace under his command. He had never been as successful at that until he had been fortunate enough to have Mac, Harm and Bud assigned to his staff, and then later Harriet. Together, they had made this place special. AJ also knew that before long, he would need to think about moving on. He thought maybe Meredith was the one he could move on with, and yet something held him back from making a total commitment to her...and he couldn’t put his finger on it. For now, it was time to get back to the pile of work on his desk. He reached to open the mail.
Airborn Over the Atlantic
“Were you as surprised as I was that the Admiral shipped us both of together on this assignment?” Mac asked Harm.
“I guess not. I mean, you are the likely one to investigate Singer. We don’t have a junior female investigator on staff right now.”
“True. You make sense so far...but why not have me do both?”
“As for the mishap, I do know carriers and I just cleared the last of my current cases yesterday. It was this or case reviews and cold case investigations if this hadn’t come up.”
“Yeah...my cases were cleared also. I was going to take some leave, but maybe things will still be slow when we get back.”
“Planning on doing anything special on your leave, Mac?”
“Not sure. A part of me wants to go to the desert to look for ichnytes, another part of me wants to hit a beach somewhere and soak up some sand and sun...what would you do on leave?”
“Depends on who I was going to be with.”
“And who would you take your leave with?”
“Not sure...haven’t had any interesting offers,” Harm teased flashing Mac his high wattage smile.
Mac smiled back, closed her eyes and shook her head. “We have a long flight...think I’ll nap awhile.”
“Okay...but if you come up with any interesting ideas that you want to share on your leave, let me know.”
Oh boy! Harm was turning on the charm and it was so hard to resist when he was like this. Fun, playful, happy, sexy....well he always seems sexy, Mac thought. This was more like the Harm she had first come to know. She hadn’t trusted easily back then and although she had tried to be a confident and gung-ho as any other Marine, Mac had needed to fight for her confidence and composure all the time back then. This man, however, had stormed into her life and from the first, had either disarmed her with his charm and high wattage smile or challenged her with his heroism and devotion to the truth.
She felt her body relax and although she doubted she would sleep, it felt good to let her mind wander and know that Harm was just inches from her. As her arm draped over the arm-rest, she knew that it wouldn’t take much for her hand to slip and for her hand to rest on the hard, warm, khaki covered thigh in the seat next to her. She had to fight a grin thinking how Harm would react if she let herself do just that. One part of her wanted to find out.
Their relationship, what ever it was between them, had become something warm and wonderful in the last year since the first JAG-A-thon. Renee had moved out of his life; Mac had survived the humiliation of Mic leaving her and realized she was relieved that he hadn’t been willing to reschedule the wedding. He had realized what it had taken her a while longer to acknowledge - she was in love with Harm. She knew she had loved his as a friend and a partner...a platonic love. She knew at one point she wanted to explore the potential for more, but he hadn’t been ready so she had turned to Mic and had honestly thought she could love him...she did as a friend and a co-worker...but not the way she should have the man she was to marry.
She felt Harm shift in his seat and his leg bump hers - his hard, warm, long leg. Mac felt her temperature rise recalling the feel of that leg wrapped around her in the middle of a desert night to keep her warm. The only reason she had resisted cuddling close to him that night was fear of not keeping her hands to herself. They had been growing closer over the previous months and earlier that day she had come so close to losing him forever in that minefield. She knew that if she made a move and Harm wasn’t ready for it, he would shut down or push her away. He had done it before. Not wanting to risk it, she had not slept much that night, but she had enjoyed being held close to him.
Mac could still recall almost every second in his arms that night. She had told him that she would keep watch first, because she knew she had been too wound to sleep. He had closed his eyes and slept. She had heard his breathing change and felt him relax even though he had held her close with his arms and legs. It had been like being wrapped tight in a rock hard cocoon. Mac had felt her breasts pressed against his chest and arm and knew that her nipples had stood at attention. She had felt something else rise to its full mast, pressed against her before morning as well. Somehow the knowledge that Harm wanted her on some level at least made her feel hopeful that even Harm would have to admit they needed to talk about what they should do with these feelings...and what those feelings were.
Harm had turned in his seat to watch his partner sleep. She was so beautiful, which everyone could see on the outside. He knew just how beautiful the woman was on the inside too. It was the part of her that she hid from most people, because it showed her vulnerability and that she couldn’t trust most people to see. Bud, Harriet, Chloe, and he had seen that part of her. It made him want her all the more, but he couldn’t act on that desire or his feelings. In order for them to be together, they couldn’t work together. The thought of some other guy working on cases with her, spending the long hours in close quarters with his Mac, he just couldn’t stomach...so he said nothing so that they could at least have these stolen moments together.
Harm knew that in uniform they would be careful to conduct themselves in an appropriate manner. It was always harder to control things when they were in civilian clothes. He had almost caved in that night on the ferry, but he hadn’t and he had almost lost her. The fates had smiled on them once again and they were getting another chance to get things right. He remembered the night on the Admiral’s porch when they had admitted they loved one another and then he had lost control and kissed her. She had put him on the spot asking her what he saw when she looked at him. He had wanted to say, “My future...my bride...the mother of my children...my best friend...my rocking chair companion...my lifeline,” but he hadn’t. He had simply told her he saw a desirable woman. He hadn’t lied...he just hadn’t told her the whole truth.
He watched her face and knew she wasn’t asleep yet. She was at least thinking about something pleasant judging from the smile on her face. He wondered what it was and if she thought about him, the way he thought about her. One reason he didn’t want to sleep on the plane sitting next to her was he knew he couldn’t hide the evidence of his thoughts of her when he slept. His mind drifted back to one of his most embarrassing moments...at least in the past year.
They had been forced to sleep in the desert one night and the temperatures dropped. He didn’t want to risk hypothermia for either of them, and so he had suggested they wrap up in each other for body heat. He never gave it a thought that his body would betray him the way it had. She had offered to stay alert during the first part of the night while he slept. Mac had assured him that she wasn’t tired, and he had been exhausted. He slept intending to wake up in a few hours so she could sleep. When he did wake up, he had been hard as a rock and the evidence of his dreams of her was pressed between them. He knew she had to have been aware of his condition, but she never said a word, even when he had hurriedly stood up and turned his back to her, claiming to have an urgent nature call. He had stepped behind some brush and relieved himself by hand, biting his lip to keep quiet. Once composed he had returned to her and readied themselves for the continued hike to return to base camp.
It had been a close call, in Harm’s mind. He didn’t think she would appreciate her best friend lusting after her so he decided to make light of it. He couldn’t stand the idea of not having her with him on cases, like they were on this one. Close by his side where he could talk to her, touch her casually, see her smile, hear her laugh, and share a certain degree of intimacy all partners have. No, Harm couldn’t risk it when they were in Afghanistan, and he wouldn’t risk it now. If he had to keep a wall around himself, close part of himself off to her to do it, he would. They had been growing closer emotionally and physically and it was getting more and more difficult to hide his desires from her. But to keep her at his side he had to do it.
JAG Office
USS Seahawk
Mediterranean Sea
“Lt. Singer?” asked Petty Office Coates. “Are you alright Ma’am?”
