Title: Following Seas (The Sequel to Fair Winds)
Author: Hollyjp
Summary: Captain and Lt. Colonel Rabb are making a life for them and their new family in San Diego.
Disclaimer: JAG is the property of Bellisario Productions, CBS, and Paramount. I have borrowed their characters for entertainment purposes only. No monetary gain will result from their appearance in my story.
Author’s Notes:
This is fan fiction which is designed as an escape from the real world; a place to enjoy our make believe friends; and a place where we can make these wonderful characters we were given live and love for ever.
Anything that doesn’t seem accurate, chalk up to creative license. I do research to a point...but some things have to be a certain way to work for my story...so I make it so.
FOLLOWING SEAS
CHAPTER 1
March 30, 2006
0830 Local
Dr. Melissa Bevins Office
Healthy Beginnings
San Diego, California
“How is everyone doing?” Dr. Bevins asked as Harm and Mac brought Heath and Tori Rabb in for their two week check-up.
“A little more tired then we anticipated, but we’re doing good.” Harm smiled.
“Harm has been a tremendous help as have our mothers.” Mac added with a tired smile.
“But it doesn’t help much when you’re the one that is producing the nutrients for these two. Are you pumping?”
“Yes. Harm always takes at least one shift alone during the night so that we can each get at least four hours of uninterrupted sleep. Last night I actually go six hours.”
“That’s very good. Are you eating enough or are you finding that you are losing weight?”
“I haven’t weighted myself. I’m certainly eating...I mean I’ve always had a big appetite, but there are days I can’t seem to get enough food.”
“Are you tired most of the time?”
“Yes, but with the schedule we have, I’m not surprised I’m tired.” Mac affirmed.
“Is the nursing too much for her?” asked Harm, only concerned about her welfare.
“For now I think Mac needs to make the call on that. What do you think?”
“I think as long as the babies are doing well and Harm keeps cooking me such wonderful meals, I’ll be fine.”
“If it gets too much will you tell us?” pressed Dr. Bevins.
“Yes.” Mac caught the glance Harm gave her and had to chuckle. “I promise Harm.”
“Hang on to this guy, Colonel...he’s a keeper by the sounds.”
“Yeah, he is.” Mac smiled at Harm.
“Well, let’s take a look at Tori first, shall we?” Dr. Bevins suggested.
Mac reached down and picked up her daughter who was awake, unlike her sleeping brother, Heath.
“I’m going to ask you to strip her down including her diaper so we can weigh her, then you can put her diaper back on.” Dr. Bevins instructed. Together Harm and Mac undressed their little girl, who was not at all happy about being disrobed and passed over to the doctor. Her loud angry cry brought a smile from the doctor.
“Good lungs. I take it she’s not crazy about being undressed.”
“Not at all.” Mac smiled.
“Okay Tori, let’s get you weighed and at least start the dressing process again.” Dr. Bevins lay the child on the scales which had a soft cloth liner in it. “Very good. She is certainly thriving Colonel. Ssshhh, Tori...here comes your diaper.” Tori was returned to Mac who quickly re-diapered her daughter and handed her back to the doctor.
“Okay, we’ll be quick...if you could each help hold her, I’ll measure her length. I don’t anticipate much change yet...well a quarter of an inch is great.” They watched Dr. Bevins move Tori’s limbs and look at her eyes that they had noticed seemed to be taking on a distinct green color instead of the newborn blue they had been. Her dark brown hair was wispy but beginning to thicken a little on top.
Tori continued to fuss and express her dislike of the exam. When Dr. Bevins done, she handed her back to Harm. He began dressing his daughter and her cries quieted right away. Mac in the meantime was undressing Heath after waking him up.
She loosened the diaper but did not remove it. Dr. Bevins gave her a questioning look.
“I would suggest for the sake of dryness, you leave his diaper on or at least over him...when the air hits him, he pees,” Mac explained with a chuckle.
“Not unusual. We’ll just leave it here for now,” the doctor smiled as she lifted Heath and put him in the scale. Carefully removing the diaper, she held it over him as she checked the scales. “Excellent progress.” She dropped the diaper over him as she picked him up and put him on the examining table. She removed the diaper then to make sure he had healed properly and there were no signed of infection. Dr. Bevins was pleased to see that he in fact was fine. She just managed to get the diaper over him when the water works went off. They all laughed as they grabbed a dry diaper and put it on.
Dr. Bevins continued her examination and pronounced that both babies were definitely thriving. She instructed them to schedule a follow up appointment in two weeks and left them to finish dressing Heath so they could leave.
Harm and Mac returned to the car and reattached the carriers to the car seat bases. Mac drove as she would drop Harm off at his office while she returned home.
“Mac, are you heading straight home?” Harm asked as they drove the short distance back to his office at the Naval Justice School in San Diego.
“Actually I was going to stop by and see my mother for a few minutes and see if she wanted to come home with me for a little while. I can bring her back when I come back for you later.”
“Look, why don’t I just have Frank bring me home. He wanted to play golf today anyway.” Harm suggested.
“Will you be late?”
“No. He was going to meet me at fourteen hundred to tee off at the Naval Station Golf Course.”
“So you’re only going to play nine?”
“I think so. Do you mind?”
“Not at all. Maybe I’ll just go home and call my mother. I forget she got her driver’s license. Maybe she can drive out to see us instead,” Mac decided. She pulled up and stopped in front of NJS to let Harm out.
“I love you....see you later.”
“Count on it.”
Harm headed to his office. He saw a young brown haired ensign waiting by his office door. “Ensign Price. Are you waiting for me?”
“Yes sir. Could I speak with you in private sir?”
“Of course. Come on in. Petty Officer Hurley, please hold any calls while I’m with Ensign Price,” Harm instructed his office assistant. She certainly was nothing like Coates. There were times he missed having some of the old JAG crew around. She was taking college courses and trying to complete her degree in psychology. Harm was proud of the changes she had made in her life.
“Have a seat Ensign...what can I do for you,” Harm asked as he shut the door to his office.
“Well, it’s been two weeks and I know you had an appointment for the twins. How are they doing?”
“Dr. Bevins announced that they are thriving.”
“Good.”
“Heather, do you need to see the babies?”
“No sir...but I know if they are thriving that I can stop pumping and have the shot so that I not longer produce milk for them.”
“I’m sorry, Heather. We should have let you know. I guess we forgot with all the excitement to keep you posted. You know you can call anytime.”
“Yes sir. I have spoken to Deanna and it sounded like it was going well. I’m seeing the doctor later, so I wanted to check with you first. I’m glad its going well...and I would love to see a picture sir.”
“Heather...are you having any regrets?”
“No sir. It was the right thing to do for everyone. I need to be on my way now.”
“Very well. You’re dismissed...Ensign?”
“Yes?”
“Can I expect you back in the classroom next week?”
“Yes sir.”
“Very good.”
1400 Local
First Tee
Naval Air Station Golf Course
“Harm. Glad you could make it.”
“Thanks Frank. Mac and I talked it over and decided that a little fresh air would do me good. Would you mind giving me a ride home after? Mac brought me in this morning so we could all make the doctor’s appointment for the babies.”
“No problem...can I come in and see them?”
“Of course, Grampa.” Harm smiled. He was glad that their support network was so strong. “Do you think you and Gramma would be able to watch them for a few hours Saturday night?”
“Sure. Business of pleasure?”
