CLOSE TO HOME

Author: Hollyjp

Synopsis: Harm and Mac during season 10 are still trying to find their way to one another.

Disclaimer: JAG is the property of Bellisario Productions, CBS, and Paramount. I have borrowed their characters for entertainment purposes only. No monetary gain will result from their appearance in my story.

Author’s Notes:

1. After watching the entire Season One on DVD I realized that although I wasn’t a big Tracey Needham fan, there were some things about Meg and Harm as partners that I liked. Her spunk and how she handled Harm as her partner was one thing.

2. Now, for you shippers, remember, I am now and have always been a Harm and Mac shipper. That remains true in this story; however, I got to thinking what it would have been like if Mac and Meg had met and worked together at any point during the nine years it took for Harm and Mac to get on the same page together.

3. Meg’s character had a way of cutting to the chase and getting to the point. She was one of the few that could look Harm in the eye and tell him like she saw it. It wasn’t until the very end of season one in The Prisoner that you have an inking that Meg cares for Harm as anything more then a brother or partner. Even at that you don’t get the idea that either of them would act on it until Skeleton Crew when we see her reach out to touch him - maybe with the intent of something more sexual - or maybe just comfort as a friend.

4. Anyway, I started jotting down things Meg said in season one to help get her voice, which I’ve always struggled with when I’ve tried to write her into a story. Many of her lines I envisioned being said in different circumstances.

5. For those of you that follow the HBX challenge each month, you might want to think of this along those lines. I’m going to have Meg reuse lines, but in different ways! I also plan to keep some of the dialogue as it was in the show, but some I will need to change to fit what I did with the story. I think you’ll know it when you see it. Oh and you’ll see the August 2006 HBX challenge lines show up in a later chapter.

6. Naming this story was interesting. I started out with “Calling Austin” but then my focus wasn’t on calling Meg Austin at all. So then I tried several other titles. While reading Gibson’s story, “The Walls of Emerald City,” she used the line, “It hit a little too close to home.” BINGO! That’s it...not only did it fit most of my story, it was a delightful play on HAE’s new show, “Close to Home.” It made me think of the line Mac says in the season ten opener to Clayton Webb, about not wanting to be a ‘desperate house wife.’ Now I don’t know if that was Gibson’s intention when she used the line in her story, if it was, my hats off too you and I give you credit here for coming up with it first. But if not, then its just the kind of title I love to use...one that had hidden or underlying meanings.

7. Now again, I think I’ll be writing a story that shippers and non-shippers can enjoy...but as always, the ‘ship will prevail!” After all, this is a JAG fanfic written by Hollyjp!

CLOSE TO HOME

by Hollyjp

PART 1

“Colonel Mackenzie!” A dark haired Petty Officer First Class hurriedly moved through the corridors at JAG Headquarters in Falls Church, Virginia calling to the Marine Lt. Colonel just getting on the elevator at the end of a long trying day in court.

“Yes, Petty Officer Coates?” came the tired response.

Despite prevailing for her client, the case had been exhausting. That wasn’t unusual when she faced Commander Rabb in court, but their protege Lt. Commander Bud Roberts had turned out to be as difficult. The difference between the two situations was the adrenaline that pumped through her veins when she faced Rabb wasn’t there when she faced anyone else in court, hence her exhausted state.

“Sorry, Ma’am but General Creswell wants you in his office ASAP.”

Stepping out of the elevator once again she nodded to the once troubled wild child that had become a dedicated petty officer, another protege of Commander Rabb. In both cases she knew she had played a major role, but still she thought of them both as being Rabb’s projects.

“Lt. Colonel Sarah Mackenzie reporting as ordered, sir.”

“At ease Colonel...have a seat please. I know you’ve just completed a challenging case but I don’t have a lot of choice with Commander Rabb having to be out so much with his foster daughter.”

“I understand General. What do you need me to do?”

“I need you to catch a flight to Fort Worth Texas. From there you’ll meet up with your new temporary partner and continue on to the Puget Sound Naval Shipyard in Bremerton, Washington. Together you’ll investigate and file your report to me. You will then return to JAG Headquarters together. Any questions?”

“Yes sir...three.”

“Go ahead Colonel Mackenzie.”

“First sir, can you tell me what this case is in regards to?”

“A female weapons expert is being accused of attempting to sabotage a submarine with a faulty software program. You have knowledge of submarines, weapons, and strategic planning as well as the law. You partner knows weapons, computers and the law. Together I think you’ll be able to handle this quickly and get back here. Next question.”

“Yes sir...As you’ve already explained why I’m being tagged for this, there’s just one more thing...who is my new partner?”

“A Commander Meg Austin. She apparently worked here at JAG some time ago for about a year before moving on. Did you know her?”

“No sir...she was Commander Rabb’s former partner though.”

“Good. The two of you should be able to compare notes or commiserate over the trials of working with the Commander.” Creswell shot her his smirk that passed for a grin when he was pleased with himself.

“Yes sir.”

“If there is nothing else Colonel, I expect you to be in the air to Fort Worth within the hour. Coates has your travel vouchers ready. Dismissed.”