“Fine...why wouldn’t I be?”
“No reason...you just looked a little green Ma’am, like you needed to hurl.”
“Don’t...say...that..word!” Lt. Singer reprimanded her, grinding each word out through clenched teeth as she fought to keep her stomach contents in place.
“Hurl, Ma’am?” PO Coates asked with a grin, watching Lt. Loren Singer move her enlarged figure to the head in the office before emptying her stomach there. Coates knew it had been a mean thing to do, but she just couldn’t resist the urge to pay Lt. Roberts’ replacement back for the mean things she had done and said to so many of the people at JAG, say nothing about the treatment she had received from her the previous time they had met.
“Coates, please...leave me alone awhile...I need to get this paperwork in order for the JAG they are sending to review my claims and I am not up to your cheery attitude today.”
“Yes, Ma’am...actually I came here to tell you that two JAGs are on board the COD on its way from the mainland.”
“Two?”
“Yes Ma’am.”
“Want to take bets on which two it is?” Singer grumbled under her breath.
“Ma’am?” Coates asked puzzled as to what the Lieutenant might mean.
“I’m sure Rabb and Mackenzie have convinced the Admiral to send them. I’m surprised he felt the need to send two JAGs on this case though, but they are good at wrapping him around their fingers.”
“I’ll leave you alone and go meet them Ma’am.”
“Very well Coates. Dismissed.”
Deck of the USS Seahawk
Mediterranean Sea
“Welcome aboard Commander Rabb...Colonel Mackenzie,” greeted PO Coates as Harm and Mac stepped off the COD.
“Good to see you again Petty Officer Coates,” greeted Mac.
Harm grinned at his young protege. “How’s carrier life these days, Coates?”
“Unusual sir, but I like it.”
“Good for you. Staying out of trouble?”
“As much as I can working for Lt. Witch, Sir.”
“Excuse me?” Mac asked. “Care to explain your statement, Petty Officer,” asked Colonel Mackenzie going into full investigative mode.
“Sorry Ma’am...last year when Lt. Singer accused me of stealing her bracelet and I ran, I referred to her as a witch. The Commander corrected me and told me I was to call her Lt. Witch.”
“Commander Rabb?” Mac drilled him with a glare, but Harm saw through it and flashed his grin.
“Hey, I was trying to get her to be more respectful.”
“I see...well, we better get up to the bridge and report in. We’ll catch you later Coates.”
“Yes Ma’am. See you later sir.”
Once inside, Coates returned to the JAG office, while Harm and Mac reported in to the Captain.
Three Hours Later
Outside the JAG Office on the carrier
“Hey Mac... You okay?” Harm had greeted Mac and then noticed the tension in her face.
“I’m fine. Where are they letting us work?”
“JAG office.”
“Great!”
“What’s going on Mac?”
“I just interviewed Lt. Singer...have you seen her yet?”
“No.”
“She is obviously pregnant, Harm...and she refuses to name the father. She swears he is not on board ship. I wonder if she even knows who the father is.”
“Mac...” Harm was going to caution her to relax a little, but when Mac interrupted him again, he thought better of it.
“I will get to the bottom of this. I’m going to the Com to place a secure call. You get the job of evicting her from the office so we can work.”
“Gee thanks. Coates in here?”
“No, I sent her off to secure our quarters. She’s suppose to meet us here in one hour.”
“Great...you will pay for this Mac,” he grinned.
Harm opened the door to the JAG office after watching her wave as she walked away. He stepped into the office as Loren turned sideways and Harm gasped at her obvious pregnancy. She had to be five or six months pregnant. He hadn’t expected this. He had a vision of his brother driving away with her before he had returned to Russia.
“Need a camera, Commander?” Loren Singer’s voice dripped with sarcasm.
“No...sorry...I just wasn’t expecting to see you...How far along are you Lieutenant?”
“None of your business, sir.”
“Is this my brother’s baby?”
“Your brother? Nice kid Commander, but too innocent for me.”
“Listen, Lt. Singer, I have been instructed to tell you that you are ordered to vacate the JAG office as your quarters and your office until further notice. Petty Officer Coates is securing alternative quarters for you and you are relieved of duty until further notice.”
“What is this? First that nosy Lt. Colonel and now you? You have no right asking me personal questions, Commander, and if you do I will find a way to embarrass both of you and put you in the position of being asked thousands of personal questions that are no ones business but your own.”
“Watch it, Lieutenant. That’s pretty close to a threat,” Harm cautioned the upset young officer.
“That’s not a threat, Commander, it’s a promise!” Singer stuffed her belongings into a bag and stormed from the office.
Harm flinched as the door slammed. “That went well.”
Outside the JAG Office
Petty Officer Coates was just reaching for the JAG office door, when it had flown open before slamming shut behind a furious pregnant JAG officer making a hurried exit.
“Lt. Singer, I have alternate quarters for you.”
“Just tell me where and then get out of my way.”
“Yes Ma’am,” Coates agreed. She proceeded to tell the Lieutenant her new quarters and Singer waddled down the corridor with her head high, muttering to herself all the way. “They have no right to be so self righteous! Just because they are both beautiful, talented, intelligent people and too damn lucky to describe, they think they can get away with anything....well, I can make them pay.” She reached into her pocket for the cell phone she kept there. It’s all she needed to make this work.
Once in her new quarters, she punched in the number she knew would connect her to the first step of her revenge on the two beautiful and arrogant JAGS that stood between her and her chance to become the first woman JAG. And to think she thought she could convince that arrogant jetjock to even look at her twice!
She heard the voice come on the line and she smiled. “Hi...It’s Loren...I have a scoop for you.”
The voice obviously knew her. “Really...and can you back up your claims this time?”
“Yes.”
“Alright...what have you got for me?”
“How about two senior JAG officers that have been having an affair for years?”
“Keep talking.”
“I have pictures that prove these two are romantically involved, and according to the UCMJ, their relationship makes it a conflict of interest for them to work in the same command or on any of the same cases.”
“What’s in it for you?”
“Revenge. I want them to have their names smeared...be embarrassed in public...that would do it for me. The pictures say it all. Can you get them to the Navy Times?”
“I’ll give it my best shot. When can I expect them?”
“In a few hours.”
Lorn Singer was good on her word. She took out a folder with a CD in it and accessed the computer in her temporary quarters. She booted it up, put in the CD and located the pictures in her file...the ones that would toast those two trouble making senior officers. It took a few minutes to pull up the pictures she wanted. The first one she had stumbled on to. It had made her aware of some things she had missed and kept her on alert for months.
The first picture on the screen wasn’t the best quality, but it was enough. She had attended the engagement party for Colonel Mackenzie and Commander Brumby out of curiosity. She had slipped her digital camera into her purse that night on a whim. There hadn’t been room in her too tight dress for pockets, but the slender digital camera had fit in her purse.
When Commander Rabb had broken off their conversation that night to follow the Colonel outside, she had worked her way slowly around the room, removed the camera from her purse and quietly slipped out onto the porch behind them. She had heard their voices and then nothing but a moan. She had turned the corner, just in time to see the Commander reach for the Colonel and haul her up against him. He had kissed her with a hunger that left Loren aching for someone to desire her like that. Her fantasies of the Commander had faded years before when he had come to close to catching her in the act of setting up her biggest rival - then Major Sarah Mackenzie.