“Pleasure...Mac seems very tired and she’s not use to being tied to home the way she is now. I wanted to take her out to dinner and maybe let her get a good nights sleep for a change.”
“Good for you son. You’re mother and I are very proud of you - the way you pitch in and help and the way you do little extras for her.”
“That means a lot. I guess you and Mom raised me to think about the little things a husband should do for his wife...his partner. I wasn’t really good about it when I was single and trying to build relationships, but with Mac, it just comes naturally - feels right.”
“Are you enjoying parenthood?”
“Yeah...dirty diapers, no sleep, no time for us, but I wouldn’t trade it for the world, Frank.” Harm and Frank relaxed and chatted throughout the nine holes of golf. They were loading up Frank’s car when the subject of family cars came up.
“Mac still running her Corvette or are you using it and letting her use the Pacifica?”
“I usually use the Corvette, but its being serviced and we’ve got to wait for a part to come in.”
“We just got a new shipment of vehicles in...is it getting time for two family cars?” Frank asked Harm half kiddingly.
“It could be Frank. What you got in mind?”
“Well you know the new mini-vans are pretty popular,” Frank stated.
“A mom car...”
“What?”
“That’s what I told her a minivan was once...just before she ended up with the Corvette.”
“Talk to her about it Harm. I can get you a great deal on the newest model.”
“You know what Frank. The Corvette is paid for and with my promotion I think we can handle another car payment. Why don’t you see what you can do me and I’ll surprise her.”
“What color do you think she’s like?”
“She’s partial to red...what else looks sporty?”
“We could do one with detailing and really jazz it up.”
“Sounds good. Let me know when its ready.”
1845 Local
Rabb Residence
San Diego
“I think Heath finally caved in. He was wound tonight. Muffin is standing guard on the nursery again,” Harm told her as he slid his arms around Mac’s waist from behind and nuzzled her neck. “Mmmm you smell good.”
“Baby powder or garlic?” Mac asked as she rested against his strong body.
“What?”
“Do you prefer the smell of baby powder or garlic? That’s the only thing I can think of that you could smell?”
“No...you smell like you...warm, sexy...” Harm turned her so he could kiss her lips.
“Harm...”
“You’re not really in the mood are you?”
“I’m sorry...”
“Don’t apologize. Can I at least hold you tonight?” Harm asked as he nuzzled her ear again.
“Of course. Harm I don’t know what’s wrong with me. It’s like I have no interest in sex right now.”
“You’re tired.”
“It’s more then that,” Mac tried to explain.
“What if my mother and Frank watch the twins for us Saturday night so I can take you out to dinner and we can have some time alone. Think that would help?”
“It might...if I’m not too tired.”
“Honey, I’ll be home all day Saturday. You can take a nap and I’ll take care of the twins. I’ll take them over to my folks house and then go get them later...what do you say?”
“I say I’m a very lucky woman to have you for a husband. When did you learn to be so thoughtful?”
“When I grew up?” Harm grinned. “Come on...dinner smells fantastic. Let’s enjoy it while we can.”
Heath and Tori slept through dinner and Mac pumped her milk and then took a bath while Harm cleaned up the kitchen. When he was done, he checked the bottle supply and went to get the new milk she had just pumped and put it up for her. They had quite a bit in the freezer but this was important as Harm tried to give them bottles at night as often as he could. Sometimes Mac would nurse one baby while he bottle fed the other. The next time they would switch.
He went back upstairs to check on Mac to find her wrapped in a towel sitting on the side of the bed and crying.
“Mac, Honey, what’s wrong?” Harm asked as he sat next to her and pulled her against him, letting her head rest in the hollow of his shoulder.
“I’m sorry...You’re so good to me and I can’t even find the energy to make love anymore...and when we do, I’m afraid I’m going to be so sore that I won’t enjoy you touching my breasts anymore and I’ve always loved the way your hands feel on my body...on my breasts...” she hiccoughed as she cried harder.
Harm rubbed her back lightly and just let her cry while he tried to sooth her with words of love.
“Honey it’s okay...we’re okay...your life has really changed-more then mine. When we make love, it had to be right for both of us.”
“I know Harm...but I hate feeling like this...tired...weepy...and yet I love being a mother. I absolutely love taking care of the babies...but I want to feel like a woman too.”
“And you don’t?”
“No...yes...I mean...yes I feel like a motherly woman, but not a sexy turn your husband on with a look kind of woman.”
“Trust me Mac, you turn me on...”
“And I have no interest in doing a thing about it right now! That’s the part I hate. I use to get turned on knowing I was turning you on. Now, its like, I hope he’s tired tonight because I don’t want to tell him no...but I don’t want sex.” Mac hid her face against him and let the tears come again.
“Ssshhhh it’s okay...we’ll get through this. Did you talk to anyone about it?”
“Oh so now you think its in my head? Great!” Mac jumped up and paced still wrapped in her towel.
“That’s not what I meant. Did you talk to the doctor about this?”
“Oh...no not yet. I thought you meant a shrink.”
“I know and that’s not what I was referring to at all.”
“See, I’m jumpy too...and no!”
“What Mac?”
“Look at me...I pumped my breasts just before I took my bath and I’m already leaking.” She gestured to the towels that were showing the tell tale circular wet patterns.
“Honey, how many times a day are you pumping?” Harm asked.
“At least six times during the day.”
“And nursing?”
“I nurse both babies about every three to four hours and I always pump once in between.”
“Oh...I thought you were only pumping in the morning and a couple of times in the evening. Mac, that seems like a lot.”
“I know, but it just keeps coming.”
“I think you should call the doctor.”
“No! He might make me stop nursing.” Mac cried desperately.
“Okay...relax...maybe it will quiet down soon. But Mac, its no wonder you’re tired and sore. Does it hurt to nurse?”
“Sometimes...but usually its okay.”
“Why don’t you get dressed in something comfortable and come curl up and watch a movie with me...maybe something funny?”
“Okay...I’m really sorry about falling apart tonight.”
“It’s good you are talking to me Marine. We’ll get through this.”
CHAPTER 2
1349 Local
Friday
Captain Rabb’s Office
NJS
“Yes Dr. Dillard...thank you for returning my call.”
[What can I do for you?]
“I need some information. I discovered last night that my wife is producing an awful lot of breast milk. She nurses both twins every three to four hours all day and has to pump in between. She pumped last night and within less then two hours, she was leaking. She’s exhausted and sore.” Harm explained tot he doctor.
“We can give her a shot that will reduce her lactating,” suggested Dr. Dillard.
“She’s afraid you’ll make her stop nursing.”
“Not necessarily, but she should be checked out. Can you get her in here today?”
“I’ll see what I can do. I’ll tell my nurse to fit her in whenever she gets here.”
“Thank you.”
Harm hung up the phone and dialed his house. Mac answered on the second ring and he could hear a baby fussing in the background.
“Hey Mac...you sound busy.”
“Not bad...Tori wants her food.”
“Well I won’t keep you...but I wanted you to know that Dr. Dillard wants to see you.”
“Did you call him?”
“Yes I did. I told him that you did not want to stop nursing. He wants you to come in to his office today. He’ll fit you in.”
“Alright. I’ll get my mother to watch the twins. Harm...thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
1650 Local
Dr. Dillard’s Office
Naval Medical Center
“Sorry to keep you waiting, Colonel Mackenzie.”
“That’s alright... Thank you for fitting me in.”
“I understand that you’re plumbing is working over time.”
“If you mean my breast milk, then yes.”