“Aye, Aye sir!” Mac spun on her heel and exited the General’s office, her heart pounding. From nerves, excitement or stress she couldn’t say.

“Here you go Ma’am.”

“Thanks Coates. Look, I know Harm’s pushing us all away right now, but would you check on him and let him know where I’m heading...tell him I’ll call sometime tomorrow.”

“No problem Colonel.”

“Thanks Jennifer.”

Two hours later

COD to Fort Worth

“I can’t believe I’m going to meet Harm’s former partner,” Mac thought as she rested her head on the headrest as she flew through the now darkening late March sky.

She wondered if she would hit it off with Meg Austin. Harm never said much about her which made Mac curious; however, she had noticed that Harm did speak well of her when he did refer to her. She wondered if Meg knew who she was.

Same Time

Forth Worth Air Station

Meg Austin wore her peanut butter uniform for travel as she waited in her office to meet with her former partner’s partner. Meg and Harm had remained friends over the years. They had only seen each other twice in all that time. Their communications had been limited mostly to Christmas and birthday cards, other then the two length letters Meg had received from Harm. One had come after he had found his father. The second had come just a few months ago. Their topic of conversation seemed to come back to Mac each time.

Now, as Meg waited to meet Sarah Mackenzie for the first time, she wondered if the green-eyed monster would appear and give her away or make it impossible for Mac and Meg to work together. This was a test to determine if her feelings for the man in her life were real or an illusion. Going TAD to JAG Headquarters would be a test in more ways then one.

Meg gathered the information together that had just come in from Bremerton, Washington, made a copy for Colonel Mackenzie, packed her briefcase and laptop and headed to the hangar.

The COD would land and take on fuel and some supplies before heading to northwestern United States. She was to board while it was there for a brief stop. She was running late. She couldn’t miss this flight or delay it.

On the COD

Forth Worth, Texas

Mac looked up as the tall blonde female officer with her no sense stride approached her where she stood, stretching her legs.

“Colonel Mackenzie.” Meg noticed immediately the physical resemblance between Sarah Mackenzie and Diane Schonke. Harm had told her about it of course, but seeing it first hand gave her a chill.

“Commander Austin.” This stunning woman would certainly turn heads. She wondered how far Harm’s head had been turned by her.

They shook hands, each sizing the other up. “Please call me Meg. I feel like I should know you.”

“Don’t count on it, Commander, especially if you’re basing it on anything your former partner said about me.”

“Yes Ma’am.”

“Please, call me Mac. I’m sorry I jumped down your throat. It’s just...”

“You don’t have a clue what I’m like nor what Harm said about you. Your reaction is understandable given the circumstances...Mac.”

By the time the COD was in the air, the two women had set aside their personal issues and were deeply involved in reviewing their case. Mac was surprised to discover that she had Meg spoke the same language, with only one major difference. Meg was direct and to the point, but a cock-eyed optimism the likes of which Mac had never seen.

“Are you always this perky?” Mac finally asked her.

“Most of the time. My old partner taught me that when you weren’t sure, act as if you were and before you knew it, you would scare away the doubts allowing you to act on your instincts.”

“Harmon Rabb Junior said that to you?”

“Yes. He hasn’t told you that?”

“No...I find him to be a little lacking in the communications department most of the time...at least where words are concerned. His actions tend to speak louder then his words - unless he’s in court.”

“I never thought he was at a lost for words...as a matter of fact I’ve heard him referred to as a prolific writer even.”

“Oh he can talk about lots of things; just not the things that really matter. As for being a writer - are you sure we’re talking about the same man?”

“Six foot four, fighter jock, cocky as hell?”

“Sounds like the same one,” Mac laughed finding she enjoyed Meg Austin’s quick wit. “But I don’t think I’ve ever seen him pick up a pen to write unless it was a report or a list.”

“I can understand why that might have changed,” Meg thought drifting off to a time nine years ago when she had seen her partner cuffed and driven away to jail.

Meg had been so afraid of her growing feelings for him at the time and so afraid that her admission in China to Commander Krennick would be used against her. Not wanting to relive that nightmare at the moment, she snapped her attention back to Sarah Mackenzie, Mac, Harm’s partner? Friend? Lover? No...not lover.

Harm wouldn’t have been as frustrated about things the last time they spoke it they were lovers. Suddenly another piece of the puzzle that was Harmon Rabb Junior fell into place for Meg Austin.

“Meg, are you okay?” Mac asked as she saw her temporary partner’s mind drift to something else and then snap back to the moment.

“I’m fine. What were you saying?”

“Why do you think Harm has such an aversion to written communication?”

“Because he...cared about someone once, a long time ago and he use to write to her all the time. She saved his letters. Those same letters were used to try and prove that he had motive to kill two people.”

“Diane...”

“He told you about Diane I take it.”

“Let’s just say I wormed it out of him...thankfully.”

“Ever see a picture of her?”

“Yes.”

“Then you know you two look like the same person.”

“Yes...but Harm and Bud have both said we had very different personalities.”