The following Christmas, after Mic and Mac’s wedding had been called off, the Hrm and Mac had tied for second behind Commander Turner at the JAG-A-thon, and then the Petty Officer had shown up with Rabb at the Christmas party. They had all headed for their cars to go to the service. At the last second, she had turned back toward the apartment to use the bathroom one more time. She had watched the Commander and Colonel stare into each others eyes and then lean toward each other. She had caught their kiss under the mistletoe and his raised eyebrows that had looked like he was making a silent promise for more later when they were alone. She had turned then and slid into the car before they had stepped outside to catch her spying on them.
She had snapped a few other pictures that night as well. It seemed they were never far away from each other and usually looking into each others eyes.
It wasn’t long after that she had met Rabb’s half brother, Sergei. He was cute, and well built, but smaller then his brother. Sergei’s interest in her got her thinking. She might be able to strike up a friendship with him and then get pertinent information about his brother and his relationship to Colonel Mackenzie.
Singer thought about the day she had gone to Rabb’s apartment and snooped around. She had been looking for things to use against him by them, but hadn’t found much, other then a few pictures, which she had used her camera to get her own pictures of.
There was the one of them holding a baby which she eventually figured out was a christening of their godson...but the picture would cast doubts and aspersions on their characters so she included it in the file she was preparing. When she was done, she had a collection of six photos that should do the trick. Revenge was sweet.
PART 2
Next Day
JAG Headquarters
Washington, D.C.
“Admiral?” called PO Jason Tiner, as he hung up the phone just as Admiral Chegwidden sailed by his desk.
“What is it Tiner?”
“Sir, I have Captain Greason on line two for you sir.”
“Greason...isn’t he with the Navy Times?”
“Yes sir.”
“What’s he want?”
“He said that he needs to talk to you to verify some information he received.”
“Alright Tiner, I’ll take the call.” AJ shut his door, and moved to his desk as he set down his briefcase and cover. “What can I do for you Captain Greason?”
“Admiral Chegwidden, do you have a Commander Harmon Rabb and a Lt. Colonel Sarah Mackenzie in your command?”
“Yes. Why do you ask?”
“Can you tell me exactly what their relationship is?”
“They were partners as junior officers and now that they are both senior officers they are friends, colleagues, and valuable members of this staff.”
“When you say friends...do you mean your friends, or friends with each other?” queried Greason.
“Why do you ask?”
“Why are you avoiding my question?”
“Look Captain, Rabb and Mackenzie are two of my best. They have worked together and as opposing counsel many times over the years, and I know with them on a case, we will get to the truth. So, if you won’t explain to me why you are asking these questions,” AJ paused for effect as his nostrils flared, “I’ll bid you good day.”
“I don’t think you want to do that sir.”
“Why?”
“I have received a collection of pictures that shows them in both civilian attire and in uniform in compromising positions.”
“Sounds like they were clothed, so it can’t be too compromising,” AJ muttered.
“Sir, I don’t think this is a joke. I’ve faxed them to you with a confidential cover. Look at them and then call me back with a statement. I can sit on these pictures for about two hours. After that, I’m going public with them.”
“Captain, I don’t like threats.” Disconnecting the call, AJ bellowed, “Tiner! Get me the confidential fax being sent as we speak.”
“Aye, aye sir.”
The admiral watched Tiner scurry to collect the fax, while he covered his head with his hands and muttered, “What have you two gone and done now?”
USS Seahawk
Mediterranean Sea
“Harm, I see no other course of action. You take Singer back with you and report to Chegwidden, and I’ll stay here on board as the JAG for the next two weeks until we dock at Norfolk.”
“When did they decide to return to base?” Harm demanded.
“They got the call about an hour ago.”
“Did you talk to Chegwidden?”
“No, but the Captain suggested one of return with Singer - he really wants her off this ship - and the other stay on board for the two weeks until we get to Norfolk.”
“I hate to leave you stranded out here Mac.”
“Harm, I think escorting Singer back to headquarters could be the tougher assignment. You finished the incident report and cleared everyone. The Captain’s happy, or will be with Singer gone. It will be fine.”
“I’m not sure I agree.”
“What, you want to stay on board for two weeks - and not be able to fly?”
“It’s not that Mac.”
“Then what is it? Tell me Harm.”
“I don’t like being away from you for two weeks...Hell, I don’t like being away from you for two days anymore.”
“You don’t?”
“No.”
“Harm, why now?”
“Why not now?”
“Ahhrrrggggg....you drive me nuts when you answer a question with a question!”
“I know...so we’re even.”
“Do I want to know how you figure that one.?”
Harm shrugged. “You drive me nuts, too” Flashing his grin he added, “I’ll collect Singer and catch the next COD. I’ll see you in two weeks at Norfolk.”
“I’m counting on it.”
Little did they know when they parted on the USS Seahawk that day, that their lives were about to change and in a very public way. This was not something that either of them had counted on.
Dulles International Airport
Washington D.C.
Loren Singer and Harm deplaned after a silent flight. Ever since their conversation on the COD, when Harm had tried to find out if his brother was the father of her baby, Loren had refused to speak to him. They were crossing the terminal to claim their bags when Harm took out his cell phone to turn it on. It rang immediately.
“Rabb.”
“I want you both to report to my office immediately.”
“Aye, aye sir. We should be there in thirty minutes if the traffic cooperates.”
“Make sure it does.” The line went dead when the Admiral hung up.
Harm glanced at his phone then flipped it shut. “We got to move. Admiral wants to see us both.”
“What for?” Loren nearly snarled.
“He didn’t say, but something has him barking orders.”
“Really?” Loren began to smile realizing that he must have received the pictures she had forwarded to her contact. “Well, we wouldn’t want to keep him waiting.”
They retrieved their bags and found Tiner waiting for them when they exited the terminal.
“What’s up Tiner?”
“Couldn’t say sir.”
“Couldn’t or wouldn’t?” Harm asked with raised brows. “Never mind Tiner, I’ll found out soon. Does the Admiral know you’re picking us up?”
“No sir. I had to bring some dignitaries to catch their flight, so I thought I’d wait seeing as you were due in within minutes anyway.”
“Thanks. Let’s go then.” Harm waited for Loren to get in the car and then slid in next to Tiner after shutting her door. “How’s Lt. Roberts doing?”
“Making progress he says sir.”
Tiner and Rabb chatted on the way to JAG while Loren sat in the backseat thinking about what was about to go down. She hoped she was there to see Rabb’s reaction when he saw those pictures. In her mind she tried on different levels of shock and outrage to see which one would set the right tone and keep her part in the situation hidden. By the time they arrived at Chegwidden’s door, she knew just how she wanted to play this scene.
“ENTER!”
“Lt. Singer and Commander Rabb reporting as ordered sir,” Harm announced as they came to attention in front of his desk.
“What to ....? Where’s Mackenzie? Singer, why are you here?” Admiral Chegwidden asked clearly puzzled.