“Slip your top off so I can examine you, please. I’ll be right back.” Dr. Dillard stepped out of the room and Mac removed her shirt and bra and slipped the hospital gown on to cover herself. Dr. Dillard was back immediately. “Let’s see what we’re dealing with.” He carefully slid the gown down her arms until he could see both breasts. “Lay back please...and raise one arm over your head, tucking your hand behind your head...as if you were going to do a breast exam.”
Mac did as she was instructed. He felt her breasts and the pressure of his hands alone, had milk oozing from her nipples. She had always been large breasted and her nipples had always been larger then most, but being full of milk, and breast feeding and pumping had made then extremely larger and Mac was self conscious of how her body looked with the large oozing nipples and the full, flabby appearance of her breasts. She had so far hidden them from Harm. Gone were the large but perky breasts that turned her husband on and in their place the equivalent of a singled teat udder...only she had two of them! She burst into tears then as the doctor examined her, completing her humiliation.
“Relax Mrs. Rabb. This is something we can take care of I think. I understand that you do not want to stop nursing.”
“That’s true.”
“Have you had a period since you started the hormone treatments and nursing?”
“No.”
“Then I want you to start taking these pills. They are a low dose of birth control. Now I know you are trying to have a baby of your own, but we need to get your cycle regulated again. The chemicals have messed up your system and we need to use the chemicals to get it to get back into a more normal pattern.”
“How long will I have to stay on them?”
“Give it a month or two. I think then you’re body will reprogram itself and you can stop taking them once it does. With twins, you should be able to produce enough milk for them to thrive and by pumping in the morning, you should have enough milk to tie you over until the next day. Once this slows down you should feel less tired and you should have more interest in other things. Go ahead and get dressed and then you can get this prescription filled. I would start it right away.”
“Thank you Dr. Dillard.”
At Mac’s request, Harm postponed their plans for Saturday night. Instead she told him she would rather wait until she was feeling up to going out with him...and tormenting him with what she was or wasn’t wearing under her dress. That in itself was enough to put Harm in an uncomfortable state that evening. The anticipation of what she might do and the anticipation of the actual night out, had him very uncomfortable.
By Sunday night Harm was in the worse mood she had seen him in. After getting the babies settled for the night, while the loyal dog Muffin once again taking her place at the nursery door, Mac turned her attention to Harm. Although she was not prepared or interested in her own sexual release, she had become aware of Harm’s needs and had made up her mind that it was time to explore some alternatives so that he could find a release. She had also spoken to Harriet who had told her about a few things she had learned herself.
“Harm...maybe tonight we could...try.”
“Try?”
“I want to try making love tonight.”
“Mac, we don’t need to force anything...I’d rather wait and just let it happen, like we usually do.”
“I know...but you’ve been out of sorts for the last few days and I thought maybe if you could at least have some release it would help...besides, you’ve always said my tongue was lethal,” Mac was going for light and teasing.
Harm tensed when he heard her words. She was trying to hard. She was trying to satisfy him, and he was about mutual gratification. Her willingness to sacrifice her own needs to ‘keep him happy’ upset him. That’s not what he wanted for them.
“I don’t think so Mac..”
“But why,” Mac cupped him with one hand as she slid the other across his chest.
“Mac, stop!”
“I’m trying to do something nice for you and you push me away. It figures!” Mac stormed as she turned and headed up the stairs. “You might as well sleep down here then!” Mac hollered over her shoulder.
Harm turned the lights off and pulled the blanket on the couch over him as he laid down. For the first time since they had been married, they were going to bed upset with each other. Harm didn’t sleep much even though he was comfortable on the couch.
Upstairs, Mac climbed into bed and cried into Harm’s pillow. She was still awake when she heard Heath cry. Getting up she went to him and picked him up in her arms. “Ssshhh sweet boy. Let’s get you into dry clothes. It doesn’t feel very comfy does it. Now let’s quiet down before you wake your sister.” Once she had him in dry clothes and nursing, he settled down and filled his tummy. She rocked him quietly as he drank his fill. His little hand resting on her breast was so delicate she had to touch it. He stopped eating and watched her face as she talked. She lifted him to get out any gas bubbles as she patted his back. When he did burp, he ended up spitting up a little on her shoulder.
“Okay, Heath...I think you’ve had enough. Let’s give your sister a chance.” Mac put him back in his crib and turned off the soft music before waking up Tori. She squirmed a little as Mac lifted her, but was in a full voice cry by the time Mac had changed her diaper. Rocking her didn’t settle the little girl down, so she tried walking her and singing to her. Nothing was helping. Tears of frustration filled her eyes as she kissed her daughter and begged her to calm down so she could eat.
Downstairs, Harm heard the crying and knew Tori was awake and unhappy. He usually took this feeding. Tori was turning into a creature of habit and he wasn’t there. It was likely she was upset because this was a break in routine. Harm quietly stood up and walked upstairs. He paused in the doorway of the nursery. Muffin laying next to Heath’s crib, while Mac sat in the chair holding Tori and trying to get her to settle down. He watched as Mac failed to make Tori comfortable.
“Here, let me try.” Harm’s quiet voice startled Mac. He took the crying infant from her arms, and almost immediately, she settled down. “Do you want to nurse her or have me give her the bottle?”
“I’d rather nurse her if she’ll take the nipple.”
Harm settled Tori in her mother’s arms and talked to her quietly until he was sure she was eating her fill. Mac looked up at him.
“Thank you.”
“Your welcome.”
“Are you coming to bed?”
“Do you want me to?”
“It’s up to you,” Mac informed him obviously still somewhat upset with him.
“Mac, I appreciate what you were trying to do...I really do...I’m sorry if I seemed ungrateful.
“You didn’t seem ungrateful Harm...just pigheaded as usual. I don’t want to discuss this now - while I’m nursing. I’m having enough trouble getting Tori to accept me at times.”
“You are?”
“You haven’t noticed?”
“I guess not.”
“I think the twins have favorite parents...at least Tori does. Heath seems happy most of the time. But with Tori, if she’s out of sorts, you are usually the one that can comfort her...not me.” Harm heard the sad dejected note in Mac’s voice as she spoke softly, her eyes never leaving the little girl at her breast.
“What can I do?”
“I guess nothing...she’s a girl and you’re you...I should be use to it by now.”
A light came on in Harm’s brain. Mac was feeling inadequate in many ways and his need to satisfy her first before he allowed himself to be satisfied, was complicating matters. Every time she had ever had to deal with someone else being interested in him, she had basically done the same thing...played it cool. A tenderness came over him at that moment. He loved this woman so much and he did not want her to feel inadequate. He could see her offer in a new way now and it changed his reaction.
“I’ll be back in a minute,” he told her.
Mac looked up and watched him walk away. She hoped she hadn’t driven him further away...that he would decide to return to their bed, even if he didn’t want what she had offered.
Harm went downstairs and put the blanket away. He made sure the house was secure and returned to their bedroom. He stripped off his clothes and slipped his robe on before returning to the nursery. Mac had just finished feeding Tori and burping her. Harm took the tiny baby and placed her gently in her crib. He felt Mac standing next to him and he slipped his arm around her shoulder.
“You are a fantastic mother Mac...and wife. I on the other hand am a bit of a dud as a husband - at times,” he grinned as he looked down to her. “Can I have another chance to do this evening over?”
“You mean to come to bed?”
“Yes...and more...if you still want to.”
“You mean it?”