“Well, that I couldn’t attest to...I never met her in person...but I was there when Harm found out she had been murdered...and saw the body without being prepared that it was her. He literally heard her name as the body bag was opened. He was shocked as I’m sure you can imagine.”

“Yes...I was with Harm when there was finally closure on Diane’s case...Bud Roberts was there too. He filled me in on some things.”

“Ensign Roberts...I wondered what he’s doing these days.”

“He’s Lt. Commander Roberts now. He’s married, four children, a lawyer, and one of Harm and my best friends.”

“Good for Bud. Harm always said he thought he had the makings of a good lawyer and officer. It’s funny but I’ve never thought to ask about him.”

“Harm was right.” Mac exchanged a knowing smile with Meg. She thought about what it must have been like watching Harm and Meg together. He didn’t mention her that often but when he did it was usually to compare her to Mac...and make Mac mad. The question forming in Mac’s mind popped out of her mouth before she had totally formulated it in her brain - a very unlike Mac thing to do she admitted later.

“Did Harm ever compare you to anyone to make you mad with the idea of pushing you to do more?”

“Affirmative! Where did he learn to do that?”

“I don’t know. Who did he compare you to?”

“Usually himself or men in general.”

“Oh I didn’t get that too often...once I did,” admitted Mac thinking of the time she had been shot when they came across the poachers after they had mechanical problems with his plane. “Sometimes he would say things like, Meg had trouble with this...and when I would say I’m not Meg he’d just say, ‘We’ll see’ in that knowing way of his.”

“I take it you had to go on a submarine then.” At Mac’s nod she asked, “How did you make out?”

“Not my favorite thing, but I did okay...better then when I went up in a ‘Tomcat’ with him.”

“That’s funny...I hated the subs, but handled the sonic speeds fine. How do you handle him when he gets all arrogant and cocky...well more then usual?”

“I tend to act like my old drill Sargent I guess. I made sure he knew I could take him down and would do it if needed. What about you?”

“I had a habit of telling him to shut up...or asking him if he was showing off. Someone once referred to me as a ‘bold woman.’ I think it was because I grew up around cowboys. They’re not much different then fighter pilots. I can remember my mother getting in Dad’s face. It worked for her so I guess I used her techniques on Harm. Being a junior officer I sometimes had to apologize after, but that was one of the things I liked about Harm. I could speak my mind with him and he never held it against me.”

“I was told you requested a transfer. May I ask why?”

“Yes Ma’am. You can ask all the questions you want, but I’m under no obligation to give you an answer.”

“No, you’re not. I’m sorry if I offended you Meg. That was not my intention.”

“I understand that Ma’am. May I ask why you want to know?”

“I don’t know how much Harm has told you, Meg, about our relationship...”

“A little. I know that he’s waiting for you to decide if you want one with him or not.”

“When did you last talk to him?”

“Last October... I called to wish him a Happy Birthday...he sounded anything but happy. Look, I know that you two have danced around a relationship for years. He’s never told me any details, but there are signs. I read those sign pretty well most of the time.”

“I wish I could. Every time I think I’m reading him right, it blows up in my face and I’m shown just how wrong I am.” Mac had flashes in her head of the ferry in Sydney, standing in the rain watching him hold Renee, asking him what he’d be willing to give up for him and not getting an answer, and finding one woman after another at Harm’s apartment when she would stop by in the evening.

“Let me ask you this? Does he treat you more like a sister or flirt outrageously with you?”

“Well, when we first met, he flirted like crazy...then at some point I felt that I was like his sister...the girl next door. I use to cringe when we would have to go to formal affairs and we’d dance...as partners...I use to tell him he was dancing with me as if I was his sister...he use to deny it...but I know how it felt.”

“He really does love you...if I had any doubt before I don’t now.”

“Why would you say that?”

“Look, you asked why I asked for a transfer. I’ll tell you so you can understand my reasoning. Harm had a partner before I came along. Did you know that?”

“Yes...Lt. Commander Kate Pike.”

“Well she was only a Lt. (Jg) like me when they worked together...Harm was a Lieutenant. She got nabbed by State to work with them and I was her replacement. Anyway, after six months she ended up in Okinawa and we worked a couple of cases together while she was there. Harm would flirt like crazy with both of us. I knew from something that Kate had said that she and Harm had been together at least once. I also knew that Kate had moved on.”

“I know from my own experience with Kate that she wasn’t good at keeping her mouth shut.”

“True, but she wasn’t a malicious gossip. I think sometimes she just didn’t know how to handle real emotions. Keeping it light, having fun, being daring was more her style. Anyway, we also worked with Commander Allison Krennick.”

“I’ve heard that name a few times...and not in a good way.”

“Then you know she sexually harassed Harm.”

“Yes...Bud told me. Harm confirmed it later on.”

“Before she got shipped off to Hawaii, we worked a murder case together.”

“Diane?”

“Yes...it was just a few weeks before that I realized I wanted something more with Harm...l even thought about ways I could seduce him. Kate had gotten away with it...I thought maybe I could too.” Meg watched Mac to see what her reaction was. She nodded seeing that Mac understood what she was saying.