“Sir, you said you wanted to see us both.”
“Yeah, you and Mackenzie.”
“Sorry sir, I thought you knew. The captain demanded that Singer return with me so Colonel Mackenzie stayed on board. They’ll be docking in Norfolk in two weeks sir.”
“Fine. Lt. Singer, I want a current medical report on my desk before you return to duty. In the meantime, you can see what other duty stations are looking for someone of your rank. Dismissed.”
“Sir?”
“What part of dismissed are you not understanding Lieutenant?”
“Aye, aye sir.” Loren, clearly disappointed at being asked to leave, stomped out of the admiral’s office and almost slammed the door behind her.
“At ease. I’d prefer to have both you and Mac here for this, but it can’t wait.”
“What is it sir?”
“I received a fax with six photos that I’d like your reaction to.” The admiral pushed a manilla folder toward Harm across the top of his desk.
Harm picked it up, glanced at the Admiral, opened the folder and looked down at the first picture. His knees nearly buckled as he looked at the grayscale photo in front of him. He couldn’t tear his eyes away, while his mind tried to process what he was seeing.
“That is you and the Colonel on my porch isn’t it?” AJ asked, his voice surprisingly soft, his anger no longer evident after seeing the look on his officers face.
“Yes.”
“Want to tell me what was going on?”
“Not really sir.”
“Talk to me, son, and maybe I can keep a lid on this...or at least will be able to launch some damage control.”
“I’m not sure what to say.”
“Look at the other pictures first...maybe that will help you,” suggested the admiral.
Harm turned to the next page and he couldn’t stop his grin. That was almost a year ago at Bud and Harriet’s Christmas party before they went to the service at the chapel together. Things had been going so well between them, that when they found themselves under the mistletoe they had stolen a kiss. They didn’t know anyone was around taking pictures, but someone apparently had been - more then once.
Harm looked at the other pictures, all of him and Mac. In every picture they were kissing or looking deep into each others eyes. Even Harm knew that the feelings between him and Mac were pretty obvious looking at those pictures.
“Have you talked about your feelings with each other?” AJ quietly asked.
“No. How much trouble are we in here sir?” Harm asked thinking of all the cases that they had worked as opposing counsel. He hoped they wouldn’t all need to be reviewed to determine if the trials and outcomes had been fair. For a man that believed in the truth to the extent he did, he wanted not halo of doubts surrounding their work.
“With me...none...right now. I would like to hear what you have to say about it all.”
“Sir, I know I had a chance to tell Mac how I felt before she got involved with Brumby, but I wasn’t ready to make a commitment to her...at least not completely. I did try to let her know I saw her in my future.”
“And because you hadn’t declared yourself you didn’t see fit to let me know how you were feeling?” the admiral guessed.
“Yes sir. I figured if it was one sided then it didn’t matter...but we had worked so hard to rebuild our friendship, I just didn’t want to risk it again.”
The Admiral reached for one of the pictures of Harm gazing into Mac’s eyes. “When you look at her that way...what do you see?”
“I see...a desirable woman.”
“And I see ...a man who’s so afraid to lose control.”
“In my world, you lose control, you die,” Harm reminded the Admiral.
“Maybe when you were flying, Commander, but not as a JAG officer. You’ve got to let go of that lifeline before it becomes a noose.”
“No sir...I have to hold on to that lifeline...if I don’t I’ll lose her for good...and my career.”
“You think if you deny your feelings for her - for each other - you’re going to get anywhere? Come on Rabb. Where will this thing take you if you don’t open up...tell her what you feel...accept that she feels the same for you too?”
“I don’t know she feels the same sir.”
“I do. I saw her when you were lost at sea. I saw the way she fought to be strong for you. I also saw her struggle to face her feelings and then accept them. You may be surprised Commander. Let go of that lifeline of yours and face this thing head on. You might find things turn out better then you had hoped.”
“Who sent these pictures sir?” Harm asked needing space from where the conversation had swept them.
“Captain Greason with the Navy Times called me. He wanted me to have a chance to find out what was going on before he was forced to publish them as part of an expose’ on corruption in the JAG ranks.”
“We haven’t done anything illegal sir.”
“I know that...but even the hint of impropriety can be enough to cause scuttlebutt that can sink the Navy and the Marine Corps. We need to come up with an explanation and a plausible enough statement to take the steam out of this thing up front. Got any ideas?”
“Not at the moment.”
“I say we call Mac and tell her about the pictures. Perhaps then we can put our heads together and come up with a plan of action.”
“Aye, aye sir.”
“Get Mac on the speaker phone. I’ll have Tiner fax these to her.” The Admiral took the folder to give to Tiner to fax to Colonel Mackenzie on board the USS Seahawk.
Meanwhile, Harm was placing the call to the ship. Mac was not in the JAG office, so he had to leave a message for her to collect the file being faxed and then to call him in Admiral Chegwidden’s office ASAP.
Atlantic Ocean
USS Seahawk
“Colonel Mackenzie!” called Petty Officer Coates as she tracked down the temporary JAG.
“Yes Coates?”
“Sorry Ma’am. You have an urgent message to review this file and call Commander Rabb immediately. They are waiting in Admiral Chegwidden’s office for your call, Ma’am.”
“Thank you Jennifer. Any idea what’s going on?”
“No Ma’am...but the Commander sounded odd, Ma’am.”
“Odd?”
“Yes...like he was upset but trying not to be.”
“Thank you Coates.” Mac hurried back to the JAG office which also served as her quarters. She opened the file as she hurried along and almost tripped. Pictures of her wrapped in Harm’s arms; pictures of their lips lingering; gazing into one another’s eyes; holding baby AJ looking as if it was their own child they were holding...what was going on? Rushing the final distance to the office, she called the familiar number at home and asked for Admiral Chegwidden’s office.
[Admiral Chegwidden]
“Sir, its Colonel Mackenzie...I got the file and the message. Commander Rabb?”
[I’m right here Mac.]
“Where did these come from?”
[I received a call from Captain Greason with the Navy Times. They have been working on a piece that had to do with corruption and he wants me to give him a statement explaining how this isn’t an indication that there is wide spread corruption among our JAG officers in the field. He’s going to use these pictures to embarrass both of you, JAG Headquarters and the Navy and Marine Corps in general.]
“But sir,” Mac started not sure what to say as she looked at the pictures again. “We have never crossed the line.”
[I believe you Mac, but as I said to Harm, even the hint of impropriety...]
“I know sir...who took these pictures...I mean the one of us with the baby looks like a picture of a picture...I mean we each have a copy of the picture taken at little AJ’s christening...but how did they get a picture of it?”
[Where’s your picture Mac?]
“At home in my bedroom on the dresser.”
[Mines on the book case at home...just inside the door.]
[It could be someone was in your apartment and took a picture of the picture. Mac, I asked Harm to tell me about these pictures. I’d like to hear what you have to say too.]
“Do I get to hear what Harm said?” Mac asked in an attempt to hedge on the request.
[I hope so, but probably not until you get to Norfolk...and we need to come up with something now. I know its going to put you both on the spot, and I see what I see in those pictures, but I’ve got to ask - exactly what is your relationship to each other?]