“Yes.”
Harm felt her arms slide around her waist and her lips find his chest in the vee of his robe. Her hands slid lower over his six and squeezed him lightly. His body reacted immediately.
“What changed?” Mac asked.
“Let’s go to our room first.” Once in the bedroom with the door closed, Harm turned to Mac again. “I guess I finally understood what you were saying and I realized how you were reading my reaction. We were both doing what we use to do...assuming and not listening. Tori helped me to get it.”
“How?”
“Doesn’t matter now...I just need you...aaahhhh yes Mac...” Harm lost his train of thought as Mac opened his robe and reached for him. The gentle touch of her hand heated his blood and made his knees buckle. He backed up to the bed, sat down and then reclined while Mac made sure he knew that while her body wasn’t ready to accept his, it didn’t change how she felt about his body. He gave Mac control and power in her life again that night and she set about giving him memories and sensations that would warm his blood whenever he recalled this night.
CHAPTER 3
1030 Local
Tuesday April 2, 2006
Rabb Residence
San Diego
“Harriet! I’m so glad you called. How are you?” Mac was pleased to hear her friend on the phone.
[I just got everyone settled for afternoon naps and decided to spend a few minutes doing something for me. Calling you was the first thing I thought of.] Harriet Sims Roberts was the epitome of motherhood and friend as far as Mac was concerned. Over the years she had found that she could talk to Harriet about most anything. Since Harriet was no longer active duty, personal discussions were frequent.
“And I got my crew fed, bathed, diapered and asleep for the morning nap. Good timing,” Mac’s smile carried over the phone lines to Harriet’s ears.
[You sound more chipper then the last time we spoke. Things better?] Harriet asked.
“Yes, I guess...in some ways at least. Harm being Harm wasn’t too opened to my suggestion at first. We got in a fight and he spent the first part of the night on the couch and I cried into his empty pillow.” Mac admitted.
[Mac, I’m so sorry...you said at first...he give in?]
“Thanks to another female...”
[What!]
“Relax Harriet,” Mac smiled. “Tori was being fussy and uncooperative and Dad heard her. As usual she settled down for him. I made one of my usual comments...about girls falling over themselves for him...I guess it got him thinking and he let me know that if I was still willing, he was more open to the possibilities.”
[Harm’s smart...I figured he could figure it out. It took Bud a while too...and you were the one that helped us figure it out...remember?]
“Harriet why is it we can see it and solve it when its someone else but haven’t a clue when we’re in the middle of it ourselves?”
[Human nature I guess. So do you have a happy Captain again?]
“Yes...at least a more relaxed one.”
[But you’re still not back to normal are you?]
“No...Harriet my sex drive has always been...well let’s just say that’s not been a problem for me...or maybe it has when you think of some of the decisions I made as a result...but now...I can’t explain it. I like kissing Harm and it feels good to have him hold me, but I don’t crave it. Nothing he did even raised my pulse a tiny bit...and he has been known to have me pleading with him after just a look.”
[Wow! No wonder you are missing it and worried so much. Did you talk to the doctor?]
“Yeah...I’m not producing milk as much and he said it would take a few days to get my body back on track. I haven’t felt as much like crying the last two days at least. That’s an improvement.”
[Just don’t let your worrying about it effect you. Stay open and one of these times you’re interest in sex will return. My certainly has every time.]
“Thanks Harriet. It does help to talk to you about some of these things. Are you guys still planning to come for a visit?” Mac asked remember the plans they had made while Bud had stayed with them during a west coast assignment.
[We sure are. You said you have space for all of us.]
“We do. Harm converted the basement into three bedrooms, a bathroom, a kitchenette and living room and we still have our exercise room down there.”
[Won’t Chloe and Mattie be staying in the apartment?]
“No...they’ll use the rooms upstairs at least to start with.”
[I saw Mattie the other day. She looked great. She says she’s going to Anapolis in the fall.]
“Yes. She came so close to losing that dream. I swear her determination and Harm’s positive thinking worked a miracle.”
[She claimed your support was important too. Said knowing you were taking care of him, allowed her to focus on what she needed to do.]
“Thanks Harriet...I didn’t know she felt that way. It will be nice to have Chloe and Mattie here together for awhile.”
[You miss work don’t you?]
“Not as much as I thought I would. I’ve given some thought to taken terminal leave...but I hate to loose my retirement benefits.”
[I know. You could go on reserves and work part time.]
“I could...its one more thing to think about.”
[Don’t over think Mac. Take time to enjoy the babies and being a full time Mom...and that hunky husband of yours.]
“Harriet! Not you too?”
[Mac...I may love my husband to distraction and we obviously have no problems in the bedroom...but I also can appreciate just how gorgeous your husband is.] Harriet laughed.
“Uh-oh...one of mine is not happy about something. I guess I’d better go. Thanks for calling Harriet.”
[Take care Mac...and just remember to act as if everything is fine and one say it will be again.]
1235 Local
Harm’s Office
NJS
Harm absent-mindedly answered the phone as he reviewed the latest batch of position papers from his class.
“Captain Rabb.”
[Hello son. Still interested in the mini-van we talked about?]
“Yes.”
[Good. I have it ready for delivery today. Can you meet me on your way home from work. Your mother has added to the surprise and wants to be there when Mac sees it. What if we meet you at the underpass at five-thirty?]
“Will you stay for dinner?”
[You sure?]
“Yes...It will be take out...at least that’s my plan.”
[See you then. I’ll drive the van, your mother will following her car and then you won’t have to take me home.]
“Thanks Frank.”
[See you later.]
Harm hung up the phone and called his home number. Mac picked up on the third ring. Before she spoke he could hear from the background noise that both twins were unhappy.
[Hello?]
“Hi Honey...rough day?”
[Actually no. It’s been a fairly calm day. The morning went well. I thought I’d try out that swing that we were given for them. They were content in that until I dropped a pan just before the phone rang. Then they started crying because the noise startled them. They’ll settle down soon. What’s up?]
“Are you working on dinner?”
[Not really...I was craving brownies and decided to make a batch. Did you have something in mind?]
“Yeah...I Frank and my mother are coming over this evening, and I thought I’d bring take out. Any requests?”
[Sure. Chinese?]
“Okay.”
[Look the new place delivers. Why don’t I call and order a variety and we can all try some of everything if we want.]
“You don’t mind?”
[Not at all.]
“See you around seventeen thirty...oh and we have a surprise for you.”
[Harm...Harm? You hung up on me.]
Mac hung up the phone. ‘What is that man up to now?’ she asked no one in particular.
She would find out in a few hours. The babies had quieted again and she went back to making her brownies.
1745 Local
Rabb Residence
San Diego
Harm had been thrilled with the appearance of the new mini-van he had bought for Mac along with Frank and his mother. They had insisted that it be a gift to Mac from all of them. Frank had insisted on one with all the bells and whistles, which included integrated child safety seats while Trish had bought a second set of infant seat bases so that they wouldn’t have to remove the bases when they used one vehicle or another.
Frank also insisted on the jazzed up pin-striping that really did make the mini-van special and not at all like a ‘mom’ car as Harm had called it years before. The little caravan pulled into the driveway. Frank parked the Pacifica to one side and Trish parked behind him. Harm parked the mini-van, which he had to admit had some zip to it that he hadn’t expected, so that Mac could see it from the house.
“Harm? What’s this?” Mac called as she came out the door, one baby in the snuggli on her chest and the other in her arms.