“It never went further then me thinking about it. Harm opened up to me when Diane was killed. He told me that when they had first met at the Academy they weren’t allowed to get involved with one another. He cared about her so much that he would never do anything to jeopardize her career, so he was careful not to act on his feelings. He treated her like a sister. They had a platonic relationship, but he had written to her all the time while she had been deployed and she had saved those letters. In them he had told her that he wanted to see her when she got home, because he thought they had a chance to have something more.”

“They were suppose to go to her parents cabin in Maine for the week and talk about where they wanted their relationship to go. I did know there were a lot of letters...but I thought most of them were ones she wrote to him.”

“You didn’t read them then?”

“No...did you?”

“Some of them. I had to in order to find proof that their relationship was platonic as he had claimed. It was hard, when he talked about wanting to hold her and see if their kisses would set him afire like they did in his dreams.”

“Oh God!” Mac thought about the kiss he had given her that night on the docks in Norfolk. It explained so much.

“What?”

“Nothing...please keep going.”

“Anyway I started to realize that there was a pattern. When Harm’s feeling are the most deeply involved, he treats the woman with the highest level of respect...like he would his mother or sister. When his feelings aren’t involved, he is the outrageous flirt...the cocky aviator.”

“You’re saying that the more platonic Harm treats a woman, the more non-platonic his feelings for her really are?”

“Nothing’s too crazy when you’re trying to figure him out, Ma’am. You see, Commander Rabb is kind of old fashion.”

“He’s a hypocrite, if he thinks he can bed women on a whim, but hold out for the pure and innocent for marriage! I shot and killed a man with screwed up morals like that!” Mac seethed as she let Meg’s words sink in. “Sorry I shouldn’t have said that...forget you heard it.”

“It’s not like that Ma’am. He doesn’t expect woman to be pure...its more just how he treats women when he does love them. That’s why I asked for a transfer. I knew that we would never be more then friends. We had fun together. We flirted with each other. If I had stayed, we may have taken it further. I didn’t want to risk my career over a relationship that wouldn’t fly...so I asked for the transfer.”

“I think I’m beginning to follow you Meg. Do you still think you love him?”

“No...I found someone to love and he loves me...and we both put our careers first for now, although we are thinking about getting married and starting a family now I’m stationed in Fort Worth and my Mom is around to help out.”

“Congratulations, then.”

“Thank you, but its too soon for that. I haven’t decided to make the commitment yet...now about Harm.”

“What about Harm?”

“What’s he up to these days?”

“He’s spending his time at Mattie’s bedside hoping she’ll survive and that if she does she’ll be able to live a quality life.”

“What happened?”

“You didn’t know I take it.”

“I knew about Mattie...but not that she was in the hospital.”

“She was in an aircraft accident. As they were landing, another pilot was taxiing and they collided. Mattie wasn’t flying - her instructor was at the controls. He was killed. They said it was a miracle that Mattie lived.”

“How’s Harm handling things?”

“He’s there every second he can spare. He won’t let anyone go with him...and frankly he’s leaving the rest of us so busy we don’t have time to sit with him.”

“That’s why you needed me TAD.”

“Does it screw up your plans?”

“No...as a matter of fact, this is a good thing. I’ll be honest. I was curious about you. So far, I like what I see and think we’ll work well together.”

“Thank you. Listen, I need to warn you, we’ve got this new guy at headquarters that drives me crazy. He’s worse then Harm ever was. The guy’s morals, values, integrity - non-existent from what I can see. I think I could enjoy watching you work with him.”

“Name?”

“Lt. Gregory Vukovich - wants to be called Vic. He’s a weasel and a womanizer.”

“Sometimes I like being senior officer,” Meg grinned at Mac. “This sounds like it will be entertaining at the very least.”

For the rest of the trip they chatted about their duty assignments and played a version of six degrees of separation as they tried to compare mutual acquaintances besides Bud and Harm.

PART 2

1140 Local

Bremerton, Washington

“Mac, looked at this.”

Mac leaned over Meg’s shoulder and stared at the screen displaying the information Meg had managed to restore from the floppy they had found in the trash.

“You did it. That’s the smoking gun we needed. Excellent work Commander Austin.”

“Thank you Colonel Mackenzie.” Meg stood up a stretched smiling at her temporary partner. She could imagine Harm and Mac working together. They were both thorough and neither left a stone unturned. Meg respected their style.

“Why don’t you take a break?”

“We’ve got to finish the report to General Creswell.”

“Meg, you didn’t sleep last night. Rest while I draft the report. I’ll wake you up and if it looks good to you we’ll send it and head out of here.”

“Alright...thanks Mac.”

“No problem.”

Mac watched Meg leave the room they had been given for an office while conducting their investigation. They had decided on the plane to go right to the base when they arrived and start their investigation catching everyone by surprise. It had lead to dividends all the way around. People were rushing to cover their tracks and someone tossed out a floppy disk thinking that no one would bother to try to get information off the damaged item.