[“Friends.”] they answered simultaneously.
[I have eyes and I can see those pictures. If I’m going to help you, you need to level with me...now. You both claim the truth is everything...well I’m about to put you both to the test. Harm, are your feelings for Mac more involved then friendship?] AJ asked his gaze locked on Harms.
Oh God...he’s going to know! Mac thought to herself as she listened to what AJ was asking Harm and waiting for his answer.
[Yes sir.]
[Mac, are your feelings for Harm more involved then friendship?]
Mac sighed. She could do this. “Yes sir.”
[Is there any kind of commitment between the two of you?] AJ was greeted with a silent pause. [Harm...Mac...is there a commitment between the two of you?] He almost didn’t hear the faint yes each of them whispered. [Okay...let’s hear it.]
[When little AJ was born, Mac was feeling down...everything was changing...Chloe was leaving...I was heading back to the carrier...she was still trying to put her life together after her husband showed up, the murder trial and the stalker...anyway, I promised her that if neither of us was in a relationship in five years, we’d go halves on a kid...have a baby together...we shook on it.]
“Harm doesn’t go back on his promises sir,” Mac whispered, from her seat at the desk where she landed when her knees buckled when Harm admitted to their deal to the Admiral.
[There’s another year and a half to go on our deal sir.]
[Have you ever acted on your feelings for each other?]
“Sir?”
[I’m not sure I understand your question, Admiral.]
[Why doesn’t that surprise me? Alright Rabb...have you two had sex? Is that plain and simple enough for you?]
[Yes sir...no sir...I mean...]
Mac could picture Harm blushing as the Admiral grilled him and was glad neither of them could see her blush or smile.
[At ease Rabb...are you engaged?]
[No]
[Married?]
[No sir.]
[Why not?]
[Sir?]
“Sir?”
[Look, I’m trying to find a solution here...and I may be on to something. Would it be fair to say that the fact you work together has stopped you from opening up about your feelings for each other and made either of you hesitate to make a commitment to the other?]
“Yes sir...that would be very accurate from my standpoint,” Mac admitted feeling more at ease now. Maybe this was what they needed to get everything out of the table.
[I agree sir.]
[Very well. I’m going to put a plan together. We’ll contact you later to fill you in, Mac.]
“I’ll be waiting for your call sir.”
[Dismissed.]
Once the call disconnected, the Admiral turned to Harm. “I want you to see if you can get a handle on who might want to blackmail either or both of you and who would have done this that was at those gatherings. Bring Bud in on this. It will keep his mind occupied...talk it over with him at his house. I’ll call you later.”
“Yes sir.”
PART 3
Admiral Chegwidden looked at the pictures again. He grabbed the phone and placed another call to Colonel Mackenzie aboard the USS Seahawk.
[Colonel Mackenzie.]
“Sorry, Mac...but I need to ask you some more questions...without Harm listening in.”
[Thank you sir...what do you want to know.]
“Did you know how deep your feelings for Rabb were when you were planning to marry Mic?”
[No sir...I mean I thought of him as my best friend still...and at my engagement party, I thought we had more or less agreed that we were good friends and would always love each other as friends...I mean he never indicated he wanted anything more from me before. We even talked about the deal and I told him it was null and void. I seriously thought that we had put any lingering doubts behind us that there was any romantic interest between us. I leaned into him to kiss him goodbye and as I stepped back, he reached for me...and somehow someone got a picture of us... I know it looks bad, Admiral.]
“Maybe not that bad, Mac. Harm’s trying to figure out who would take the pictures and who might want to blackmail one or both of you. We’ll keep you posted on that. Now, a couple of more questions....”
[Alright sir.]
“Did the two of you ever sleep together on any cases you were assigned?”
[Define, ‘sleep together’ sir.]
“Mmaacccc...I mean had sex...you’re as bad as Rabb,” he muttered under his breath making Mac smile.
[No sir. There were times we had to sleep in close proximity to one another...like in the desert in Afghanistan and years ago when the poachers shot me...but no sir, no carnal knowledge of one another.]
“Good. Now the tough one Mac....do you love him?”
[Yes sir....as more then a friend.]
“Would it be fair to say that if your careers were not an issue and he asked you to marry him, you’d agree?”
[That would be a fair assumption sir.]
“How do you like being on a carrier Mac?” a crazy idea entered his head before he forgot it just a s quickly.
[Short term its not bad...but I miss my own bed.]
“I hear you Colonel...look, I’ll fill Rabb in and then have him get in touch with you as to what our statement should be.”
[Aye, aye, sir.]
Once again AJ sat back against his seat and thought. There was a simple solution. If he transferred one or both of them out of his command, then they would be free to get on with their lives. If they were to announce their engagement after a seven year courtship, the scuttlebutt would die...they’d look like heroes sacrificing their personal relationships, hopes and dreams, for their country. The solution seemed simple...getting Rabb and Mackenzie to agree to it...well, who knew anymore how these two would react.
Chegwidden fired up his computer to see what openings appropriate to 05 officers would be available in the area. The answer was so easy that Chegwidden almost missed it. The Joint Chiefs were looking for a JAG advisor and preferred Navy or Marine Corps to fill the opening. AJ picked up the phone and called Admiral Kly.
“I understand you’re looking for a cutting edge advisor for the Joint Chiefs.”
[We are...want to give me Rabb?]
“Maybe.”
[What did he do to get on your bad side, AJ?]
“Nothing...I don’t want to lose him, but I need to reassign either Rabb or Mackenzie to another command before they come unhinged.”
[Too many arguments?]
“No...too much UST.”
[UST? You lost me, AJ.]
“Yes, well let’s just say if they decide to get married, I need to move one out of my command.”
[Married huh?]
“Yeah...I’d like to keep them close though...if I don’t I can’t see either one giving up their career at this point...maybe in a few years.”
[I suppose you want to borrow Rabb to try cases when we don’t need him.]
“That would be perfect,” AJ agreed.
[You know we all want Rabb...so yes...I’ll take him if you are serious...and I’ll let him work cases when you need him...and we don’t.]
“Thank you Admiral Kly.”
[My pleasure Admiral Chegwidden.]
Roberts Residence
Falls Church
“Commander Rabb...it’s good to see you. Come on in.”
“Thanks Bud. Harriet out?”
“She took AJ to return some movies and pick up a few more.”
“Look Bud, I’ve got a sensitive issue I’m working on, and the Admiral suggested you might be perfect to help with this.”
“I’d like to help if I can sir.”
“Bud, someone appears to be trying to blackmail Mac and me...they’ve followed us and taken pictures of us...private pictures when we thought we were alone.” Harm couldn’t hide his smile when he saw Bud blush as he handed him the folder with the duplicate pictures Harm had made for the file. “It’s nothing like that, Bud.”
“Mac and Mic’s engagement party?”
“Yeah.”
“Isn’t this one...and these...in front of our old apartment?”
“I think so.”
“It had to be someone that’s been here before....that is from our JAG office.”
“But who? Who really isn’t happy with us, Bud?”
“It’s obvious sir...Lt. Singer.”
“I should have thought of that myself. Thanks Bud. I’m glad God didn’t let anything happen to that mind of yours.”