“Surprise Honey...it’s a little something Frank, Mom and I thought you could use. You like it?”
“Really? I get my own ‘mom’ car?” Mac grinned as she approached them where they stood looking at the car.
“Yes...Here let me take Heath,” Harm offered. Mac had discovered that Tori was more content in the snuggli then in her arms and Heath tended to be upset if he was in the snuggli for very long.
“Oh, let me see my grandbabies,” Trish cooed as she came around the van to join them.
“Hi Trish...would you like to take Tori from me?” Mac offered her the little one snuggled against her chest. Trish accepted her and immediately placed a kiss on the baby’s forehead.
Frank showed Harm and Mac the features of the new minivan. Mac got in and adjusted the seat and looked around the interior. From a DVD player, to CD player, built in cell phone, which Frank had programmed for her with Harm’s help, to the automatic seat and mirror adjustments, this machine was designed for comfort and practicality.
Mac got out to look at the seats and smiled appreciatively at the second set of bases for the car seats. Frank showed her the integrated seats for when the babies were older and the remote controlled side doors.
“Do you like it?” Harm asked her.
“I love it Harm. Thank you!” Mac said as she threw her arms around his neck and hugged him with all she was worth.
“The best thing is, you get to keep the Corvette.”
“Wow! Why?”
“I thought with Chloe being here, we’d need an extra vehicle anyway...one that could be used to transport the children. Frank I talked about it when we played golf last week and he put it together. Mom insisted on the second set of bases and made sure those were in before delivery. They also insisted on paying the down payment and for the decorative paint work.”
“Frank...Trish...thank you.” Mac hugged each one and kissed the babies. “I’ve got a Chinese buffet set out inside. Anyone hungry?”
They all agreed and headed for the house. Frank had since taken Heath from Harm and informed him that he need some grandpa time.
2235 Local
Harm and Mac’s Bedroom
San Diego
Harm was reading in bed when Mac slipped in beside him. She had put on one of his favorite nightgowns, a pale pink satin short nightgown that shimmered in the light and teased his senses. It did it’s job immediately when he looked up and saw her gracefully getting into their bed next to him.
He leaned over to kiss her and was surprised when she began caressing him without warning. He dropped his magazine and pulled her into his arms. He let his hands slide over her warm body as he deepened the kiss. He could see her nipples beneath the fabric and gently touched them. The look in her eyes told him that she had liked the way it made her feel tonight.
They kissed and touched, much like they had the first time they had allowed themselves the privilege of exploration. Harm was aroused immediately, but took his time with her hoping that she would finally be ale to enjoy lovemaking again. He let her touch him as much as she wanted too. He tried not to feel guilty that he was getting more out of the physical part of their relationship these days and keep his focus on the emotional and psychological benefit it gave Mac.
Harm watched Mac as she teased and tantalized him moving her lips from his neck to his wide chest, finding his nipples and playing with them, like he use to play with hers. She was doing all the little things to him that she loved him doing to her. He remembered how she would whimper or moan when something he did felt good to her so he relaxed so that he would be free to make sounds for her, encouraging her attentions.
As her mouth moved lower on his body, he felt himself stir and his arousal increase in anticipation. Her hands tickled and teased his inner thighs as they moved higher and higher lightly brushing against the sensitive area that was waiting and hoping to feel her touch...her mouth. She didn’t disappoint him. She had positioned herself so that his hand was able to easily slide up her legs to her inner thighs while she tasted him. He let his hand wander from her legs to her six and he cupped her buttocks and lightly teased the sensitive areas with his hands. He slid his hands between her legs and caressed her.
While it didn’t drive her wild like it use to, she didn’t stop him or push him away. She even opened her legs to him a little more. He took that as a sign of encouragement and continued to caress her.
Mac could feel Harm’s hands on her rear-end and between her legs. He would discover for himself that although it felt nice, she was not aroused. That pooling heat in her core that she had always felt when he touched her like this, was not there. She wanted him to keep touching her. She hoped that eventually his touch would turn her on. If not, what kind of marriage would they have? She didn’t want to think about it - not now. Right now she wanted to see Harm come unglued under her ministrations. She began to stoke him in earnest now, knowing he was ready for her to be more aggressive in the way she touched him.
Harm felt Mac’s hand tighten around him and he felt her increase the pace of her stokes. The friction between her skin and his was beginning to burn...and it wasn’t a pleasant sensation. He was about to say something, when he felt something cool against his heated arousal. The friction burning stopped, and her hand took on the feel of her body when his arousal stroked inside of her and her muscles clenched around him. He had continued to play with her, caressing her as long as he could until her stroking had him writhing beneath her hand. He felt her mouth hot and moist as she lathed him below where her mouth worked its magic. The last thing he remembered was calling out her name as he found his release.
Harm had no idea how long he slept after his release. He woke expecting to find himself with an uncomfortable mess, but Mac had apparently taken care of that before she had slid into bed beside him and curled against his body. She was sleeping peacefully in his arms. He lay in the dark beside her, thinking about how frustrating it must be not to be turned on, not to be able to experience the release like she had given him. Harm needed to talk to someone about this situation...but who? How much longer could he handle the fact that he could not excite his wife anymore? There had to be something he could do.
Harm was still awake when the babies woke to be fed. He slid out of bed, still naked, and pulled on his bathrobe, before going into pick up Tori and take her with him while he fixed their bottles. She rested comfortably against his chest in the snuggli while he prepared the bottles, changed Heath’s diaper and then fed and burped him. Once he was back in bed, he repeated the process with Tori and settled her in with a song. Removing the snuggli, he returned to the bedroom he shared with Mac, slipped off his robe and back into bed. He curled his naked body against his wife and watched her sleep. His hand brushed her breast and he saw her nipples respond to his touch. He got an idea.
Harm continued to lightly caress Mac’s breasts. He could feel her nipples moisten, and he wondered what they would taste like damp from mother’s milk. He touched one, with is finger and sucked the moisture from his finger. It wasn’t a bad taste at all. He relaxed and realized that he had been a little concerned whether of not he would find her flavor distasteful with the changes her body underwent. He knew that the taste of her milk was not a turn off to him at least.
He lightly trailed his hand down her body and between her legs. She shifted slightly which gave him better access. He spotted the tube of cream she had used to lubricate her hand when she was stroking him and put a drop on his own finger before rubbing it against the nerve bundle hidden in her folds. The heat from her body and his hand, made it easier for him to explore her folds. Although it was unusual that Mac wasn’t aroused enough to provide their lubrication, the cream was working wonders.
Harm watched her face as she began to smile in her sleep while he rolled her bud between his thumb and forefinger. He watched as she brought her own hands to her breasts and lifted the weighty globes, squeezing them lightly together. Her fingers rubbed her own nipples. Harm leaned toward her and kissed her breasts; his tongue lathed her nipples very lightly, all the while he rubbed and caressed the tender areas between her legs. He added more of the cream lubricant as he slipped first one then two fingers inside her. He heard her moan.
Careful not to wake her, Harm concentrated on the areas that she responded to with kisses and gentle strokes. He was gentle in his touching. Somewhat fearful that she would wake up and be upset with him he was on guard. Before long she began to writhe in her sleep. Her legs opened wider to him and he focused his touches in an attempt to bring her pleasure. Her hips began to lift in a pulsing motion and her head roll from side to side.
While he worked the sensitive area between her legs, he also returned his focus to her breasts. She murmured his name as he increased the tempo a little more. Suddenly her eyes opened and she lifted her head questioning him, “Harm?”