They hadn’t counted on Meg and Mac. Meg had taken the disk and by 0400 she had been at the computer working. Mac had gone to the rest on the cot in the next room. Three hours later she had brought in food for both of them and started following some of the other leads they had. Meg still worked on that computer disk knowing she had something, but not sure what is was until she pulled up that final table. Somehow it had sustained little damage to a chart that listed those involved, their assignments, and specialties.

Mac finished the report and the accompanying forms required just as Meg returned.

“Great timing. See what you think.”

Meg read Mac’s report noticing that she was thorough and to the point at the same time. It was almost like reading her own reports. Meg nodded.

“Send it.”

“Done. Now, let’s call Creswell.” Mac grabbed the phone on her desk, punched in the familiar number and was momentarily startled when General Creswell himself answered.

“General Creswell?”

“Colonel Mackenzie.”

“We’ve sent out report. You should have it in your mailbox as we speak.

“Already?”

“Yes sir. We caught them by surprise and have what we need. Just wanted to alert you.”

“Good. Look, I need you and Austin to get back here. Get a commercial flight if necessary. I’ll have NCIS pick them up and file charges.”

“Yes sir.”

“Good job. See you 0800 tomorrow.”

“Aye, aye sir.”

Meg in the meantime called to check on military transport. There were two seats available on a flight out of here at 1800 that day.

Mac listened then picked up the phone to call for a commercial flight. After a few minutes of trying different things she booked two seats and turned with a flourish to Meg Austin.

“Let’s go. I got us a flight out of Bremerton Airport to Salt Lake City. From there we connect with our flight to Washington DC. If we make our connections we’ll be at Dulles by the time we would have left here.”

1950 Local

Washington DC

Mac opened her car so she and Meg could stow their bags. She grabbed her cell phone and called Harm’s number first, planning to let him know they were back. He answered on the first ring.

“Rabb.”

“It’s Mac...how’s Mattie?”

“She woke up.”

“And?” She knew from his voice that he wasn’t encouraged. She hoped that he would open up to her a little.

“Mac...I just got home. Where are you?”

So much for him opening up to her. “I’m with my new temporary partner between Dulles and you. Can we stop for a few minutes?”

“Mac, I’m not really up to socializing.”

“Harm, I haven’t seen you in weeks. Have you eaten?”

“Not hungry.”

“When did you last eat?”

“Don’t know.”

“Look, we won’t stay long, but I need to see for myself that you’re okay. Please humor me.”

“Alright...just don’t expect much.”

“I don’t...see you in twenty.”

“You’re going to surprise him with me?”

“Do you mind?”

“Not at all. He still eat anchovies on his pizza?”

“Sometimes...usually he orders veggie.”

“I’ll call the pizza place and put in an order. You know the number?”

“Speed Dial number six,” Mac grinned.

“Loaded?”

“Ask for the works.”

“Got it.”

Harm’s Apartment

North of Union Station

Harm paced back and forth across the loft waiting for Mac and the mystery guest to arrive. He hadn’t slept much in the past few weeks due to Mac and Mattie. Mac because he wanted and needed her in his life so much it scared him and she was still resisting him. Mattie because of the accident and her slow recovery. She had been awake for two days now. But she had little or no ability to use her arms and legs.

Just thinking of Mattie laying in that hospital alone, scared, unable to move, not knowing what was going to happen to her, where her father was - it made Harm angry. He needed to process this with someone, but he didn’t want to unload on Mac. She was already picking up slack for him so he could have time off to spend with Mattie.

Still, he wasn’t in the mood to entertain company. At the same time it wasn’t that often that Mac called and asked to come over. Maybe it was a sign she was moving closer to him. He had already pushed her away once when she came to the hospital to see him last week. He needed to make up for that too. So he sucked it up, showered, shaved and dressed in clean jeans and a t-shirt before Mac and her guest arrived.

Her new temporary partner...images of Vukovich came to mind. He hoped to hell that she wasn’t saddled with another jerk like that one. As Chief of Staff, she had to assign cases to Vukovich, but she didn’t have to work with him on a regular basis. Still, Harm wondered who was about to arrive in his home. He was too tired and run down for entertaining, but for Mac he would make the effort.

Same Time

Hall Outside Harm’s Loft

“You ready for this?” At Meg’s nod, Mac knocked on the door. She stepped back so that when Harm opened his door he would see Meg and not her. She would however be able to see him and his reaction.

“...Meg...?”

“Surprise!” Meg greeted standing in the doorway, smiling with her arms up waiting for him to accept her hug.

Mac watched Harm shift gears at the sight of his former partner as he processed what was before him.

“Your Mac’s partner?”

“She is. Are you leaving us out here? ‘Cause if you are I’m not leaving you your pizza.”

“I’m sorry. Come in...” He accepted Meg’s hug then as his eyes met Mac’s. “Its good to see you.”

He turned to take the pizza from Mac which prevented him from hugging her. He had to stop himself from kissing her cheek as he leaned close to her. Instead he murmured, “I’ve missed you.”

“Nice place you’ve got here Harm. I knew you’d moved from 8^th Street...now I can see why...this looks like a real bachelor’s pad.”