“Glad I could help, sir. What’s going to happen to you and the Colonel because of all this?” Bud asked, concern for his commanding officer and friends apparent on his face.
“That depends on the Admiral Bud. He’s asked us a lot of personal and pointed questions. I think he’s got some ideas as to how to counteract the potential fall out so that the Navy doesn’t get burned, but I don’t know if there will be fall out on Mac and myself yet.”
“With all due respect sir, you and the Colonel have...denied anything other then a professional and friendly relationship for years, but to the rest of us...”
“Go ahead Bud...we’re friends and I’m in your home. Say it.”
“Well it just seems that you and the Colonel have a connection sir that’s closer even then the one between Harriet and myself. In some ways, you’ve been like a married couple since you first met. I mean, I remember the tension between you when you first met, and I never thought it was because she and Lt. Schonke looked alike.”
“You didn’t?”
“No sir...I mean I know her appearance shocked you when you first saw her, the same way it did me and Keeter, but they were nothing alike personalities wise.”
“You’re right Bud...I felt different toward Mac immediately. I did think part of it was her appearance, but I knew right away that Mac had an impact on me that Diane never did. I loved Diane as a friend, and if she hadn’t been killed, I might have convinced myself I loved her as something the more then that.”
“The way the Colonel did with Mic.”
“You’re right Bud. I hadn’t thought of it that way before...but you’re right.”
“What are you going to do now sir?”
“Well Bud, I’m going to go see Admiral Chegwidden and tell him what we came up with. I’m going to listen to his plan. And when Mac gets home, I think I’ll find a way to convince her to sit down and hear me out.”
“If you need help sir...” Bud trailed off as he and Harm exchanged smiles.
“I’ll let you know if I do. Thanks agin Bud. You’re a good friend. Anything you need before I go?”
“I’m good sir.”
“Stay there Bud...I’ll see myself out.”
JAG Office
USS Seahawk
“Ma’am?”
“Yes Jennifer.”
“You seem preoccupied. Is something wrong?”
“Have a seat. I’m waiting for the Admiral or Commander Rabb to call me back. Do you have any idea who might have taken some photos of the Commander and me together on Christmas Eve?”
“I saw a few people with cameras Ma’am. It’s not surprising that someone would take pictures of you two together.”
“Why’s that Jennifer?”
“Because you two look so good together.”
“Oh...Anyway, when we left the Roberts’ to go to the chapel, did you see anyone come out just before Harm and me?”
“Not that I recall...wait a minute...I had been...watching...Lt. Singer and she did go back inside but she wasn’t gone long. She came out seconds before you and the Commander. I thought she had forgotten something but discovered the door was already locked when she went back in. She had a camera that night.”
“That would fit...thanks Jen.” Mac reached for the phone. “You may have given me the missing piece of the puzzle...Admiral Chegwidden please. This is Lt. Colonel Sarah Mackenzie.”
Admiral Chegwidden’s Office
JAG Headquarters
Washington D.C.
“Yes Tiner?”
“Commander Rabb to see you, sir, and Colonel Mackenzie is on line three.”
“Send in Rabb and I’ll take the call...”Mac, hold on....at ease Rabb...Mac I put you on speaker phone...Harm’s here too.”
[“It’s Singer.”] Mac’s voice on the phone and Rabb’s voice in the room spoke at the same time once again.
“I guess that’s unanimous then...what do you have for evidence to back it up?”
“Go ahead Mac.”
“Thanks Harm...Coates remembered seeing Singer go back into Bud and Harriet’s building while she was waiting for us outside, but Singer wasn’t gone long and she came out of the building seconds before we did. Coates remembers seeing her snapping a few pictures that evening.”
“Bud and I came up with Singer too. She was at the engagement party and the Christmas party. She has been after Mac since the beginning. She didn’t like it when I told her I was onto her and watching her. I told her I would take her down if I ever had proof of some of the stuff I think she was behind.”
“Not only that sir, she’s not happy that I was here to investigate her medical condition and that she was shipped home early,” Mac added.
“I may have made it worse because I think I know who the father of her baby is.”
[“You do?”] This time is was Mac and the Admiral speaking in unison.
“Yeah...my brother, Sergei. They were pretty tight at the end...she took him to the airport and he had been out with her a couple of nights before that.”
[The timing would be about right...]
“I asked security to pick Singer up and bring her in for questioning,” Harm added.
“You will not conduct this investigation any further, Rabb.” Admiral Chegwidden punched the buttons on the phone, “Tiner, I want to see Major Barnes in my office ASAP...check with NCIS if he’s not still in the courthouse. If security arrives with Singer, have them wait with her in the conference room.”
“What do we do now sir?”
“You Rabb, need to clear your cases. Starting tomorrow you will be working with Admiral Kly and the Joint Chiefs as their advisor. Admiral Kly will lend you out to me when you are not needed or not in session. Colonel Mackenzie, you’ll catch the next COD back to DC and report in to me tomorrow morning. I’ll need you in Washington, Mac. Coates can handle anything that comes up and get it to us here until they dock.”
[Yes sir.]
“Harm, you pick up Mac and then go talk about what got us here in the first place. I’m calling Captain Greason and giving him this statement.” Admiral Chegwidden adjusted his glasses before he read the statement he had prepared. “This is a situation where two excellent officers felt duty bound to put their oath to their country before their feelings for each other. Once I became aware of the conflict they were dealing with, I arranged to transfer one of them to another command. This has freed them from any military restrictions that would prevent two senior officers from pursuing a more personal relationship if they so chose. It would appear that these photos were simply candid moments and someone has chosen to use them to try and humiliate and embarrass these two officers and the Navy. They will be found and prosecuted.”
[Thank you Admiral.]
“Yes...thank you. Mac, let me know where to pick you up and the time. We’re going to have that talk.”
[I agree Harm. It’s time to name the tune we’ve been dancing too all these years.]
“Alright...alright...enough touchy feely stuff. Clear out of my office. Talk to you tomorrow Colonel.”
[Aye, aye sir.]
Conference Room
JAG Headquarters
“What do you mean I’m being interrogated? By who? Under whose authority?” Lt. Loren Singer was showing signs of coming unraveled as she waited for the questioning to begin. The guards just stood still and silent ignoring her outbursts.
Loren had just arrived at her apartment when security had picked her up and hauled her back to JAG. She hadn’t had time to change out of her uniform, and the tightness around her waist was getting painful.
“I can’t believe the Navy is going to go to these extremes to uncover the father of this baby,” she mumbled under her breath. She looked up hearing the door open.
“Lt. Loren Singer?”
“Yes. Who wants to know?”
“Major Michael Barnes. I’m a Marine lawyer currently TAD to NCIS getting more experience in investigations.”
“So why am I being investigated?”
Major Barnes sat back and watched the female Lieutenant through squinted eyes. She was definitely playing it cool and not giving away a thing. Admiral Chegwidden had briefed him upstairs. Now it was his job to get her to open up to him. “Lt. Singer, did you attend an engagement party for Lt. Colonel Sarah Mackenzie and Commander Michael Brumby at the home of Admiral AJ Chegwidden?”