“Ssshhh, lay back and enjoy...your body seems to like what I’m doing.”
“Me too....ooohhh yes....uh..uh...faster...yes...yes...” Mac started to make her usual noises when in the throes of passion and although she was half asleep, it was obvious her body liked what was happening to it. She cried out and then collapsed again in their bed, against his body. Harm wrapped his arm around her as he spooned around her body. He placed a kiss on her cheek and settled in for some sleep.
0730 Local
Rabb Residence
San Diego
Mac awoke feeling refreshed and alive as she thought about the amazing dream she had the night before. She may not be able to get turned on during lovemaking these days, but she could still have erotic dreams that were almost as good. They even made her body feel as if it had soared and found release during her sleep. She opened her eyes and realized that her sense of time was off again. She jumped out of bed, noticing that she was pretty sticky and messy.
“Must have been a good dream,” Mac chuckled to herself as she rushed to take a quick shower and get dressed before Heath and Tori made their demands known. She was dressed and on her way to the nursery when she spotted the note on the bedside table.
“Good morning, my beautiful wife. I didn’t have the heart to wake you to nurse, so they were bottle fed at zero two hundred and zero six hundred this morning, so hopefully you will be able to sleep in a little. I hope you enjoyed last night as much as I did. I love you. Harm.”
Mac headed for the nursery. Tori was awake so Mac picked her up and settled her at her breast first. Tori ate hungrily and cooed her contentment as her tummy filled. She was an easy baby to burp. Actually she was a pretty easy going baby unless her routine was broken. She seemed to like the crowded conditions when Mac put her in the snuggli and then held Heath to nurse him. It was almost if having been crowded in the womb, similar conditions were comforting.
Once downstairs, Mac settled the two babies in the swing together while she listened to soft music and prepared her own breakfast. She had thought about going out for a run with the stroller today, but her breasts seemed a little more tender this morning then they had been the last few days. She thought it might be wise to postpone running for a day or two, so maybe they would go for a walk instead.
As Mac ate her thoughts turned to the strange note that Harm had left for her. She took it out of her pocket and reread it. Tears welled up in her eyes for a moment until she forced them back. “I am not going to let his sarcasm get to me! Just because I can’t respond to him right now, he’s getting all childish and pouty. Damn him! At least he didn’t take it out on the twins.”
She thought about him letting her sleep in. Normally this would have seemed like such a sweet considerate thing for him to do, but with his sarcastic dig, ‘hoping she enjoyed last night as much as he did,’ she saw it for what it was. He let her sleep in to avoid her. Well if that’s what he wanted then that’s what he’s get. She pushed away her half eaten breakfast and started making plans for the day.
1215 Local
Captain Rabb’s Office
NJS
The phone rang and eventually the answering machine picked up. “Mac? Pick up if you’re there...okay must be you’re taking advantage of the beautiful day and have gone out for awhile. I’ll see you when I get home. I love you.” Harm hung up the phone and took out his lunch. He would be meeting with a student over lunch today...one that was questioning whether they were cut out to serve with JAG.
After the meeting with the student, Harm tried calling Mac again. Still no answer. So he headed for his afternoon classes. Once those were over, he packed up his briefcase and drove home.
1725 Local
Rabb Residence
“Mac? I’m home! Honey, where are you?” Harm called when he got home. In the kitchen on the counter he found a note. He picked it up and read it as Muffin waited for him to notice her.
<Harm, The twins and I have gone out for the afternoon. We’re going to get my mother and go out to dinner. I haven’t spent much time with her lately. Don’t know what time I’ll get home. Don’t wait up for us. I’m sure you’re tired. Mac. >
He tossed the note back on the counter. He was glad that Mac was feeling energized enough to spend some time with Deanna. He knew Mac’s mother was trying hard to get to know her daughter again and at times they had some very emotional discussions. For the most part they lived in the moment. His own mother had invited Deanna to lunch and introduced her to some friends.
Although Deanna wasn’t comfortable with most of Deanna’s friends, she and Trish enjoyed sharing time together as grandmother’s and talking about their children and grandchildren. Frank had invited Deanna to join they for some of the family day events that his company hosted and she had gone and gotten to know some people there. Harm was glad that Deanna seemed to be making a life for herself in the area. It took the pressure off of Mac so she didn’t need to be her mother’s sole focus.
Harm changed and went for a longer run that evening as he was home alone. He loved the way he was able to escape inside himself and work out anything bothering him when he ran. One of the instructors at NJS had found out that he ran and preferred endurance runs and suggested that he enter one of the local marathons. There was one coming up and he was seriously considering it.
After his sixteen mile run up and down the hills of San Diego, under freeways and through loops within housing developments he got home, hot, tired and very sweaty to a still empty house. He showered and fixed a salad with left over chicken for his dinner and then went to the den to read some papers, Muffin at his side. He had trouble concentrating. Something was wrong.
CHAPTER 4
2255 Local
Rabb Residence
San Diego
It was getting late and Mac and the twins were still not home. Harm worried about them. It was after dark and this was not like Mac. He left the den and returned to the kitchen where he had left the note. Something about the note bothered him...a lot. He read it over several times before he realized that she had not said anything about loving him in it. No ‘I love you,’ or even ‘Love, Mac.’ He looked at the clock and almost passed out. It was almost eleven o’clock.
Harm and Mac were usually in bed by this time. He looked at her note and reread, ‘Don’t wait up for us.’ He relaxed a little then realizing that she must have planned to be out this late. He left the outside light on and a light in the kitchen and headed up stairs to go to bed. He knew he wouldn’t sleep but at least she couldn’t fault him for trying. He’d give it another hour before he started making calls.
2340 Local
Rabb Residence
San Diego
Sarah Mackenzie Rabb was exhausted and kicking herself for pulling such a foolish stunt. It was going for midnight and she was exhausted; her mother confused and probably worried as to why she was reluctant to go home; Tori was in an uproar now because her schedule and routine had changed; Harm would probably be in her face about where she had gone and why she had stayed out so late; unless he just didn’t care anymore. Only Heath seemed to be unaffected by her foolishness at the moment.
Hauling herself out of the minivan, she unhitched and removed the carriers holding the twins. She left the shopping bags where they were on the floor of the van and made her way into the house. The jostling had finally been the last straw for Heath. As she entered the house, both babies crying loudly, she wasn’t surprised to find Harm racing down the stairs to rescue the twins from her.
“Mac! Are you okay? What happened?”
“Not now Harm. Help me get them settled.” She handed him one carrier and he took the other one from her as well.
“I’ve got them. You look exhausted. Why don’t you go on up and I’ll settle them. Do they need bottles?”
“No. I nursed them both before I left my mothers.”
“What time was that?” Harm asked just to be sure they had the same time frame.
“Checking up on me now, Harm?”
“No...go on up. I’ll be fine with them.” Harm settled the crying infants fairly easily. Heath was the first one to settle in his bed. Tori on the other hand expected her night time cuddling with Dad. Harm went through his routine with her as if it was seven or eight o’clock instead of the middle of the night. She then relaxed and allowed herself to go to sleep.
Harm went down stairs and locked up, turning off the lights. He returned to their room and Mac was already in bed and appeared to be asleep. Mac placed a kiss on her brow and slid into bed beside her. Listening to her breathing he wasn’t sure she was asleep, but he let her pretend. Something had her upset and he would find out what it was. But for now, he let it go. She obviously wasn’t ready to talk to him.