“Harm did most of the work on this place himself.” Mac had fond memories of watching him work on it when they first met...picnics while sitting on his bed when she brought him food as a peace offering. It had been fun to watch his progress...and him. That had been when she had first started to fall for her partner. Shaking herself out of her memories, she joined Meg and Harm at the table...one sitting on each side of him at his place at the head of the table.

“So where does Mattie sleep when she’s with you?” Meg asked.

“Down the hall with Jennifer Coates. You been back to JAG yet?”

“Zero eight hundred tomorrow. Changed much?”

“In some ways....yeah. You can be gone from that place just a few weeks and feel like its some place new when you return a month later.”

“Turn over rate that high?” Meg asked.

“At times. Although Harm has been there over ten years; Bud and I’ve been there nine; Harriet had eight years.”

“You two should look for new assignments. You’re need to build your resume.”

“We have Meg. We’ve got stuff in our files that we hardly have the clearance to read. You on the other hand, are like a leap frog hopping all over the globe.”

“After this TAD, I plan to be at Fort Worth for as long as I can. I’m thinking I’m get out at the twenty year mark. You’ve been in twenty now, haven’t you Harm?”

“Almost. I think I’m going to try to hit thirty years in.”

“I’m with you Meg. I think I prefer to exit at twenty...at least right now that’s what I’m hoping for. We’ll see what happens between now and then.”

“Are you serious Mac?”

“Yes...Harm, did you think I was making this a lifetime career?”

“I guess I did. Seems like every time I think I’ve got this thing figured out, the perimeters change.” Harm shook his head while Mac and Meg exchanged glances at his confusion.

They talked while they ate the pizza. Harm updated them on Mattie and explained that he had been ordered to return to JAG now that she was awake, although the General had agreed to shorten his workday.

“Meg, thanks for pitching in. Where are you staying?”

“Not sure yet.”

“Look, I’m sure Mattie and Jen wouldn’t mind you bunking at their place. Better then a hotel room.”

“You sure?”

“Let me call Jen and asked.”

While Harm called her Mac and Meg talked quietly.

“Harm looks exhausted.”

“He does. I don’t like the idea of him driving back and forth between here and Blacksburg everyday, but I know that’s what he’s going to try to do.”

“Blacksburg...isn’t that at least two hours away?”

“Yeah. Mattie lives there with her Dad now...and that’s where she’s in the hospital.”

“Maybe we can take turns going with him and helping with the driving.”

“Try if you want Meg. He shut me out.”

“Well that’s stupid.”

“Thank you Meg, I think so too.”

“What do you think, Mac?” Harm asked as he rejoined them.

“Nothing you want to hear. What did Jennifer say?”

“She’s coming over to issue the invitation herself.” The knock on the door followed Harm’s statement. “Come in Jennifer.”

“Good evening sir...Ma’am.”

“At ease Jennifer. This is Commander Meg Austin, my former partner. Meg, Petty Officer First Class Jennifer Coates.”

“Nice to meet you Ma’am. You’re welcome to use the spare room in my apartment while you’re here.”

“Thank you Jennifer.”

“Would you like to see it Ma’am before you decide?”

“That would be nice. Let’s check it out shall we?”

Meg followed Jennifer next door. When the door shut behind her, Harm turned to Mac.

“What do you think of Meg so far?”

“She’s great...witty, smart, easy to work with, and she doesn’t hesitate to put people in their place if they need it. She should have been a Marine.” Mac smiled at Harm so he would know she was teasing.

“So what have you two been talking about?”

“You worried?”

“Maybe a little.”

“Wow...I didn’t expect that. What worries you?”

“That the two of you will gang up on me over something. Holding my own with either of you has always been a challenge...combined forces may be too much.”

“You are admitting to a weakness?”

“Maaac....”

“Sorry...couldn’t resist...how are you really Harm?” Mac studied him. He looked tired, stressed, worried, but relaxed at the moment.

“I’m okay. I’m worried about Mattie...Tom’s disappeared.”

“How long?”

“Three days now. He doesn’t even know she’s awake.”

“On a binge...too much to handle too soon.”

“What about Mattie?”

“I told her that he was getting the house ready for her...she reminded me it’s the first time I’ve lied to her. Felt like scum.”

Mac had moved closer to him as they had worked around in the kitchen taking care of the leftovers and dishes. She wanted to rub his back...reach out to him somehow. Not wanting to upset him, or chance a rebuke, she hesitated until he turned his tortured eyes too her and she could see his need for her to comfort him in his eyes.

Mac opened her arms and he stepped into them. Despite the differences in their height, he buried his face in her neck and let the tears that had been threatening since her visit to the hospital fall.

Harm felt her arms surround him and her hands moving up and down his back, soothing and comforting him unlike anyone else he had ever known. His own arms were around her waist, locked above the swell of her six. He backed up and sat on one of the island stools, while Mac stepped between his legs to stay close. They had held each other and shared tears after Bud’s accident and before that, when baby Sarah had died minutes after her birth.