“Yes. Most of JAG was there.”
“Were you also at a Christmas Eve party last year at the home of Harriet and Bud Roberts?”
“Yes. What is this all about?”
“I’m asking the questions Lt. Singer. Do you own a camera?”
“Doesn’t every one?”
“What kind is it?”
“I don’t know...its digital.”
“How do you save your pictures?”
“I save them onto CDs unless I want to print them out.”
“Have you ever taken any pictures of Commander Harmon Rabb Junior and Lt. Colonel Sarah Mackenzie?”
“I don’t know...I guess they were in some group shots I took.”
“Where do you keep your CDs?”
“At home in my desk.”
“Would you give permission to search your home or would you be willing to hand over those CDs for us to study?”
“What? No!”
“Why not Lieutenant? What are you trying to hide?”
“Nothing.”
“I don’t think so. I think you have the pictures on a CD that match the ones sent to Admiral Chegwidden. Are you going to hand over the CDs or force us to get a search warrant?”
“Better try to get your warrant...I can have it blocked.”
“How would you do that?”
“Make a few calls.”
“Oh, so you have other pictures on other people in the legal or judicial field that you plan to threaten the judges with to get your way?”
“I never said that!” shouted Singer, her composure slipping at the quiet unassuming approach of Major Barnes.
“Calm down, Lt. Singer...its not good for your baby for you to get so upset.”
“Screw the kid! I planned to get rid of it...tomorrow...but I need to see when I can get a flight to San Diego. I have nine days left to get an abortion. Don’t stand in my way!”
“Lt. Singer, you are not doing yourself any favors here. I have been charged with conducting this investigation to determine if there is enough evidence to prosecute you for blackmail and conduct unbecoming. Your lack of cooperation is raising questions.”
“I know my rights and you are suppose to provide me with counsel.”
“That’s true - after you’ve been charged. You haven’t been charged - yet.”
PART 4
Harm leaned against the front of the corvette, his ankles crossed. He had gone home and changed into civilian clothes before making the drive to Pax River to pick up Mac from the COD.
As Mac exited the plane, she saw Harm parked just outside the gate. She had to smile. The man looked good enough to eat in those well worn jeans that were so soft to the touch, his beige body hugging sweater and his leather jacket. Even his well worn athletic shoes looked good on him. He pushed off the Corvette and started walking toward her.
Their eyes met and held as they walked closer and closer together. Mac bit her lip as she realized that one of her favorite daydreams just might come true. When she had been with Brumby he had often met her after a return flight. While she was usually glad to see him, her heart didn’t accelerate as it had just now seeing Harm waiting for her. The closer he got the more intense his gaze. In her daydreams he had always taken her into his arms and kissed her.
They were almost toe to toe and Mac felt her breath catch in her lungs as he bent forward and his mouth moved closer to her. Her eyes closed as she felt the silky soft brush of his lips against her own. She was powerless to keep hers from responding, even if they were in the broad daylight.
“I’ve wanted to do that so many times,” Harm whispered as he stood up again, his smile almost blinding.
“Really?”
“Yes.”
“I’ve always wished you would greet me like that when I got home.”
“Shall we go to my place or yours to talk?”
“Can we go to my place so I can shower and put on civies?”
“Of course. While you shower and change I’ll get some food ready for us.”
“Probably not much in my cupboards,” Mac warned.
“I’ll run to the store, then. You go relax.”
“Thanks,” Mac smiled and Harm reminded himself to breathe when he saw her appearance change from cool, efficient, Marine to soft and gentle woman. It was one of the many things about her that fascinated him.
Harm had dropped Mac off before heading for the store. She had leaned toward him, her face raised for a quick kiss, before slipping out of the Corvette. Harm watched her cross the street before starting up the stairs to her place. He couldn’t believe that they were finally in a position to act on their feelings and find out exactly how deep and real they were. As he headed for the store he thought about all the reasons he hadn’t been ready to explore what they had between them.
When he had left JAG to return to a flight squadron, part of him had done it to get space from the two women in his life - Mac and Jordan. He had been trying to figure out why he couldn’t commit to Jordan and what his growing fascination with Mac and finding ways to tie her to him - to his life. It had led to the baby deal they had made. He knew then, when Mac had agreed to it, that she wanted to be tied to him too.
When Jordan had walked out and broken things off, because he hadn’t talked it over with him, he had realized that it had been a huge mistake, but one that he knew he’s repeat again. Mac had been upset too, but he had chalked it up to the timing and the fact that she had a lot of losses hitting at the same time. Even being hurt Mac had not walked away. In some ways she had wanted to be closer to him. She had started popping up in his office when he least expected it. The day he had left JAG, she had waited for him in his office. He had closed the door to give them a more private good-bye. He was still sorting out his feelings when she had asked him if he was in love...well not quite that way.
They had been talking about how he had wished her well when she had left JAG and he reminded her that she had been in love. She had looked at him with tears shimmering in her big brown eyes and asked, “And you’re not?”
Her words had hit him hard. He felt the tears come to his eyes making them shiny too and deflected her by asking, “What’s love got to do with it?”
But he had known then that the feelings he had for Mac were love. He didn’t know if it was the love of a friend or something more but he knew he had to find out and he had hoped being away would help him sort things out. It hadn’t of course at least about Mac.
He learned that he still loved to fly but he missed being a lawyer. And when he returned he learned that he was jealous as hell that she had appeared to move on with Mic Brumby. He had never gotten past that situation when Brumby had tried to hang Mac out to dry during the murder trial. Even Bud had noticed it, especially when they were in Australia.
Sydney, Australia kicked up its own set of memories, as Harm cashed out at the grocery store. Mac had wanted to start an affair with him while they were there. He had told her he wasn’t ready to do that. She had taken him by surprise. Some part of him knew that once Mac was his, he wouldn’t be able to let go, and if she wasn’t as ready as he was to make a long-term commitment they were setting themselves up for heartache. So he had put her off...and she had turned to Brumby.
By now the thoughts cascaded one over the other as he tried to figure out what he would say to her and how, but the memories wouldn’t stop either. They say you learn from history, so Harm let the memories in hoping he would learn from their history.
Mackenzie Residence
Georgetown
Mac stepped from the shower and wrapped herself in a fluffy yellow towel. She used another smaller towel on her head toweling her slightly longer hair dry before running a comb through it. She smoothed lotion on her arms, leg, and body before using a moisturizer on her face. Her toe nails and fingernails weren’t painted, and she longed to paint her toenails, but there was no time before Harm would return.
After drying off, she pulled on a pair of barely there panties and a matching bra that would give her light support - enough to be decent to entertain company but light enough to still be comfortable. She reached for a pair of sweat pants that were soft and comfortable but hesitated. She opted for the mini-dress instead. Having her long legs bare felt so good. She had worn pants on the ship every day. She felt like a woman...and sexy...in civilian clothes after being TAD. Mac loved the feeling. Besides, she had a hunch that Harm would like having access to her long bare legs. At least she hoped he would.