Harm was still awake at two when the babies were hungry. He crawled out of bed and let Mac sleep. After they had been fed and diapered, both went back to sleep quickly. Harm hoped he would this time as well.
Harm did fall asleep and slept soundly for almost three and a half hours before the twins woke him. There were just two bottles left, so he fixed them and took them up for the babies. They both seemed to be studying his face tonight while they ate, more then he had noticed them doing before. For the time it took him to tend to the twins, he felt peaceful and like he was doing the right thing.
After they were both sleeping again, he returned to bed. He watched Mac sleep for awhile, wondering what had happened that she didn’t want to talk about. He had learned over the years not to push her. When she was ready she would talk to him. He needed to be patient and let her know he was ready and willing to listen when she felt like talking.
He finally fell asleep. When he woke up it was almost eight o’clock. He had over slept. He jumped out of bed, rushed through his morning routine, and into his uniform. He could hear Mac in the nursery with the babies. He ran in and kissed her cheek as he wished her a good day.
“Got to run. I over slept. Have a good day and I’ll see you tonight.”
“Sorry, they were both needing to be nursed so I didn’t take the time to call you.” Mac told him.
“It’s okay. I love you,” he called as he raced down the stairs and headed for the office. There was no answering response from Mac he realized when he was finally in the car and on his way.
1210 Local
Captain Rabb’s Office
NJS
Harm had spent a hectic morning trying to catch up with himself. He hated the feeling of rushing and the aftermath that it brought. Taking a deep breath and forcing himself to relax and focus, he groaned when the phone rang.
“Captain Rabb.”
[Harm, its Deanna. What’s going on?]
“What are you talking about?”
[Sarah shows up here yesterday, late afternoon with the twins, insisting that we need to spend some time together. She insisted on taking me out to eat and then had to go shopping until the stores closed. We get back to my place and its obvious she’s so tired she can hardly think, but she insists she feels great. She makes a big deal of looking over the things I bought and then decides she needs to nurse the twins.
Those babies were so good all afternoon and evening. Anyway, it was well after eleven before she loaded them up and headed home. She made no mention of you at all and then when I asked if you had a fight, she suddenly had to get home and didn’t have time to talk. I’ve dealt with the flight syndrome for my whole life Harm. I thought my daughter had avoided it. I’m not going to let her do to your family what I did to mine. So what’s going on?] Deanna demanded.
“I wish I knew Deanna. We did have a little disagreement about a week ago and I spent part of the night on the couch, but we worked it out before morning. I thought things were fine until I got home yesterday and found a note from her. We always express our love in notes and phone messages...I did in the one I left her yesterday morning. She didn’t. When she got home she went to bed and pretended to be asleep when I came in after getting the twins settled. This morning, she got up and let me over sleep. I agree with you Deanna, something’s not right, but I don’t have a clue what it is.”
[So what are we going to do about it?]
“Confront her?”
[Harm, what does she do when confronted and she’s not ready to deal?]
“She runs...or fights.”
[Exactly. Who else might she talk to?]
“Harriet! Our friend from Washington DC...they’ve been friends since they first met and I know she’s talk to Harriet recently. Thanks Deanna...I’ll keep you posted. Right now, I need to call Harriet.”
[Talk to you later then.]
Harm finally had a plan. He checked the time and placed the call to Harriet. She answered right away.
[Good afternoon.]
“Hi Harriet.”
[Harm! To what do I owe this pleasure?]
“I’m not sure this is a pleasure Harriet...I need your help.”
[What is it?]
“Something has Mac upset. She won’t talk to me...she’s avoiding me. I know you two talk about personal things and I was hoping she had clued you in on what’s bothering her. Can you give me a hint what I’ve done?”
[Harm I have no idea. The last time I talked to Mac was Tuesday and she seemed to be feeling better about things. She was looking forward to working on the intimacy issues with you...] Harriet paused a little uncomfortable talking to Harm about the personal stuff. Harm put her at ease.
“It’s okay Harriet. I’m glad she has you. I know there are things we still have trouble talking about at times, but I thought we were on the right track. I’ve loosened up- a lot - about some things, and Tuesday night I even tried some things on her. She seemed to like it...but then yesterday happened. I don’t know what I did wrong.”
[Harm...never mind...I’ll call her...I need to talk about our trip out this summer anyway. Just don’t say anything to her about talking to me. If I find out anything, I’ll call you at work...or have Bud call you at home.]
“Thanks Harriet. What would we do without you?”
[Figure it out yourselves eventually. But your welcome.]
1230 Local
Rabb Residence
Mac had finished pumping and stored the two bottles in the refrigerator. The freezer supply was out and so she had decided it was time to start restocking. It was a little harder now that she wasn’t producing as much milk to stay ahead of the demand. She had decided to pump after each feeding for the next couple of days so that she could restock and perhaps it would force her to produce a little more milk as the doctor had instructed.
When the phone rang, she grabbed it before she thought what she would say or do if it turned out to be her husband.
“Hello.”
[Mac? Its Harriet...you sound funny.]
“I’m fine. Just distracted I guess. To what do I owe this pleasure?”
[Actually I was calling about the trip, but now I want to know what’s wrong. Are things up in the air with you and Harm again?]
“Oh Harriet, its awful! Tuesday night I followed your suggestion to act as if I wanted to make love again. He seemed to love the attention I gave him and well he fell asleep immediately afterwards. I felt good that I could please him to that extent without...intercourse. I went to sleep and had this great dream , but then I woke up and found this sarcastic note from Harm beside my bed. He made this snide comment about ‘hope I had as much fun as he did.’
Anyway, he had left for work without waking me because he didn’t want to talk to me. He was pouting. So last night I took off before he got home from work and the twins and I spent some time with my mother. We didn’t get home very early and you know Harm...he jumped right in and took over with the twins. I went to bed...and pretended I was asleep. I just couldn’t talk to him Harriet.”
[Why not? Are you sure he was ‘taking over?’ It kind of sounds like he was just helping you out?]
“What are you saying? That I over reacted?”
[I don’t know...maybe. Do you still have the note he left you?]
“Yes.”
[Read it to me...without using the tone you hear when you read it.] Mac read the note to Harriet. She thought a minute and then responded. [Mac, you said you had a dream?]
“Yes...it almost seemed real.”
[What if it was?]
“Harm wouldn’t do that...it had to be a dream.”
[What if it wasn’t? Wouldn’t that put a different twist on the note he left you?]
“Yeah...I suppose...but Harm’s a bit of a prude. He has this thing about mutual satisfaction and he wouldn’t just do that...without my full consent.”
[But Mac, what if he did? What if he realized that one way to help you was to try some of your own tactics on you? Think about it...what do you do to him that he seems to like. Were any of the things in this dream you had, imitations of what you do to him? Did yo feel sore or tender?] Harriet was insistent.
“Yes...they seemed very real...I was going to try running with the jogging stroller, but my breasts were too tender...do you really think...If you’re right, I’ve been a real ass. What am I going to do?
[Would you like me to have Bud call him? Bud’s pretty good at subtle interrogations.]
“Please. I let him oversleep this morning so he’d have to hurry and couldn’t take time to try and talk to me.”
[I’ll get Bud on it. You may have to hang in there a couple of days...just try not to make it worse.]
After hanging up the phone Mac sank onto the couch with the note from Harm in her hands. It certainly took the sarcasm out of the note he left and made her feel like a giant heel.