Before that, they had hugged each other when he had needed to live her in the desert with the Bedouin while he returned the black jet to the carrier and again when she joined them on the carrier, safely returned to him.

This is how he should have been there to comfort her when ‘Bug-me’ left her and returned to Australia. Its how he wanted to hold her when he found her in Paraguay and brought her home. It’s how he wanted to hold her for the rest of their lives, if she would only decide she was ready.

Meg let herself into Harm apartment and her face lit up at the sight that greeted her. Harm and Mac holding each other...finding comfort. Meg would have excused herself and left if they had been kissing. Instead she watched them hold each other and thought about her own reaction to seeing them like this.

Her smile grew as she realized that the green-eyed monster had not appeared watching these two people embrace. Meg considered that a good sign that she was over her crush on Harm. She may hero worship him at times; and she would never find him anything but sexy; however, she also knew that she would count him as a friend for life. Finally she cleared her throat.

“Sorry to intrude. I’m going to bunk at Jen’s. It sounds like Creswell will keep me busy enough that I won’t be hanging out that much anyway.”

“When there’s time to hang out, you can hang over here like Jen does.”

“Thanks Harm. You okay?”

Mac slowly backed away from Harm putting space between them once again.

“I’ll be fine now...things had built up and its gotten harder over the years to deal with those emotions. Good friends always help.” He smiled at Mac, brushing her arm with his hand.

“Harm, its getting late. I need to get home and get some sleep.”

“I’ll walk you out.”

“Meg, I’ll see you at the office in the morning.”

“Yes Ma’am. Thanks for bringing me here tonight, Mac.”

“No problem.”

“Meg, I’ll be right back.”

“Take your time.”

Harm waited until Mac had unlocked her car door, before stopping her as she started to get into her car.

“Mac, I’m glad you brought Meg over tonight. It will be nice to catch up on the news with her in person for a change.”

“I’m sure it will.”

“Mac, are you upset?”

“What do I have to be upset about?”

“You tell me?”

“Fine...try long legged blonde for starters. I’m going home.” Mac slipped away from him, seated herself behind the wheel, closed the door and started the engine as if it was all one movement. Harm stepped back in time not to lose a toe when she took off, her tires squealing.

PART 3

2315 Local

North of Union Station

Harm watched Mac drive away, obviously upset. He wasn’t sure what had happened. They had connected tonight as they held each other and gave in to all the emotions they had bottled up. They had laughed with Meg as they ate pizza before they had that moment alone. Then things had changed. What had she said in explanation - long legged blonde.

“She’s jealous of my friendship with Meg,” he announced before looking around to see if anyone had heard him.

Same Time

Harm’s Loft

Meg heard the tired squealing and looked out the window of Harm’s apartment. He stood still in the dark watching the taillights of the red Corvette disappear around the corner. Harm had done or said something to upset Mac.

“Time to smarten that man up before he blows it permanently,” Meg chuckled to herself.

By the time Harm returned Meg was ready for him. As he opened the door she started in.

“Are you always a jerk or are you showing off on my behalf?”

“What?”

“You heard me. Mac’s angry, right?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know.”

“I think you do. Think about it Harm. You’re a smart man...put the clues together.”

“All she said was ‘think long legs and blonde.’ She’s jealous of our friendship.”

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why would she be jealous of two people being friends?”

“Meg...”

“Harm...I’m not letting you off the hook. I have nothing at stake here. I know our friendship will last. I knew you before you built up all those walls. You let me in and I know things about you that Mac’s never had a chance to learn.”

“Like what?”

Meg knew Harm wasn’t happy about this little impromptu sessions, but she also knew he was desperate enough to hear her out. “Like you use to be willing and able to put your thoughts into words - until it was used against you. Like you have a habit of treating the people you care about the most as if they were a relative...those you don’t have a connection with are fair game for flirting or more. You send mixed messages Harm.”

Meg waited for him to deny it or argue his case in opposition. He wasn’t looking at her, but she knew he was thinking about what she said. She watched his fists clenched at his sides and then still as he slowly relaxed them.

“Have you told her how you feel Harm?”

“Yes...no...she knows.”

“If I was a betting woman, I’d say she isn’t sure. Those mixed messages you keep sending her way have her baffled.” Meg studied him a little more. “You can’t even say the words can you?”

“I can.”

“To her?”

“I’m working on it.”

“Harm, I’m going to say one more thing tonight before I go get some sleep. I had a crush on you years ago and it kept me from being sure I could commit to someone else. After watching you and Mac when neither of you knew I was here, I know that the two of you are meant to be together and I’m meant for someone else. I also know that if you and Mac can get it together, I can be friends to both of you.”

“Who’s the guy?”

“I knew you’d have to know...but I’m not tellin’ until you convince Mac I’m not a threat to your relationship. Stop pretending that you don’t love her. Help her to trust you. Take away her doubts. Sleep on it. Oh, can I catch ride with you to HQ tomorrow?”

“I can go one better. Silver Lexus SUV parked out front...here’s the keys. I’ll be using my Corvette.”

“The one you and Commander Turner rebuilt.”

“That would be the one.”