Harm bounded up the stairs to Mac’s apartment carrying the groceries. Between the grocery store and her apartment he had made an astounding realization. He knew the dance they had been doing the last year, since the Jag-a-thon...it was called dating. It had almost stopped him dead in his tracks when he realized that despite their best efforts to avoid a relationship and not get involved, they had actually been dating but calling it building a friendship. No wonder the idea of marriage and starting a family didn’t scare him silly anymore. All those questions he had harbored years ago when he had looked at Mac as a friend and partner while he had dated Annie, Jordan and even Renee had now been answered.
The baby deal had been a way to keep them connected, but they didn’t need that anymore as far as he was concerned. He loved Mac. They had been dating and he knew that he would never tire of her company. He loved her sassy comments and sarcasm to cover her doubts and insecurities. He loved how soft and touchable she looked at times when she allowed herself to be a woman while the Marine rested. He wanted to love her body too if she would let him. The quick kisses earlier had given him hope. At her door he hesitated deciding between letting himself in and knocking. Before he could decide, the door opened.
Mac went to opened the door for Harm when she heard him bounding up the stairs. He was just getting ready to knock when she opened it.
“Hey Sailor...what’s for dinner?” Mac asked.
Harm stood in front of her with a dazed expression on his face as his eyes dropped to follow her legs down to her barefeet and then back up until his eyes once again met hers. “Nice legs.”
“Chicken?”
“What?” Harm asked as Mac reached to pull him into the room.
“I asked what’s for dinner...you said nice legs...I asked, chicken?” Mac repeated.
“No yours.”
“We’re having my legs for dinner?” Mac asked teasing him further.
“I could go for that,” Harm whispered leaning closer to Mac.
With one hand braced against his chest to keep some distance and ultimately some perspective, Mac tried again. “Harm...what’s for dinner?”
“Oh...aahhhh...Spinach Salad, baby carrots, boiled potatoes and grilled chicken.”
“Sounds good. Let me help you get things ready.” Mac led him to the kitchen where they worked side by side comfortably preparing their meal.
Anyone that didn’t know them would have seen two people sharing a small space working together as if every move had been choreographed, a sign that they were in tune with one another as if they had worked side by side for years, hours at a time. You got the sense that they both knew exactly where the others was at all times without looking. They talked about little things as they worked, like Bud’s progress, the Admiral’s relationship with Meredith, the latest call from Chloe to Mac in which she still acted mad at Harm, despite Mac’s best efforts to get her to once again accept Harm and not see him as the reason that Mac and Mic’s wedding never happened.
When they had finished their meal and cleaned up, Harm’s patience was about gone. He wanted nothing more then to move their relationship forward, and get on with the next phase of their life now that careers wouldn’t be in their way. He sat on the couch and caught Mac’s hand. She stopped and looked down into his face.
“What?” Mac asked.
“Sit down...please?”
“I was going to,” Mac assured Harm.
“I mean right here...beside me.”
“Okay...” Mac sat beside him with barely an inch between their legs. “I’m sitting...beside you.”
“Mac, I’ve been thinking. Our careers aren’t in the way anymore...let’s get married and start our family now,” Harm said quickly, their eyes locked, his hand holding hers.
“Did you just move our deal to have a baby forward?” Mac asked stunned.
“No...I figured we could cancel that...we’d get married now instead.”
“Now? As in this year? This month? This week?”
“This week is fine with me.”
“Harm wait...no...”
“Are you telling me you don’t want to marry me?”
“Yes...No...just slow down will you?”
“Why?”
“Harm, we’ve been dancing around each other for years trying to figure out what this was between us. I only admitted a short time ago that what I felt for you was the real thing...and I fought to keep it under wraps. I need time to get use to this thing...and to name the tune we’re dancing to...I’m not sure we’re dancing t the same song.”
“Why?” Harm asked, a little hurt and a lot confused judging by the expression on his face.
“Most people date and talk about what they want in life...in their future. Then they when they are ready they admit they love the other person...then if things still feel right and they want the same things and share a time line, they agree to get married. Once they decide to marry, they discuss when they want to start their family. We’re missing a lot of steps, Harmon.”
“I disagree, Mac. The steps aren’t missing...and we’re discussing the tune and other things now.”
“Harm...”
“Wait, Mac...hear me out.”
She nodded her agreement that she would listen while he explained.
“You said we were missing steps and I disagree...we talked a lot about what we wanted...you want a great career, a good man, and lots and lots of comfortable shoes...and a family. You want a man that can understand and accept you for who you are, whether you’re in Marine mode, or civilian woman mode. You want someone that can accept your quirks and moods without question, hold you when you’re lonely and kick your butt when they put their mind to it...especially when they challenge you to excel. Am I close so far?”
“Yes, but...”
“No buts yet, Mac...I’m not done. I figure we’ve gotten to know each other very well over the years. We know we will always love each other...we’ve discussed it. As for dating, that’s what we’ve been doing since you got back from your TAD to Indonesia and the Philippines. That’s what this whole year has been about. Going out, getting to know each other outside of work and without friends always around. The name of the tune this past year has been dating. I know what I want Mac, and I think we’d be good together...will you marry me?”
“Harm....”
“You need more time to decide...fine, but do you think its going to take ten months to decide?” Harm asked in desperation as his hoped sank.
“Harm please...once again we’re not on the same time line...”
“Are you holding me to the baby deal time line...You just want to wait until another year is up?”
“Oooooohhhhhh! Harm Stop it and listen to me!” Mac practically shouted, grabbing his face with her palms and turning his face toward her, so she could get eye contact and hopefully control of this disaster waiting to happen.
“I’m listening...”
“Fine. Now you’ve made some good points...” Mac slid her thumbs over his lips to keep him from talking. “When you put it that way, we have dated this past year. And we do know each other...sometimes too well. I know that in Australia you were not ready to move on. I know that when you make a promise, you don’t back out on it. I know you have a soft spot for kids, and I know we care about each other. I found out today that I no longer have to keep my feelings hidden from you because of our careers. You’ve thought this all through and are ready to go full speed ahead.”
“And you’re not?” Harm asked through her thumbs.
“Harm, in Sydney, you weren’t ready yet. Tonight, I’m not ready. I need some time to adjust to this whole concept...what if I hate it?”
“You won’t...I’ll make sure of it.”
“Harm...don’t rush me.”
“Okay...how long do you need? Ten seconds....ten hours....ten weeks...ten months....ten years?”
“Stop it Harm. You’re being childish.”
“Tell me this...when you think about your future, who’s you’re husband?”
“You are,” Mac admitted.
“Do you feel you have a great career?”
“You know I do.”
“Yes, but do you think you do?”
“Yes.”
“Do you feel I meet the standards of a ‘good man’?
“Most of the time, yes.”
“Do you have lots of comfortable shoes?”
“Yes, but I could use more,” Mac teased, realizing what he was trying to do.
“Fine, I’ll buy you a pair for an engagement gift if you’ll marry me.”
“Harm...”
“You were saying yes before, why change it now?”
“Because you are incorrigible,” Mac returned as she found herself leaning closer to him and felt one of his arms, slide behind her back.
“So?”
“Harm!”
“Yes Mac?”
“I don’t want to make the same old mistakes with you that I’ve made with other men in my life. I want to