1830 EST
Robert’s Residence
Virginia
“Bud, Harm and Mac need our help and I need you to talk to Harm about sex.”
“What?!? Harriet, I can’t just discuss sex with him...”
“Why not?”
“Because he’s a Captain; because...because...that’s personal!”
“Oh Bud! He knows I’m going to ask you to call him back. I’ll even tell you what I need you to find out and he asked for us to help him. I talked to Mac today and I’ve got a pretty good idea of what happened.”
“Are you sure?” Bud asked still feeling a little uncomfortable with the topic.
“Yes.”
“Alright...what do you want me to ask him?”
“First, tell him that I talked to Mac...and I think I know what happened. Then tell him that I asked you to ask him these three questions. Ready?”
“What are they?”
“Did he arouse her while she was sleeping? Bud stop making faces and write this down. Did she wake up or seem dreamy? Would anything that he did have made her breasts more tender the next morning?”
“Harriet he’s going to kill me.”
“No he’s not. Go call him...he’ll still be at work.”
“Harriet...”
“I’ll call...you talk.” Harriet said and Bud knew that she meant business.
1600 Local
Captain Rabb’s Office
NJS
“Captain Rabb.”
[Harm, its Bud.]
“Thanks for calling. Did Harriet find out anything?”
[Yes...but she wants me to ask you some questions...personal questions...sir...very personal questions.]
“It’s alright Bud. What does she need to know?”
[Sorry sir...] Harm had to smile. The questions must be hum-dingers to have Bud this nervous. [She wants to know if you aroused her while she was sleeping?]
“Tell her yes, Bud.”
[Did she wake up or seem dreamy?]
“I thought she woke up...she mumbled a little...smiled...encouraged me to continue...”
[Harriet also wanted me to ask you if anything you did would have made her...] Harm heard Bud swallow and had to stifle his chuckle. He would be worse then Bud if their roles were reversed about now. Finally Bud continued.
[...her breasts more tender the next morning?]
“I don’t think so...wait...it wasn’t anything I did...but yes...she might have been.”
[I’m really sorry sir...Harriet wants to talk to you now.]
“It’s okay Bud...thanks. Harriet?”
[Harm, I’m sorry to have to get such personal information but I think I know what happened. She was still asleep and thought she dreamed what happened. When you put in your note about it being as enjoyable for her as for you...she thought you were being sarcastic because she was sure it was a dream. You left for work before she got up the next morning and thought you were avoiding her. She turned the tables and tried to avoid you.]
“Oh Harriet...what do I do?”
[Be honest with her Harm...call if you need me to intervene.]
“Thanks Harriet...I think you’d better go revive Bud. He was having a tough time getting the information you needed.”
[I know...but I thought it would be easier for you hearing the questions from him instead of me.]
“You’re probably right. Thanks again.”
Harm called Deanna back. “I think I’ve got it figured out. If I’m right, things will be okay soon.”
[I hope so.]
“They will. Hang in there. Have you heard from her today?”
[No. Should I call?]
“Yeah...I’m heading home early to surprise her. See if you can keep her on the phone until I get there.”
[I’ll try]
1625 Local
Rabb Residence
Mac was folding the last load of laundry. She figured she had about an hour before Harm would be home. She knew going to her mother’s today wouldn’t work, so she thought she would see if maybe a surprise visit to the Burnett’s claiming that Harm was working late would suffice. Even if she didn’t stay as late...the ringing phone interrupted her planning session.
“Hello.”
[Hi Honey...it’s Mom. How are you today?]
“Good Mom. What’s up?”
[I just got home and thought I’d call and see if you were planning any surprise visits today.]
“No...”
Deanna chatted on about lots of nothing. Mac was moving around getting the babies’ things together so that as soon as she hung up the phone she could take off. She didn’t want to see Harm tonight until Harriet had checked things out...she didn’t want to make things worse. But her mother thought of lots of things to say. She heard a car pull in and looked out.
“Harm’s here Mom...I’ve got to go.”
[Okay, Honey. Talk to you soon.] Mac hung up the phone and turned as if she was going to grab the babies in their carriers and bolt. Harm came running through the door and stopped at the panicked look on her face. She froze staring back at him.
“You and I need to talk.” Harm slowly walked up to his wife and reached for her hands. The babies’ lay in the carriers as if they were going on an excursion. He smiled at her as he tried to find just the right words to make things right. He sat her down on the couch never releasing her hands.
“First, I’m sorry I upset you...I was very serious about what I put in that note.”
“Harriet called you?”
“Yes...and I called her...and Bud called me...and your mother called me...I’m home to try to fix things.”
“Harm, I...”
“Sssshhh hear me out...Tuesday night when we went to bed...you did things to me that were very powerful and intense...I think I was rendered unconscious after my release. Anyway...when I woke up I needed to touch you. I knew you were asleep, but I still wanted to touch you...I love the way your skill feels...and I was curious...I notice that your breasts were moist and I touched one nipple so I could learn your new taste...I liked it...and I thought you did too.
“I began touching your body and caressing you like you had done to me. You started to say things and encourage me to do more. I knew your breasts had been tender so I was focusing on the lower half of your body but you started caressing your own breasts and squeezing them together. I knew at that point you were still asleep but you were also letting me know you wanted my touch.
“You opened your legs for me and I continued to caress you, touch you. I realized that you were dry and so I saw the lubricant you used on me and I used it on you too. I thought you woke up then and when you collapsed after your release, I thought you had felt the same kind of intensity that I had. I wanted to let you sleep. You were so relaxed and looked happy. I couldn’t stay home with you so I did the next best thing...tried to give you time to sleep in.” He looked up from their hands and saw her tears.
“I’m so sorry...I thought I dreamed it...I thought you were being sarcastic...I worried you for nothing...I upset the babies’ routines for nothing...” Mac just sat quietly and cried. Harm opened her arms to him and eventually she moved into his embrace.
“I love you, Honey...please don’t cry anymore...” Harm tried kissing her tears away until she buried her face in his shoulder and wrapped her arms around his neck.
“I’m so sorry...I doubted you and I shouldn’t have...I just never thought you’d really do something that you’ve been uncomfortable with...when Harriet made me realize that it might not have been a dream...I felt terrible...”
“I thought you knew...I didn’t think it would be that unreal for you...” He kissed her face over and over again and she was trying to do the same to him. They both started laughing as they just held onto each other.
“Are we okay?” Harm asked.
“Yes. I’m sorry.”
“So where were you heading tonight?”
“Your mother...”
“I’ll remember that next time we have a problem...” Harm grinned at her.
“You think we’ll have another problem?” Mac asked him.
“Count on it...but we’ll work it out eventually. I love you Mac.”
“I love you too Harm.”
“That’s what panicked me the most...when you left me the note and didn’t tell me you loved me.”
“I do...I’ve loved you so long...I gave up on you so many times...I should know better by now.”
They both looked over as the twins started to object to being ignored. Together, each one holding a baby, they fixed their dinner and chatted, enjoying each other again.
“Poor Bud...” Harm commented later after they had eaten and cleaned up in the kitchen. They had talked a little about Harriet’s involvement in working things out. “He was so upset that Harriet wanted him to ask me personal questions. I’m not sure if it was really the questions or the fact that it was personal about you too.”
“I have a hard time picturing you handling the questions very well.”
“It was important to me, okay...I was not about to take a chance on losing you.”