“Thanks if you’re sure?”

“It’ll be better if we don’t arrive together.”

“Good start. See you at JAG.”

0745 Local

JAG Headquarters

“Morning Ma’am. General Creswell said for you to join him as soon as you can. He’d like to speak with you before Commander Austin joins you.”

“Very well Coates. The Commanders riding together this morning?” Mac asked, hoping she didn’t sound as jealous as she felt.

“No Ma’am. Commander Austin will be using one of Commander Rabb’s vehicles...and he’s already in his office.”

“Tell the general I’m on my way, petty officer.” Mac shook her head not sure what to think of this turn of events. Picking up her files and notepad, she made her way to the general’s office, waving to Harm on her way by his open door.

“Good morning Colonel. Come in, close the door and have a seat.”

“Yes sir.” Mac did as instructed and waited for the General to continue.

“I’ve been giving some thought to how we can give Rabb the time he needs with his daughter, and still keep JAG moving. I brought in some new blood, but you seemed to think they were creating more work for everyone. I’ve asked Commander Austin to join us for the next three months to help out. She has a reputation for being able to whip folks in to shape. What’s your take so far?”

“I haven’t spent that much time with her, but she’ll stand up to anyone. Claims she learned from her mother when she handled cowboys on the ranch.”

“So you’re impressed?”

“Yes sir.”

“Good. I’d like you to assign the lieutenants to her and give her free rein. If they can’t cut it with her, I’ll move them out. Also, feel free to have her share the load with Rabb or yourself. If you do that, it will serve to get Turner off my back.”

“Yes sir.”

<Knock-knock>

“Enter!”

“Commander Austin reported for duty as ordered, sir.”

“At ease. Have a seat Commander. How does it feel to be back at Headquarters?”

“Just fine sir.”

Meg and Mac shared the results of their investigation with General Creswell who decided to have Vukovich prosecute while Roberts defended. He excused Mac and Meg to discuss Meg’s supervisory assignment on their own.

As they walked by Harm’s office, they peaked in and found him sound asleep at his desk. Mac looked at Meg, “Want to have some fun with him?”

“Not right now. I’m off to have some fun supervising this no-it-all, Vukovich...Mac, go easy on him.”

“I will.” She watched Meg move along before entering Harm’s office and closing the door. It clicked shut startling Harm awake. “Sorry...I really didn’t intend to wake you just yet.”

“I’m glad you did.”

“Harm you can’t keep going on like this. What cases do you have that I can reassign?”

“To who?”

“Meg, myself, one of the lieutenants.”

“I can handle it.”

“Harm, you don’t have to prove yourself to anyone. Let us help while Creswell is willing.”

“Mac I don’t want to dump my responsibilities on you...or anyone.”

“Is this payback for when I’ve pushed you away?”

“No...its not...at all.”

“Prove it to me then...give me some of your cases that I can reassign.”

“Mmmaaaaccccc...”

“Stop it Harm. You tell me I can lean on you but you won’t lean on me. Then you wonder why I don’t think we can make it work at times.”

“This isn’t about me leaning on you, Mac, its about whether you can trust me enough to give me a chance to make things work. I know you care about me and I know you know I care about you. I’ve told you I want to be a part of your life. All I need is a word from you...but you can’t give it, because you don’t trust me enough after all this time.”

“I trust you Harm...”

“You trust me to let you down and to hurt you like others have done...like I’ve done in the past. You don’t trust me when I tell you that I’ve other women offer themselves to me and I’ve turned them away. All I have to offer is friendliness. I’m older...I know what I want. All I’m asking for is a chance.”

“I know Harm...I know.” Mac quietly left Harm’s office without looking back.

Harm gritted his teeth and slammed his fist into his hand as he watched Mac exit his office. He knew he didn’t always handle things as well as he could, but he was trying to gain Mac’s trust. He listened to what other women were telling him and trying to apply it. But when it came to Mac, it never seemed to work the way he thought it would.

Trying to focus on his work, he began to review the cases he had to see if there were any he could turn over for reassignment. Mac was right about him not doing justice to his clients when he was on overload. Setting aside five of the twelve cases he currently had open on his desk made him feel like he was at least trying to meet Mac half way.

“Harm?”

“Oh, hi Meg...come on in.”

“Thanks...you mind?” she asked as she indicated she wanted to close the door.

“Go ahead...What’s up?”

“Harm, why won’t you let Mac reassign some of your cases? Don’t you realize that your friends want to share the burden with you?”

“I just culled five from twelve actives I have. I was going to take them to Mac when you came in.”

“Good job. I knew you weren’t too old to learn some new tricks.” Meg flashed him a high wattage smile that rivaled one of his own thousand watt smiles.

“So who you seeing?”

“You aren’t going to pull any fast ones on me mister.”

“I know better then to try.”

“I’ll take these over to Mac for you...and make sure she’s knows I’m just the carrier pigeon.”

“Thanks Meg.”

“Shall we get together over dinner tonight?”

“Can’t tonight. I’ll take a rain check.”

“Big plans?”

“I need to go see Mattie.”